To think explore learning have f***ed my Christmas

[Getskinnyordietrying]

Please help, I'm about to cancel my DS(6) membership but want to see what other people think.....
Currently I am paying £129 per month (am inner London) to explore learning for two sessions a week. I've been happy to do so until my DS(6) told me about the following conversation that was had with a tutor

DS: my tooths really wobbly now, I can't wait for the tooth fairy to come, I've seen a magazine I'm going to get.
EXPLORE LEARNING TUTOR: the tooth fairy isn't real, neither is Father Christmas

I brushed over it with him as best I could by hinting she must of been on the naughty list..:I'm 100% sure it's not twisted by DS, his easily distracted in class hence the membership in the first place and he can be lazy if bored but he doesn't lie and has no reason to. I'm utterly gobsmacked!!! I've just booked f*ing Lapland as well! Would anyone else think it's unacceptable for an adult who you are paying to teach your child the curriculum to take away their Christmas magic in this way?

I think it's so sad when people think Christmas is "fucked" because a child stops believing (for whatever reason.)

If a child is young enough to believe in FC they are young enough to swallow whatever line you give them.

What sort of grown adult would say that to an excited child?! It definitely wasn't his place and there's no reason for it! I think it's understandable that op is upset about it but hopefully DS will be happy with your explanation and still feel the Christmas magic, atleast there's plenty of time for the excitement to build again.

What is this- online tutoring? You just don't tell other peoples kids about santa, the tooth fairs, Easter bunny or god. You just don't!

What an arse it's not right for any adult to start telling a child about whether or not Father Christmas exists.
At 6 though your DS is still young enough to believe you when you tell him that his tutor must be stupid because they've got that wrong !

Christmas definitely isn't ruined but who the hell would say that to a 6 year old?! I would complain to EL but lose the dramatics - just make clear that it is not the tutor's job to be making decisions on when your child should learn about the tooth fairy and Father Christmas.

What you say is this:

"Ah well - some people do stop believing in Father Christmas, and once hat happens, he can't visit them any more. Their mum and dad usually take over filling their stockings so they aren't unhappy on Christmas morning. But as long as you carry on believing, he will carry on filling your stocking".

I would be very annoyed about the Tutor and would complain.

Christmas isn't ruined though. My DC haven't believed since they were 5yo. We still have wonderful Christmases, put out stockings, leave mince pies out for Santa the whole bit.

You can have magic without belief.

I honestly don't think I ever believed in father Christmas but it never stopped me being absolutely giddy with excitement at Christmas time. I loved the whole pretence of there being a Father Christmas and leaving a treat out for him and the reindeers on Christmas Eve etc. I also loved meeting a selection of garden centre Santas so I really think your ds will still be absolutely thrilled with Lapland. I'm pretty sure the "Christmas magic" will still be there, don't worry.

As for your AIBU, I suppose it depends if you think the lessons are helping your ds's education or not. I can appreciate that you feel bad but I think as the above poster said, I'm sure you can spin it that FC does exist if you want to continue that. I think kids want to believe.

She shouldn't have said it but she has. Thinking Christmas is 'fucked' over it is a bit melodramatic though as is cancelling the deal over it.

Yeah but she says she just booked Lapland. Which presumably was to include a major santa and reindeer visit. So she has a right to be thinking Christmas is more fucked than normal.

I think Christmas will be a great time to show your son santa and the reindeer in Lapland with his own eyes... that should help :)

That's sad that she took it upon herself to tell him, it's quite mean and unnecessary.

First you don't know for a fact that that is what was said.

Another child could have said something and the tutor was simply there. The tutor might not have contradicted the other child and tried to deflect the conversation but the OP's child picked up that the tutor was agreeing with the other child.That is a far more likely scenario in my experience, (of both kids and Explore Learning sessions where they are taught in groups of 6 or so and are grouped round individual computers)

Secondly other posters have given good advice about dealing with it. The " Santa doesn't visit people who forget to believe" line is brilliant.

Thirdly - it really hasn't ruined Christmas since it is FOUR whole months away. Your 6 year old will have forgotten by then. I would also hope that Christmas is full of so many exciting things, presents and parties and trips and treats and special food and family etc etc - that really somethign someone may have said such a long time ago will make no difference whatsoever.

Be prepared though as kids as young as yours, (I know, I work in a school!), will be discussing this at school and at clubs so you will need to have your answers ready. Many, many parents never buy into the whole Santa thing at all and their kids are keen to display their superior knowledge. (Yes at 6!)

Wrong to slag off a company by name on a public forum when you did not hear what was said.

Also - the reported dialogue does not sound natural - it just doesn't. People don't talk like that

It's not fucked.

We went to Lapland, with a 3 year old (obv totally into the Father Christmas thing), an 11 year old (with learning difficulties, still believed) and a 9 year old who didn't really believe anymore, and was absolutely certain it was me who did it all, but happy to go along with it all to keep it real for her siblings.

except

she had asked me for a tricky item for Christmas. Even as she asked, she said 'I don't think this is possible, because I've never seen one, but', and indeed what she wanted wasn't readily available.

I managed to get it for her (I ended up making it myself). Her face on christmas morning, the day after she asked Father Christmas (the real one, in lapland) for it was priceless. She was back to believing, for that day (and a few after - a couple of weeks later she asked me how I'd managed it, and was amazed when I told her; it really hadn't crossed her mind that it had been me after all).

So all is not lost.

But the tutor shouldn't have said anything.

how much a month??!!! we have one in our local supermarket. For that amount I'd expect something better than the spotty 17year olds who work there.

Just saying.

Cancel the tutoring and spend the money saved on a trip to Lapland (UK one in Windsor is good and a lot cheaper).

Nasty comment about teenage acne there.

A truly horrible condition if you are a sufferer

Most of the 'tutors' are kids themselves aren't they? They wouldn't have realised what a big deal it was.

As someone else said, if he believes in FC then he'll believe the story you tell him about why the tutor said that.
We've always been very open aboit FC being a nice story. We still do FC related things, they just know it's all fun and pretend.
They are under strict instructions not to tell other children before anyone moans at me!
Even though we don't "do" FC, I completely get why you're mad. I've no idea who the company are (or why what ypu pay is relevent) but if they work with young kids they should know better.
But no, they haven't ruined your Christmas.

Why anyone pays for explore is a mystery to me
The 'tutors' are unqualified kids
Not the point of the thread I know