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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask if this is rude?

33 replies

Tobythecat · 06/09/2017 16:03

2 People having a chat, one person who is very lively constantly interrupts the chat. Other person asks if they have an "off" button. Interrupting person is offended by this comment. Who is BU?

OP posts:
MrTrebus · 06/09/2017 16:04

Neither really

GeillisTheWitch · 06/09/2017 16:04

Is the interrupter part of the original 2, or person number 3?

TheSparrowhawk · 06/09/2017 16:06

It depends on the relationship, how and why the person was interrupting, how the 'off' comment was made and whether the interrupting person has been told to pipe down before. I'd say something like that to my sister and she'd call me a bitch and think no more about it - we say that sort of thing to each other all the time. It wouldn't go down so well with other people.

SleepingStandingUp · 06/09/2017 16:06

So lively A keeps interrupting B's attempt as participating? Then B said do you have an off switch? Sounds like A was fed up

smellybeanpole · 06/09/2017 16:06

No one if you're good buddies. If not. Then the person who just told the other person to basically shut up.

Bluntness100 · 06/09/2017 16:08

Well both really, it's rude to keep interrupting someone and talking over them, it's rude to say have you got an off switch, but to be honest, it wouldn't have been said if the first person hadn't kept interrupting.

The interrupter should maybe try to focus on social norms and allowing others to speak, its hugely annoying to be interrupted and talked over constantly.

amusedbush · 06/09/2017 16:13

Phrasing it as "don't you have an off button??" or similar is rude but the constant interrupter is rude. Probably more rude, as they were irritating enough to push the second person to snap at them.

Glumglowworm · 06/09/2017 16:20

Both, but more A, who shouldn't keep interrupting other people. B shouldn't have been rude about it, but they were probably frustrated by repeated interruptions. And A was repeatedly rude, B only one rude comment.

MargotLovedTom1 · 06/09/2017 16:22

Rude would have been: "WOULD YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP AND LET ME SPEAK!!!" Grin.

AmysTiara · 06/09/2017 16:23

The one who keeps interrupting is rude.

ShiftyLookingBadger · 06/09/2017 16:27

Both rude. To be fair, interrupter may not be aware they do it.

I used to finish people's sentences if they hesitated for a microsecond, I had no fucking idea I did it until a friend told me to cut it out Blush

TheAntiBoop · 06/09/2017 16:41

I know a few people who don't know how to converse and you just get a monologue if you don't jump in. So I think it's a 'had to be there' situation

highinthesky · 06/09/2017 16:45

Does anyone on this planet actively enjoy being interrupted?

No, I thought not.

hidinginthenightgarden · 06/09/2017 16:50

Both but more so the interrupter. I hate it when people talk over you like what they have to say is more important.

PollyFlint · 06/09/2017 16:50

They both sound a bit rude ... I'd say the 'off button' person was far more rude, though, as they deliberately said something narky, whereas the interrupter was being excitable and careless rather than deliberately rude. It's pretty rude to pick someone up on their conversational style or mannerisms, even if you find them irritating. You just nod politely and try not to engage in long chats with that person again.

It's also perfectly possible that 'off button' person was droning on and on and monopolising the conversation to the extent that interrupting was the only way of getting a word in. There are a lot of people like that.

EmeraldIsle100 · 06/09/2017 16:55

I would love to say that. I work with some people who take every opportunity to talk endlessly about themselves. It's torture. Maybe I could build up to saying 'have you got an off button'?

I would probably end up being disciplined but I can dream can't I?

I think the person who said it was driven to it by the person who kept interrupting. I would say her approach was sensible and honest not rude.

limitedperiodonly · 06/09/2017 16:57

Depends on the circumstances. If it's a situation where you all know each other then 'off button' person was a twat. If it's a bus stop, then not

HotNatured · 06/09/2017 16:58

Both were rude.

The 'interrupter' was rude, interrupting is ignorant and just says 'my stuff is more interesting than your stuff.

However, the person who said "don't you have an off button?" that's just downright nasty. I would have told that person to get to fuck, personally.

Not that I ever interrupt Wink

blackteasplease · 06/09/2017 17:03

Both are rude.

I sometimes find it hard to know when certain people have finished their sentence and can struggle not to interrupt. So I do keep myself in check.

Finishing off the end of people's sentences is so annyoying (mentioned by a pp)! My dm does it, and inevitably what she days is not what I was about to say!

AllTheWittyNamesAreGone · 06/09/2017 17:14

Constantly interrupting is ruder.

Anecdoche · 06/09/2017 17:17

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

teaandtoast · 06/09/2017 17:20

Interrupter is rude.
Off button person is close to it, but obviously near the the end of their tether.

Bluntness100 · 06/09/2017 17:23

Which of the two people are you op?

ChelleDawg2020 · 06/09/2017 17:25

Depends on how it was said and how friendly they are with one another.

On the balance of probabilities, it sounds like the interrupter was rude, and the person who picked them up on it was also rude.

TonicAndTonic · 06/09/2017 17:27

Both, but the "off button" comment was ruder I reckon, as that was definitely a conscious decision by person B to say something rude, whereas the interruptions probably weren't deliberate rudeness.