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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

About text messages re. work on my day off?? Bloody annoyed!

58 replies

MrsOverTheRoad · 29/08/2017 03:39

I've recently begun working for a friend's business. The friend is WONDERFUL but has gone abroad for a month.

This means that the co-director of the company is now in charge and as far as I can see, she's not really up to the job. She works full time and is trying to do that as well as run the new business.

She delegates things to me which aren't really my job...think inputting a load of data when I'm meant to be a salesperson. (it's a shop of sorts)

And not doing basic stuff in the store when it's her day in there...

Then she texts me on my days off to ask me questions about the last day's business...like "Did you get the office sorted?"

Checking up on me sort of thing or checking up on the progress of buildings works.

Then when I text back, she doesn't respond!!

I think she might feel threatned by me or something. Not sure how to handle it.

She's texted me today and said "Did the builders finish the wall?" so, knowing they had NOT finished it...due to some issues with materials I replied, "No...didn't they call you?"

Which they said they WOULD do...as the foreman wanted to explain some technical stuff to her....and she hasn't bloody responded to my text!

RUDE! Bothering me on my day off...then not responding? AIBU to be wound up?

OP posts:
Original poster
MrsOverTheRoad · 29/08/2017 08:03

The problem is maybe more that she's asking me to do more than my fair share.

I'm an assistant...not a manager as she is and my pay reflects that. I don't feel like I should have the additional stress if I'm not a manager....or being paid like one.

She's giving me basically ALL the tasks to do and when she's in, she's doing nothing but the little "fancy" jobs.

OP posts:
Original poster
MrsOverTheRoad · 29/08/2017 08:07

Plus...I understand that in a small business, everyone mucks in; but not to reply when you've sent me a message to which I have responded quickly, is rude.

OP posts:
80sMum · 29/08/2017 08:09

I always check my work emails at weekends, on my days off and even when I am away on holiday. Sometimes I reply, sometimes I don't. Before I go away on a holiday I make sure I have put an "out of office" responder on email, so people aren't expecting me to respond instantly. However, I find that pinging a quick response saves time when I get back to work to a bursting inbox, as I can eliminate all the messages I have already responded to.

I very rarely get sent texts from work when I am not in the office, but I did once get a phone call at 2.30am!

dudsville · 29/08/2017 08:11

Tell her you don't look at that phone on your days off as you were getting a lot of business calls on it.

Original poster
MrsOverTheRoad · 29/08/2017 08:11

80sMum you wrote "I" 14 times in your post.

Grin

Thanks for the advice though.

OP posts:
BitOutOfPractice · 29/08/2017 08:21

The problem is maybe more that she's asking me to do more than my fair share.

That's not what you said in your op. And is rather a different issue.

It seems to me that you're not the right fit for this business. Or, more charitably, this business isn't the right fit for you.

And the PP using "I" many times was trying too give you the benefit of her experience. Confused

Hairlayerious · 29/08/2017 08:22

I don't like texts when I'm not at work. I do expect them if the matter is urgent though. I work part time (teacher) and over the bank holiday, I've had more than 30 messages from a colleague about non urgent matters.

TDHManchester · 29/08/2017 08:24

Maybe two separate lines, one for work,one for private?
I have a company iphone and when i am not in work, it doesnt get answered. I dont answer emails,txts or phone calls., I have had 7 missed calls sitting on it for weeks.

I might answer an email if it suits me or its from someone i have a good relationship with

Crumbs1 · 29/08/2017 08:30

You sound a bit precious, jobsworth and unsupportive of the business. I'd not employ someone with your attitude. Nobody is forcing you to respond on your day off; if you don't want to think about work don't read the text. I agree you should be more proactive and send an update at the end of each day.

B0ll0x · 29/08/2017 08:32

This whole small businesses work differently thing is such horseshit. Yes, they do work differently, BUT THEY SHOULDN'T, and unless people start challenging the non-existent policies these businesses have then nobody's work life balance will ever improve.

It's your day off? Ignore all contact from work, you're not available

Consistently staying late 'because you have to' - no, you don't. You do your contracted hours only, or negotiate overtime rates

Going over and above and have nothing to show for it? Reign it in, they'll soon notice the difference

I know I sound like a dick, but small business owners need to realise that unless their employees have a stake in the company they are not obliged to work as hard outside of the work environment as the owner.

kingfishergreen · 29/08/2017 08:36

Send her a summary email at the end of your working day so she knows where she stands with everything Then ignore her texts during your day off.

This is my approach. It means I can head-off the incoming questions and if anyone texts about something outside of my update, I will respond, if I deem it necessary.

Also it's really useful for me, because when I get back into the office I use my last week's status as the structure for my next week.

MsPassepartout · 29/08/2017 08:45

If she's juggling running this business with a full time job, then I'd guess a lot of the things you're unhappy about are the result of her being overwhelmed - too much that needs doing and her not having enough time for everything. So I'd pitch in where you can, it's only a month that your friend's away for.

