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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Is it normal to have very mixed feelings about having children or second kids?

2 replies

malificent7 · 04/09/2017 22:50

I had dd on my own and now she is 9. I am 39.
She is lovely but i have found it very tough as she is s fire cracker.
I think i need to have councelling about how i feel about motherhood. On one hand i know she has been the making of me and has grounded me, on the other i miss my freedom very much. I dont feel like im cut out for it much tbh and im gutted about that.
I really envy those who seem to love motherhood and arent bothered about having alone time and who will cry at the end of the holidays. I will be kind of happy to get time to sort myself out.

I now have a dp and have been with him nearly 2 years. Neither of us are desperate for more kids but i do love babies and love watching other people's.

At 39 im running out of time and i want to forge a new career and go back to uni. I sometimes think dp and i would have a lovely baby together.
Dd loves vabies and would be delighted.
But im not great at motherhood.

I guess im asking is it normal to ve really confused about having more kids and to grieve if you cant really have more under given circumstances.

OP posts:
outofmydepth45 · 04/09/2017 22:53

On having my second and having a set of feelings I never had before I realise I was ill first time round and I should have seen someone. I now feel guilty I didn't love my first in the all consuming way I did my second straight away.

I do suggest you speak to someone either way

malificent7 · 04/09/2017 23:46

I love dd dearly... i think she's the best but i dont love motherhood that much. Wouldnt ve without her.
I think i just need councelling to help me cope with the massive life change

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