I genuinely don't know if i ABU

[babybubblescomingsoon]

I was visiting my parents in my hometown last weekend, it was the last time for a while because I'm moving to another country with DP.

My sister and I have always been very close and I wanted to catch up with her that weekend. Her DP and I get on but he is a pretty nasty character, will always swear loudly around my parents (they're not prudes but they appreciate a bit of respect when they take him out for dinner). We arranged that I would text her on the Sunday evening and we would do something.

Sunday evening comes and I text asking if she wants to do something, her reply 'who do you mean?' I said just the two of us because we haven't seen each other for 6 months and I'm about to move away. I told my DP that I want to see her alone for a while and he settled himself with DF and a beer to watch the football. No problems. Her reply was 'well I can't abandon my DP, he's been at work all day and I've not seen him'. They do live together and will continue to do so. They see each other all the time and had also spent the Saturday together all day. She then texted my DM and the conversation went as follows:
Dsis: Hi, what are you up to?
Dm: nothing, what about you?
Dsis: nothing
Dm: why don't you do something with baby , she leaves tomorrow?
Dsis: I'm busy
AIBU to think that she could have taken some time away from him to spend with me? Or AIBU to want to see her alone before I leave? Dsis texted yesterday asking why I haven't FaceTime'd lately because she misses me.

margaret I have never ever told my sister how I feel about her DP. And I never would. It isn't my relationship and I don't know what goes on behind closed doors so it isn't my place

Why couldn't you have just called round while her DP was there? What was the harm in him being there? there might come a time when you will never see your sister alone because you will both have kids rampaging around while you try to talk, what will you do then?

When that time comes I will fully embrace it haveacup however after not seeing my sister for 6 months, Am I really in the wrong for wanting some time just the two of us?

We also would have met for a coffee, my DP knew I wanted alone time with my sister before I left so he found something to do. It would have just been awkward with me, dsis and her DP.

I wonder if your sister is just used to you being absent in her life so is fine with phone calls & facetime etc? She's not that bothered and therefore wouldn't make the effort?

Have you spoken to her at all since you said it would have been nice to see her and she didn't reply?

I once came home after years overseas and my brother and sister in law were too busy the entire time we were home to spend time with us. This was the first time we were bringing home youngest son. We asked them out for dinner, our treat, but they couldn't go because it was shopping night. They did take our two boys out for the afternoon, "to spend time with their cousins". My husband and I used the time to go to the cemetery to my mums grave to tidy it up and leave flowers.

A couple of months later they sent us photos of our boys the day they had taken them out. Only they weren't playing with their cousins, they were with my alcoholic father who was bad to my mother and who owed me a couple of thousand pounds, who they knew I had no intention of going anywhere near.

Families suck sometimes...