Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think there's nothing wrong with drinking alcohol by yourself...even if you have children to look after

29 replies

orlantina · 02/09/2017 19:07

DF was up recently. DS mentioned to him that I had had some wine by myself. Just enough to get tipsy but not drunk. DS is 12. DF asked me if I drank it alone and then asked if I was lonely. I seemed to get the impression that he had an issue with me drinking wine by myself - as if it's something that can only be done socially.

DS is on his PS4. I have some wine at the weekends but not a lot. It's just me and him. And I do have a tiny social life during the week (on Thursdays)

AIBU to think there is nothing wrong with enjoying some alcohol by yourself?

OP posts:
babybigapple · 02/09/2017 19:08

YANBU but there will be many 'holier than thou' coming shortly who renounced alcohol from conception to adulthood

EssentialHummus · 02/09/2017 19:09

I don't think there's anything inherently wrong with it. I'm not much of a drinker, but my benchmark for what's OK is whether you could still get your DC to A&E if needed.

lornski · 02/09/2017 19:09

gosh no YANBU. and anyway, if you are then so am I. cheers Wine

Pizzalove · 02/09/2017 19:10

It's fine

BubbleAnimal · 02/09/2017 19:10

I have a glass of wine alone of an evening. Or a gin and tonic. I don't get tipsy when I have the children though. I wouldn't be able to drive, as my home measures would be over the limit, but I would definitely be able to get a cab and make sensible decision

BigSunglasses00 · 02/09/2017 19:16

I drink wine by myself (either when DH is out or here but doing his own thing). Having a glass of wine or two while reading a good book or having a Criminal Minds session is luxury. God forbid else was there to spoil it GrinWine

BigSunglasses00 · 02/09/2017 19:17

**anyone else was there

expatinscotland · 02/09/2017 19:20

Your DF is being ridiculous.

MrsTerryPratchett · 02/09/2017 19:21

Having boundaries around alcohol is good. They don't have to be the exact same rules as everyone else. Drinking alone/with others is a boundary. You can decide its for you or not.

I used to sometimes drink at 8am Shock I was a night shift worker and would NEVER DRINK in the evening or night. Because that was my morning/day. One drink after work was 8am. Now I would never dream of drinking at 8am.

If you have issues with the amount, sticking to your own rules or are insensible in charge of a charge, that's an issue!

Bluntness100 · 02/09/2017 19:26

I've no issue with it and do it myself. I do know a couple of people though, quite big drinkers socially, who for some reason think that drinking on your own is weird. I don't really understand it to be honest. Most of the people I know think it's normal behaviour though.

I think there used to be a social stigma about it. Like you were some kind of lush or something,

People can have quite extreme views about alcohol. For me as long as you're not wasted, I can't see the problem.

donajimena · 02/09/2017 19:26

Ah the old A & E line. I did have to go to A & E once after an accident when my youngest fell out of bed. I took a taxi. For an emergency there is an ambulance. I wouldn't drive if it was an emergency even if sober.
Its one thing being a bit tipsy to being blacked out/can barely stand.

Papafran · 02/09/2017 19:29

As long as there is no chance that you have to drive at any point in the evening.

Tumbleweed101 · 02/09/2017 19:30

I will sometimes have a drink alone with children in the house because as a single parent I might never get the chance to chill with an alcoholic drink otherwise!

However I live close to family I could call in an emergency and my adult son can drive.

StillStayingClassySanDiego · 02/09/2017 19:31

I drink alone, I cook and have wine.

Redtartanshoes · 02/09/2017 19:37

I sometimes have a bottle of wine. Da is 11. Tipsy 0ocasuonally. Never drunk. We occasionally go to friends I have wine, we take a taxi home. My mother (non drinker) used to constantly go on about people not drinking when they have kids in the house. And the old A&E line. If ds was poorly I'd call a cab. Or an ambulance.

Some people should live in the real world.

Crunchymum · 02/09/2017 19:40

We don't have a car so the whole being over the limit is a moot point for us.

Of course being utterly pissed is a no no, but there is nothing wrong with a glass or two of wine over the course of an evening?

Phosphorus · 02/09/2017 19:44

Normally it's fine.

How did it bother your son enough that he mentioned it though?

Children are often acutely aware of parents drinking, if they think it's a problem.

IncyWincyGrownUp · 02/09/2017 19:44

Those scoffing at the 'A&E' line: for some of us who use it as a benchmark it means being capable of making the decisions which make a trip to A&E to happen. So calling a taxi or an ambulance and having enough wits about you to manage it is fulfilling that benchmark. It's not about being sober enough to drive.

BubbleAnimal · 02/09/2017 19:47

Exactly Incy. I am not with my children tonight, they are at their dads. I have had too much prosecco to drive. However, if there were an emergency I could get a cab there within twenty minutes, and make decisions sensibly.

babybigapple · 02/09/2017 19:47

Phosphorus children mention all kinds of random shit to visitors, it's not a benchmark of whether OP has a drinking problem. DC form opinions on stuff they see as 'normal' so it's more likely he thought it was okay to mention as having a drink at home alone is normal for OP (and totally fine btw!)

formerbabe · 02/09/2017 19:48

I don't get the driving to a & e thing at all. Plenty of parents don't drive or have a car anyway. If it was a life or death emergency, you'd call an ambulance or for something less urgent, you could get a taxi.

treaclesoda · 02/09/2017 19:54

I think it's fine, it's only a couple of drinks. If it was a whole bottle and/or you were lying incoherent in the corner, that would be a very different thing.

Rachie1973 · 02/09/2017 19:55

LOL I love a couple of glasses of wine on a weekend evening! I don't see an issue

SouthPole · 02/09/2017 19:58

This is me right now, husband is in his mum's and kids in bed...😜

to think there's nothing wrong with drinking alcohol by yourself...even if you have children to look after
OurMiracle1106 · 02/09/2017 20:00

Don't have a child but I love a nice long relaxing candle lit bath with a glass of wine and god forbid anyone disturbing said time

Swipe left for the next trending thread