to not buy the "elderly" excuse?

[ToeKneeChestNut]

MIL has said a few abhorrent racist things in the past. Yesterday's gems were that "blacks" don't know how to cook properly and litter the streets; and that immigrants ("blacks and Eastern European gyppos") cause the majority of crimes in Britain. She always says "we think" as she speaks for FIL.

She's mid-seventies, has lived in Worcestershire all of her life; and her DC say that she's just too old to change and that most elderly people are racist. They and the grandchildren are definitely not racist.

I just don't buy that. Age isn't an excuse. But AIBU?

YANBU. Challenge her whenever you can - that's not acceptable. I wouldn't want my kids around that.

I am in my 70s and totally agree that age is no excuse for being racist; there is NO excuse for being racist.

My DGM, who is sadly dead but would have been in her 90s was one of the most egalitarian, 'right-on' people you could hope to meet. My friends and boyfriends were Black, Asian, white (and gay straight and bi) and she loved them based on "if DGD loves them, they must be wonderful people".

And she grew up in small town Scotland. Her experiences of being a single mum during the war probably helped.

Age is no excuse. It might be for slips in language or not knowing things but hatred and bigotry? Nope.

I am 70 and disagree that age is an excuse for being racist or any other bad behaviour.
Age is not a reason to be wrong.

My parents are of a similar age and don't feel the need to be racist! Age is not an excuse and I would be inclined to mention it every time they say something similar as I wouldn't want my children to think that this was acceptable!

I'm glad you're all saying that, thank you.

I understand that views can become ingrained etc, but I get very annoyed when her racism goes unchallenged by her DC. I'm definitely not going to bite my tongue next time.

Guess which newspaper she subscribes to.

You may never be able to change her views, but you can probably get her not to voice them around you (possibly with a bit of eye rolling and "you're not allowed to say anything any more, are you?" ).

I think a fair number of older people, particularly in areas like Worcester which have practically no immigrants, are prone to panicking about how the world is changing and blaming it all on foreigners (it is easy to catastrophise them if you've never met any).

But that isn't what your DMIL is doing. She's being properly, unequivocally racist. That really isn't common these days, regardless of age, and it hasn't been socially acceptable for about 30 years now. Plenty of time for her to have caught up.