To wish I didn't have to explain that I can count?

[Sugarditch04]

I've worked at the same place for five years.
I'm looking for work but it is a high unemployment rural area so to find something is rare enough but due to childcare I need certain days on and off so I can both look after my dd and earn enough money for us to live.

When I got this job I had to obviously let them know my experience and qualifications. I had experience but I have no qualifications
I won't let it hold me back, I perform well and do the job without a hitch. I am often the most senior person in the workplace unless my manager is in.
My manager is a dick. Every week there's a nasty comment. Last week it was

"We need to do a stock count, co worker name can you start counting up x and y there should be about 80 I don't want my name to do it as she can't count beyond 10"

Always something like that and always in front of other people. To the point where my co workers are often surprised that yes I can count and do everything else when manager fucks off on holiday for 3 weeks at 2 days notice
I can count fine, as well as read, understand and make graphs and charts, do basic algebra, add, subtract and divide.
Im also trusted to count cash and do a weekly bank run, but I'm not trusted to count to approximately 80?

I'm by no means an expert and if I sat a maths GCSE today I'd probably fail but it's perfectly sufficient for my job!
Aibu to wish people wouldn't take the piss?

Do you have a HR department? That's really horrible work bullying.

If not just wmail back to everyone and say why do you think i can't count? And list all the jobs you do when he is there and when he is not!

I'd be making a note of that and all other incidents and taking it to HR if you have one.

If you don't have one, then start looking for another job and enjoy the day you tell him exactly what you think of him. I left a job once, for other reasons, but had a manager who used to walk in and call us all monkeys and talk to us like shit on his shoe. I had the last laugh when I had documented all the things he was doing like falsifying statistics and faking letters and sent it all to the MD on my last day.

I don't it's only a small company - my manager is the only person senior to me, then I have 3 co workers/a team of 3 depending on whether my manager is in or not (if my manager isn't in I step into his role while he's away, which can be from 2 days to 3 weeks at a time). So no one to complain to really - just have to keep searching for another job

Is it possible this manager does actually value you more than you think and is saying this so that others don't complain that you aren't doing x y z he is getting them to do?

What would make you feel better? Taking him aside and telling him you don't appreciate the derogatory comments? Calling him out on it on the spot? Saying nothing and feeling down?

You could have a ready made response for him. Something like. "Seeing as I can't (count beyond 10/do something), perhaps you'd feel more comfortable if I didn't step into your role the next time you're not in the office." Or "I think you mean 8. I can't count my thumbs if using my fingers." If he laughs at you or says something crap, perhaps practice the tinkly little laugh and an eye roll.

Wowfudge, that's a true wow! Advice. He beats you up because he likes you and doesn't want others to know? What kind of rubbish is this? Why does he need to justify if he likes one more than the others? And they are better ways to maintain balance without belittling people if that's "his plan". What the hell is wrong with you? The guys a bully.

YABU at all, your manager sounds awful. It sounds like you don't have that many options if you need to keep the job for the reasons you outlined, but do you think the manager might listen if you told him that these comments are hurtful? Perhaps saying something about all the extra stuff you do, like filling in while he's away, and that you feel he shouldn't belittle you when you do so much to keep the business running smoothly.

for you, it's rubbish to have a bad manager and not feel you have many options for getting away from them.

In the long run I would contact the local college they usually do free level 2 maths courses for adults. Getting this will aid you in getting another job.

That sounds like bullying actually. Do you have an HR department? Is it a big company?

Im also trusted to count cash and do a weekly bank run, but I'm not trusted to count to approximately 80?

Think I would say this the next time he made that comment while staring straight at him. Call him out on it, every single time.

No, again there is no HR department. It is a small company.
I can't afford to study a college course - they require a time commitment that I just can't give without dropping hours at work which just isn't financially possible for me. I've looked into it before

My level of maths is perfectly sufficient for what I do, which is pretty much just counting in one way or another.
Stock counts
Budgetting
Working out percentages (eg profit margins) all of which I do fine. All stuff I can do easily. The more advanced stuff I don't know or would struggle with but it's not anything I'd need for this role or any future roles in this sector.

I've brought up the nasty comments before and I'm told
"I was just joking"
"Don't be so sensitive"
"You know you're being silly - get back to work"
And the one that stung a bit
"You should've tried harder at school if you don't want people to take the piss out of you"

You could have a ready made response for him. Something like. "Seeing as I can't (count beyond 10/do something), perhaps you'd feel more comfortable if I didn't step into your role the next time you're not in the office."
I really recommend you don't get into this sort of bickering with him, it involves stating that he's right (you'll never be able to argue that you're competent after making such a statement, even as a joke).
Also he could just agree, and put someone else in charge next time, and I doubt that'd make you happy.

If you say anything (and you'll need to judge, he doesn't sound receptive to any form of reason!), I would say 'thats not an appropriate comment, and you know its not true', in a flat, clear voice (don't get angry or upset). Then ask a question or make a comment about a work matter, to dismiss it before he can make a rude reply.
His behavior is completely nawful, but in such a small company you'll struggle to make him change - like others I suggest looking for another job :-/.

He is a bully. He is doing this to make himself feel big by making you feel small. He is quite possibly threatened by the fact that someone (you) can do his job without formal qualifications. If he isn't the owner of the business then there is someone above him and that makes him nervous.