If you really don't want her contacting you on your day off, then I'd second suggestions about sending a comprehensive handover e-mail when you go for your day off. Put a note on the end along the lines of you'll be out and about on your day off, so will be driving and / or places with poor mobile reception, so may not be able to respond to texts etc immediately. It probably won't stop her texting you, but may make you feel less pressured about responding.

Lucysky2017 · 29/08/2017 08:46

Checking up on someone is part of being a manager. You just started here and this is the first time one co-owner is away (for a whole month) so the other is just checking things are being done. She is at full time work all day so having to fit this around that and I presume the business is probably even making a loss at present so her issue will be is it worth paying your wages. So if you want to keep this job I would kow tow to her in this one month - very short period. She is the boss and you are the employee.

Original poster
MrsOverTheRoad · 29/08/2017 08:55

BitOutofPractice Hmm I said

She delegates things to me which aren't really my job...think inputting a load of data when I'm meant to be a salesperson. (it's a shop of sorts)

And not doing basic stuff in the store when it's her day in there...

In my op.....

Lucy she's not checking up on me in the way you'd think a manager should.

She's asking me to do too much ...things SHE needs to do...and then texting me about the tasks on my day off.

OP posts:
MainFlamingo · 29/08/2017 09:03

Are there any other employees there, OP or is it only you?

The manager does sound a bit clueless tbh.

Inertia · 29/08/2017 09:11

I think the suggestion of a handover email at the end of each working day is a good one. It means that there is no reason to bother you, but also provides a record of events when the business owner returns. I'd also copy in the owner, but make it clear that you are doing so in order to make it easy for her to search for information when she returns rather than expecting her to read it now.

In a similar vein, I'd also confirm by email when the co-director asks you to pick up her jobs, and clarify which of your regular tasks she wants to delay in order to accommodate the new work.

Original poster
MrsOverTheRoad · 29/08/2017 09:15

I'm taking that advice thank you Inertia and those others who suggested it.

I suppose I feel slightly overwhelmed...I'm doing things like calling customers on my days off...and remembering to drop things at places or to call power suppliers PLUS inputting data which definitely isn't my job.

OP posts:
ethelfleda · 29/08/2017 09:18

Apologies OP but I agree with people who say you are being a little precious. Although to be fair, I suppose it does depend on circumstance and pay etc.
And I can only compare this to my work situation where 90% of the workforce have this attitude of 'it's not my job' and 'why should I?' Etc etc and the business is struggling at the moment (smallish business). I doubt it will change drastically unless everyone's attitude changes. If I only did the tasks within my job description I would probably get away with working part time Smile and quite regularly deal with things while I'm supposed to be off.
Although I don't class myself as a martyr either, I won't work over unless I need to and then my boss allows me to leave early if I need to occasionally so there is some give and take there. I am rambling a bit now but I do think that give and take is the best attitude from employer/employee as everyone is usually happy. They get the benefit of your help when required and you get the benefit of a bit of grace when you need a bit of time off etc?

ExConstance · 29/08/2017 09:26

I do not have my work phone on when I am not working unless I am on call. If you need a mobile phone for work they should be paying for it and it should be separate. I would not put up with this nonsense. Unless you are paid some sort of standby to be available work is work and the rest of the time is your own.

scrabbler3 · 29/08/2017 09:28

I'd talk to your friend when she returns about what the processes will be when she's away next. It's inappropriate to bother someone on their day off unless they are very senior it it's very urgent. I must say, I find it strange that she's holidaying for a month when the business is in an embryonic stage - it makes me wonder whether this is a serous venture or just some kitchen table hobby that won't really take off.

maddiemookins16mum · 29/08/2017 09:37

One of my Directors texted me at 0715 on a Sunday morning to go online and respond to an 'average review' about our company. It could have waited 26 hours but no, it needed doing then 😏.

RollingGreenMarble · 29/08/2017 09:38

This is rude. My bosses text on my days off or evenings if they need to find something out (I'm the only one doing my kind of work) but always apologise for it and only if they need to know. Its a small business and sometimes they need to, but always with a sorry and a thanks after my reply.

Theresnonamesleft · 29/08/2017 23:49

How did all the small business survive and build up from nothing when there was no mobiles? When you did your 9-5 or whatever and went home. Booked your 2 weeks holiday even the bosses, and off they went undistrurbed unless there was a fire or some other disaster.

I have worked in small and big business. I have worked in places where jd's are blurred. If people want me on call outside my hours then they pay to accommodate this. Many people are already on minimum wage as it is, and to then ask for more unpaid hours does take the proverbial.

Floellabumbags · 30/08/2017 00:35

How did all the small business survive and build up from nothing when there was no mobiles?

The bosses presumably didn't bugger off on holiday for a month at a time.

grandOlejukeofYork · 30/08/2017 04:22

It seems to me that you're not the right fit for this business. Or, more charitably, this business isn't the right fit for you

Because she doesn't want to do the owners work for her and be badgered on her day off? Hmm
Nobody is the right fit for that.