WWYD abusive ex and dd

[user1469032438]

(I have name changed) this is long but all relevant (probably?)

Basically to cut a long story short around 4 years ago i had a 2 year relationship with an awful guy, both physically and emotionally abusive, split up with him for around 12 months then had a one night stand with him and got pregnant.

As soon as I found out, I sorted my life out, quit drinking completely ( i was a binge drinker) paid off all my debts saved up a couple thousand got me and dd (who is now 6 months) a house of our own. I have always had mental health issues and suffered from severe depression and anxiety which were at an all time worst after this relationship. I didnt get better because i didnt think i was worth getting better for. When we split up I was getting better slowly but still didnt have the motivation, dd changed it all for me and although I still have some way to go, I now see therapists and i finally feel like I am coming out of a tunnel, i feel like i have a future for the first time in as long as i can remember. (I feel this all relevant)

I never told my ex i was pregnant. My family said it was their support or his and i couldnt of done all this without my family. I disnt want him our lives anyway for my dd to see me be treated that way and to be let down by him all the time. He doesnt work has a criminal and is mid thirties so i dont think going to change, he sells drugs so doesnt claim benefits so im not legally entitiled to a penny off him and i really couldnt think of one good reason to tell him.

Fast forward to now. Ex has never stopped texting me asking mundane shut or just being out and ot nasty an example, the other day he text saying "next time i see you im going to smack your face in" then the very next day text me saying "does your phone still do emojis different to mine?" I never reply to any of his texts. Anyway now he has text this morning saying "someone you know has told me youve had a baby" and a little while later "well? Have you or not?"

so my WWYD is.....
would you reply and say yes ?
Reply and say no?
Not reply?
And dies anyone know if he can demand a DNA ? He comes from a very rich family and im terrified he will take me for custody and win even minimal contact i honestly dont think she would be safe.

Sorry so long i didnt want to drip feed.

Don't block him - better to keep the evidence.

Do not reply. You haven't up until now, why start?

Get a new phone. Use that phone as your normal phone.

Do not tell him or anyone he knows he is the father. Don't even mention one night stand.

Block, block, block. Fgs, don't respond to him.

Please screenshot the messages before you block him. I would report the threat of violence to the police. Please find some new friends. Youve cracked everything else, you can crack this too.

Do not engage at all with him. Get another number, as a pp said, and leave that one in a drawer collecting evidence.

Stop 'explaining' your life choices to others - you don't have to. Just say 'I'm not with my baby's father any more' and leave it at that. Or join some parent support groups and find some new friends that you can trust.

The best of luck with everything, you sound like you're winning the battle.

Do not reply. Screengrab all his threatening texts so you have a record of them. Then get a new phone number.

Tell him absolutely nothing. He is stalking and harassing you, FFS.

Just get yourself a new phone and a new number. It can be a new start. Take the old phone to the police and show them the abusive texts, he is issuing threats after all.

Then, as suggested by a PP, maybe give the phone to a friend or family member so that any new threatening messages can be passed on to the police.

You've done so well to get away from him, don't start answering his texts now.

I echo this advice wholeheartedly please do NOT respond at all and then change your number if possible. If not then block his calls.

I left an abusive ex as well, but we were married and so he has ongoing contact with the children. He continues to manipulate them and cause untold emotional damage but as he is on the birth certificate he has a legal right to keep seeing them. Please don't get yourself in that situation.

Also do NOT tell anyone who DDs father is, if you feel like you must then say it's a one-night fling from a totally different part of the country, just in case it gets back to him (it sounds like it might do).

Your "friends" are awful for judging you in the way that they did. Please don't trust them to be looking out for you.

Good luck, please please keep away from this man.

Screen shot and keep all his texts especially abusive ones. Do not reply to any and block him. Doesn't make a difference how rich his family are, he deals drugs so he has nil chance of getting custody.

Thankyou for all the replies, they really mean a lot. I havent replied to him, had some more abuse off him for not replying. Im not going to block because i want to keep his abuse just in case anything else were to happen but i am not going to reply.

Please get yourself another phone or number so you can distance yourself from him. You don't need to be seeing his messages all the time, it's more abuse.