You need this job for the reasons you have given but you also need to keep your self-esteem intact. Keep reminding yourself that the only reason he does this is because of his own insecurities. Not only are you perfectly competent at your own job you are also competent at his job.

On a practical note have you looked at online courses for GCSEs? If you could get maths and English under your belt then you would be in a good position to move on from this waste of oxygen when your childcare needs reduce a bit.

I had experience but I have no qualifications

Have you not asked your employer to put you on some training courses, or looked at your local college/online? There's no excuse - you need to be gaining qualifications. You are unlikely to find another job without them.

He sounds like a shit. You can't change him. I second the idea of doing an online GCSE, maybe something like this www.icslearn.co.uk/courses/gcse-and-igcse/gcse-mathematics/ (you could pay for it monthly). It'd be great to do it on the quiet. You sound more than capable, given the stuff you already do.

babs precisely what do you think I'm excusing
My employer doesn't provide any training or qualifications and yes I have looked at local colleges as stated above but I cannot commit enough time without cutting hours at work, which then screws me up financially.

I have been offered other jobs (2) one couldn't offer me enough hours but due to the fact they're split over the same amount of days with a long "break" (unpaid) in the middle,
So for eg,
Right now I would start at 8, finish at 6pm with one hours unpaid break in total split over 2 breaks, so out of 10hrs I am paid for 9.
The other job would've been start at 8, finish at 4 but 2hr closure (treated as not working therefore not getting paid) for lunch plus 1 unpaid 15min break, meaning out of 8hrs im getting paid for less than 6, so I'd be getting paid for considerably less but still paying the same childcare because it's not practical to travel 30min each way to get dd for 1-2hr (which I doubt I'd have been allowed to do)

I'd have been paying almost the same childcare with less money coming in making me worse off and the other wanted me to be able to start at 5:30/6am to set up for the day 2-3 days out of a fortnight and I had no way to get childcare at that time. (I would've had to have left the house at 4:30am to make it on time and the earliest childcare I could find was 7:30am which would've been after I started anyway) so I had to turn both down.

Online GCSEs are too expensive for me to be able to do right now as the last time I looked they were £250 per GCSE - I just don't have that kind of money (yes even with a credit card/payment plan).
I'm not looking for advice on my childcare/work/qualifications situation, just on the way my manager is behaving. I'd appreciate it if we could stick to that topic as I'm finding some comments a bit uncomfortable.

From what you've written it sounds like your maths is fine. Can I ask why you didn't gain qualifications at school?

Your manager is an arse. I suspect he's threatened by the fact that, despite your lack of formal qualifications, you are more than able to do his job.

Is there no one above your manager at all?

Floella I'd rather not go into it, sorry.

Elizabethshaw, not really, no.
He manages the business, his parents own it but live overseas and have no involvement in running it - I don't even know how I'd contact them. Hence why he is as high as I can take anything.

Other than challenging him every time, recording all instances and raising a grievance there's not much else you can do. If his bullying is making it impossible for you to continue working there then it starts to look like constructive dismissal.

If you got less than a C in your GCSE math/English you can redo them (or just do them if you never have) for free at college. I'm about to redo my English one at night school.

Anyway, good luck with the training, getting a new job and fucking off your fool of a boss.

I didn't sit my GCSEs at all - so I have no grade, which disqualifies me from 2 of the 3 closest colleges (that require at least a D or E grade for foundation maths or English) I have contacted both to check if an exception can be made - it cannot.
The third has two programmes
Programme one
"Evening" classes from 4:30pm until 8:30pm, I would then have to travel 45-60mins (depending on wait times) to get home.
I have no one to have DD that late.
The other runs it as a full GCSE programme requiring me to take at least "3 or 4" other GCSEs, which would mean dropping at least one day per week of work. I cannot afford this. There are no benefits nor grants that would allow me to do this. I have searched. That's why I can't afford it - not because they charge £££, fees are very reasonable and just about doable, it's the impact it would have on my work which would fuck me financially.
It is not viable, nor do I think it necessary, for me to do this.

You know your boss is an arse.
But, so do your co-workers.
And your co-workers know that, when he isn't there, you do his job.
And when he isn't there, they probably are as delighted as you are. Nicer atmosphere, no bullying.
You need to do this job, because it suits your current situation.
He is bullying you (and probably everyone else there) with stupid remarks and derogatory statements because he is an arse/feels threatened/etc etc.
It's easier said than done, I know, but if you did not allow his stupid remarks to get at you, then they wouldn't have the same effect.
So practice your eye rolling tinkly laugh ( insert any other MN put downs). If you can turn it to your advantage, even better, "Thanks, Boss, stocktaking's sooo boring and I need to get these spreadsheets finished."
Keep you eyes open for another job coming up that suits your circumstances, which will change as your children get older and less dependant, but in the meantime, just get on with your job and learn to 'screen out' his idiocy. Your co-workers know you are efficient and he is an arse.

If I were you I'd try agreeing with him for a while. For the stock take say yes you're right, I'd better not. I'll just sit here then will I? For cashing up, tell him Boss, I better not, remember you said I can't count past 10, I'm not suitable!
All with a smile. He'll have to change his tune pretty quick, won't he?