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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want to head home asap?

48 replies

MyOtherUsernameWasFunnier · 03/09/2017 07:24

Travelled 6 hours yesterday (leaving very very early in the morning) so DP and teen DS could attend a sporting event. Myself and DD came with, despite me saying a few days ago I would rather have stayed at home because there wasn't much to keep my DD amused. I was told in response to that it would be a fun family weekend.

Myself and DD were left to just wander the streets until we could check in to hotel, she was hot and fed up and overwhelmed by the crowds. I tried to keep it exciting for her, like we are off exploring in a big city, but I doubt it worked very well.

We fell asleep in the hotel room and instead of waking us when he returned around 6pm, DP left us sleeping. I woke at almost 9pm, now with two hungry children who hadn't had dinner and he expected us to find somewhere to go for food at that time. He wasn't understanding that lots of places stop allowing children onto the premises after a certain time. (If I am wrong about this I am prepared to apologise)

I was so angry yesterday because I knew this would happen. I just wanted to go home yesterday, but considering it was me who paid for the hotel room I thought we might as well actually use it. I ended up just ordering food to the room, most of which got thrown in the bin.

Now I've been awake since 6am wanting to head home but should I try and salvage some "family fun" today or cut my losses and sit through an awkward car ride home for 6 hours? I feel like I've spent more time sitting in this hotel room which isn't fun, it's hot and stuffy and boring and I am £200 out of pocket for the privilege.

OP posts:
MarmaladeIsMyJam · 03/09/2017 07:57

Sorry, meant to say attend an event that I wasn't even going to!

Llanali · 03/09/2017 07:57

Frankie and Benny's, Chiquito, Nando's, Wagamama, Hourmet Burger KItchen- all allow children any time.

I agree I'm afraid, you could have made this much better and chose not to. If nothing else, you could have taken D.C. For McDonalds as a treat surely? I know that's MN anathema but it's perfectly fine occasionally.

Cailleach666 · 03/09/2017 07:59

I have no sympathy.

You chose to go on a weekend away.

You chose to drag your DD around "feeling hot, fed up and overwhelmed."

You chose to mismanage your time so that your kids were left without dinner at 9pm.

Zero sympathy.

kateandme · 03/09/2017 08:22

don't think we are all being kind human beings and perhaps helping her have a better day today folks.all moaning it was her mindset that made her day shite.yet here we are ruining todays mindset.
cant we just be friendly and say ok.so it got fucked up.what can you do today.even small things.there has to be something.could you try googling again.ask at local café.or the hotel staf where good thing to go
what bout a picnic even.or finding a nice pub.if the event is over could you drive somewhere now.
don't worry bout yesterday.it wont change how that went.
if you think today will go better by maybe apologising to dp do so.it might hurt your pride but will give him something good to work on.anger immediately disupurses some with kindness.
your having sme time away from the usual four wall make it what you canxx

ThroughThickAndThin01 · 03/09/2017 08:29

Hmm or sometimes opening posters just need to be told their wrong and behaving badly.

DaddyBeer · 03/09/2017 08:29

^that

LynetteScavo · 03/09/2017 08:30

Maybe if you say which city you are on posters can suggest some lovely places and things to do...his old is your DD?

DaddyBeer · 03/09/2017 08:30

Kate and me I meant!

junebirthdaygirl · 03/09/2017 08:35

Could ye drive for a while this morning and then stop somewhere interesting. Have a look around, have lunch , enjoy the area and head off again later.

GrumpyOldBag · 03/09/2017 08:49

should I try and salvage some "family fun" today or cut my losses and sit through an awkward car ride home for 6 hours?

Definitely go for some family fun. Is there somewhere fabulous you could all go out for brunch? A lovely park or museum to visit?

And ignore all the critical posts on here. You can still pull something positive from the weekend.

EternalOptimistToo · 03/09/2017 08:55

I'm surprised at this idea that it's the OP responsibility to organise things for the dd and that the DH has no need to have any input in that.

The DH wanted to go away for the weekend with his(?) ds and clearly wanted the OP and her(?) dd to be there. He said it would be a fun weekend. When did he check how it would be fun too for the other two people involved (the OP and the dd)? Did he look at what else they could do knowing they were reliant on him re the car??

