To say something to my friend?

[blackjeansandcardigan]

My friend is liable to cancel the meet ups that we've arranged either the night before or sometimes just a couple of hours before we're meant to meet up. Even when we're arranging them she uses language like she's "probably free" or "that should suit". Then she tells me that the time of an appointment has been changed and she can't see me, or she has something else to organise during the time that we're meant to be going out for coffee.

This has been going on for months now and I've come to expect that she'll cancel at the last minute, yet I've always said "no problem" and been fairly sympathetic. I'm beginning to feel hurt that she's always too busy for me, even when she's suggested the meet up in the first place. WIBU to say something? What should I say? I don't want to upset her or make her feel bad, but surely it's not fair on me?

Oh, one of the friends who cancelled on me has now been cancelled on, so has come crawling back argh.

Agree with the options people are giving for things to say! Had to say pretty much the same to a friend lately, trying to arrange going out for dinner and I'm free every weekend for 2 whole months but she wouldn't give any dates... ended up saying 'ball is in your court' etc and she quickly back tracked and came up with a date - not confident it will actually go ahead though!

I did finally ask my friend this time if it was definite this time & she claims it is... She's asking for news via message & I said I'll explain when we meet...

I do this. Or I used to. I can force myself to honour appointments now, but I have been so anxious that I've had to cancel last minute before.

If you knew me at work you would never ever guess I had this. But in my friendship group, we are all a bit like that.

3 hours till I set off & no cancellation yet... :)
But no answer to my confirmation message...

I'm just back! We finally met up :) She has not been well & is not herself quite yet. Glad that I didn't give up on her.

Sorry to say it OP, but if she's been going out with her other friends, I think she's just not that into you and is just being polite when making these plans.

You need to say something to her, then give her a chance, but if she cancels again, it's not worth investing your time in her.

Try to make some other friends.

I have ME/Cfs and have a few friends with the same. We often have to cancel things because of feeling so tired/exhausted/muzzy and often it's difficult to explain to people as we may have been fine for the previous few days and may be fine the next day (possibly not) but we aren't ok that day and sometimes it's just easier for whatever reason to say something has come up.