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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want to be on work facebook page?

35 replies

Sienna333 · 05/09/2017 14:15

My boss said he wants us all to have our photo taken for the works public Facebook page and then have a bit about ourselves underneath it, like favourite film, food, sport etc. I am really not comfortable with this for many reasons. AIBU for saying this?

OP posts:
BibbidiBobbidi · 05/09/2017 14:16

That would be my idea of hell. YANBU

OurMiracle1106 · 05/09/2017 14:17

No not unreasonable at all; and personally I would feel this could potentially be a safeguarding issue- say someone had a grudge or abusive partner they had escaped from etc?

Original poster
Sienna333 · 05/09/2017 14:19

It's silly but it's made me feel really anxious. I am glad I am not being unreasonable anyway. I am quite a shy and private person so anything like this horrifies me

OP posts:
Coulddowithanap · 05/09/2017 14:20

Definitely not unreasonable.

I don't even have my work listed on Facebook!

scrabbler3 · 05/09/2017 14:21

I have work friends on my Facebook list but I wouldn't want any formal link to my workplace on there. Yanbu.

Leeds2 · 05/09/2017 14:21

Can you refuse to take part? Might help if a few of you feel the same way.

TheKidsAreTakingMySanity · 05/09/2017 14:22

Just say no thank you. There is no requirement for you to be shown on social media.

VladmirsPoutine · 05/09/2017 14:22

Yanbu. Tell your boss to get to fuck - obviously not using those exact words but do express your concern and uncomfortability about it. You can't be forced to do this.

PollyFlint · 05/09/2017 14:29

YANBU - it's up to you if you want to appear in the Facebook stuff or not and if you tell your boss that you don't, there should be no questions asked.

For some people this could even be potentially dangerous, as a PP mentioned.

Original poster
Sienna333 · 05/09/2017 14:30

Thanks all, I feel a bit stronger in myself about it all now.
I guess I just don't fit in here, everyone else is so confident and loves this sort of thing. Makes me feel weird and like there is something wrong with me.

OP posts:
VladmirsPoutine · 05/09/2017 14:32

There's nothing wrong with you at all in this respect. If you have other concerns about your workplace/work then look for something else in the meantime but not wanting to appear in social media is absolutely fine.

lazyarse123 · 05/09/2017 14:38

We occasionally have photo's taken to put on public notice board and twitter when we are doing promotions, I told my boss I didn't want to do it as I am really self conscious, he was totally fine. Just tell him sorry no.

bonfireheart · 05/09/2017 14:43

We have a strict policy at work not to even list our workplace as our employer on Facebook.
I previously worked at a charity and we had all the directors on our website. We turned someone down for funding and they harassed and harassed one of the directors - it was awful.

Original poster
Sienna333 · 05/09/2017 15:22

I am not even on Facebook or Twitter which many people find odd. I just really value my privacy

OP posts:
solarisIsAClassic · 05/09/2017 15:27

I have a personal and professional 'SM presence'. Can't you do that?

It sounds a little like you're trying to prove a point - detrimental to your career.

MiaowTheCat · 05/09/2017 15:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
Sienna333 · 05/09/2017 15:44

No, Solaris. My job isn't really that 'high up' to require social media work profiles.

It's not about trying to prove a point at all. It just makes me feel anxious and uncomfortable.

OP posts:
Time40 · 05/09/2017 15:49

It's potentially dangerous, so YANBU in any way. There is absolutely no way I would agree to this.

solarisIsAClassic · 05/09/2017 15:53

I think it's unusual for this to make you feel anxious or uncomfortable. I'm not judging this, I'm trying to think of a) ways around it b) what I would think as your employer.

Would you feel uncomfortable if you had a second facebook account with nothing more than a professional* headshot and a 'currently works at x'? I would feel uncomfortable linking my personal accounts to work but am happy to have my sparse professional account used.

As your boss, with my interest being your performance at work and nothing else, I would think you were being a bit of a pain in the arse.

*boring and in office clothing as opposed to paid for

CockacidalManiac · 05/09/2017 15:53

It sounds a little like you're trying to prove a point - detrimental to your career.

People have a right to privacy.

CockacidalManiac · 05/09/2017 15:56

As your boss, with my interest being your performance at work and nothing else, I would think you were being a bit of a pain in the arse.

A good manager would not think this, or let it affect their treatment of anyone that wanted to opt out.

AnchorDownDeepBreath · 05/09/2017 15:59

Would you feel uncomfortable if you had a second facebook account with nothing more than a professional headshot and a 'currently works at x'?

Technically against Facebooks T&Cs, which it's cracking down on. It may well lead to both your personal and professional accounts being suspended and if they're deleted, you'll lose all photos etc across both.

maddiemookins16mum · 05/09/2017 16:04

I'd hate it too. Our workplace advises us not to list our work on our own FB page too as customers could "facebook stalk" us. I was once contacted on messenger by a client who was in the process of taking us to court and she wanted me to make an increased offer to settle!!! (the message came through at 11pm on a Saturday night, I suspected wine was involved).

Aquamarine1029 · 05/09/2017 16:20

You are totally within your rights to demand your privacy. I am just like you are. I don't post pictures of myself or allow others to post them of me. In fact, I rarely ever have my photo taken. Maybe twice in the past 10 years. I'm not insecure, I don't think I'm unattractive, but I just don't like it. I'm not on Facebook either. I like my privacy, and of story. Tell your boss to shove it.

schoolgaterebel · 05/09/2017 16:30

My DH was tasked with putting together their companies website along with photos and brief description of each persons qualifications / experience.

A couple of colleagues asked to be excluded, it was not a problem at all. Perfectly normal that not everybody would feel comfortable with this.