OP i think your DH has been inconsiderate (or suffering from tunnel vision - I have organised the weekend for me and ds therefore I have organised the weekend for everyone type of syndrome).
I also think that the big issue is that you didn't want to go, you knew in advance it would be hard work despite his reassurance and when whatby Unrogeanised didn't work out and things got as hard work as yOU expected, you got angry.

At your place, i would try and make the best out of the weekend. But I would also make it clear that no it wasn't a good day and a nice weekend away for you (even if you are glad that it will have been for him and ds).
And I wouldn't go again for a trip like this unless you are really happy to do it/there are some clear plans for you too etc...

EternalOptimistToo · 03/09/2017 08:59

Cailleach speaking like this to the OP does only one thing.
Showing how little compassion you have for other people, how impossibly high expectations you are putting on people.

It's a shame when it's a website intended to support people.

And a shame when those expectations of yours are impossible to upheld all the time in RL life.

Bluntness100 · 03/09/2017 09:02

I'm surprised at this idea that it's the OP responsibility to organise things for the dd and that the DH has no need to have any input in that

Huh? She had something organised and the kid didn't want to do it. So what now the big man has to step in and sort out entertainment as the little woman is too incapable. How hard is it do organise something to do with your kid. Not hard at all. It's hardly a big ask. He was with one kid, she should be able to sort out some entertainment for another. Even if it was just a trip to the cinema.

Taylor22 · 03/09/2017 09:09

If you are in Cardiff head down to the Bay. There's a cinema, Dr Who experience and Techniquest. Hours of fun. And loads of really nice places to eat.

BrieAndChilli · 03/09/2017 09:18

I'm a bit Hmm that someone who can post on mumsnet can't 'use' google!!! Even if you can't you could have posted on here before you went for recommendations for things to do and places to eat.
Public transport in big cities is much better than driving around and a million times better than in towns and villages

LIZS · 03/09/2017 09:28

Me too brie. And most cities have a hop on-hop off bus tour if you get stuck for things to do or need orientation.

DamnDeDoubtanceIsSpartacus · 03/09/2017 09:33

Put the pokemon Go app on your phone and go pokemon hunting!

MumIsRunningAMarathon · 03/09/2017 09:54

Hmmthis is the sort of rubbish which supports the 'weak,moody female' idea

Just woman up op.... it's embarrassing

IamEarthymama · 03/09/2017 10:01

If it is Cardiff, you are self-sabotaging!
It was glorious here in South Wales yesterday and there is so much to do in the capital.

I work with small children and going on the train to the museum is one of our highlights. There's a lovely grassy area with a cafe outside, or two cafes indoors.
Lots of hands on displays, lots to learn.

As pp said, you can go to the Bay, buses are regular. You could have walked around Bute Gardens and got on the water bus, it's fun.

Learn from this; you didn't want to go so you ensured it was a rubbish day. We have all done things like this so I do feel a little sorry for you, but especially for your daughter. Either go with DH and make sure you have plan A, plan B etc in place or stay at home.

My ex used to suck the joy out of anything he wasn't 100% keen on, its soul destroying. I am like Pollyanna, while being fully aware how annoying that is Wink

So it's raining today.
Cardiff Museum (free)
Techniquest or Dr Who Experience at the Bay

Or google cardiffmummy's blog; she always has some good ideas.

Have a nice day.

PoppyPopcorn · 03/09/2017 10:13

I did but DD decided she did not want to do it.

There's your problem. You tell. You don't negotiate. There is this little known website called Tripadvisor which is perfect for seeing what there is to do in any city on earth. Hmm It is not your DP's fault that you were chronically useless at forward planning and having your wits about you, quite frankly "wandering the streets" aimlessly is a bit pathetic. As is not taking the initiative and finding the nearest McDonalds, which would have been open at 9pm and would have let your kids in.

Cailleach666 · 03/09/2017 10:35

*this is the sort of rubbish which supports the 'weak,moody female' idea

Just woman up op.... it's embarrassing*

I agree- it's pathetic.

PandorasXbox · 03/09/2017 11:12

Myself and DD were left to just wander the streets until we could check in to hotel,

Oh please. You're a grown woman! You could have looked for things to do before you went.

How old is your DD?

SaucyJack · 03/09/2017 11:17

Life is what you make it. I shall stop there.

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