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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To find "stuff" overwhelming

29 replies

NicolasFlamel · 26/08/2017 18:10

Just all the bits and bobs you can end up accumulating if you're not on it with decluttering.
I've gone through our porch today and there's loads of hats, gloves, old coats, umbrellas etc. In the shelves in the study there's books we never ever look at, multiples of the same stationary item for some reason, loads of drawings the kids have done.
The wardrobes have lots of shoes that never see the light of day and sets of bedding, towels, blankets etc.
And then you get started on the toys.. just the amount of crap.
So I want to get rid of it but some of it I don't even know what to do with! Does an old coat go in the bin if it's nice enough for charity? Then I worry about all my crap sitting in landfills.

People with less clutter and stuff, how do you do it?

OP posts:

Ellieboolou27 · 26/08/2017 18:12

Yes

KingJoffreysRestingCuntface · 26/08/2017 18:13

I have no clutter.

I also have, "Balls, I should've kept that." moments.

I think the need to have a tidy house is bigger than my need to keep things. I have MH ishoos and it's very much tied into my surroundings.

There are refugees coming over here with nothing. Am sure it could all find a good home.

Pumzile · 26/08/2017 18:15

Hi am not sure if am in the right chart.I need some advice about sterilisation

PickingOakum · 26/08/2017 18:17

Sort it out using the kondo method and carboot or ebay what you want to get rid of.

We do a wholesale review of everything in the house every year, and the motivation comes from the idea that we will make some money back from it all and our space will be clear and clutter free.

And we carboot everything. Clothes, shoes, toys, the lot. If it doesn't sell over the season, then we charity it. Only things in a very poor state go to the tip.

Mumteadumpty · 26/08/2017 18:18

Charity shops are your friend. No landfill, happy customers, and cash for your chosen charity. Even better if you are a tax payer and fill the relevant form in, the charity will benefit even more.

bluebump · 26/08/2017 18:19

I agree, it's sometimes completely overwhelming. I went abroad for 5 weeks a few years ago and lived with what I brought in a suitcase and when I came back I found all of my stuff at home too much.

We've just had another cull of things at home and have given loads to charity and got rid of a ton of bits of paper and broken toys in the bin/recycling but I still think I need to do more.

Sparklingbrook · 26/08/2017 18:20

I have every bank statement since I opened an account in 1984. You never know when you might need these things...

JT05 · 26/08/2017 18:21

Decide to move and downsize! It really focuses your mind.

WhooooAmI24601 · 26/08/2017 18:21

We give the DCs toys and games in decent condition to our local refuge or to the children's ward in the hospital. Their clothes are sent to a local charity or if they're decent are given to the refuge, too. Shoes are either paired up and given to charity if useable or binned if not. Blankets, towels and bedding go to the local vet as they're always in need. Books I forward on to friends who also love reading as soon as I've read them. Their old bikes I usually stick on Facebook with a "free to a good home" message.

The DCs are lucky in that we have a lot of friends and family, so are spoiled at Christmas. However, through the rest of the year I'm quite tight and don't buy lots of bits and bobs. They're also quite tidy and know to clear up after themselves. Ikea Kallax shelving units in their bedrooms are big enough to hold their books and toys but we have a good sort out at least once a year of the boxes.

Our local nursery and playgroups are also always grateful for children's books and fancy dress stuff. I think once you get into the Kondo-sort of mindset you'll find getting rid of stuff so much easier; who needs 57 towels in their cupboard? When will you ever use the 47 year old flannelette bedding that you had as a child?

My Mum is a hoarder and that absolutely has an impact on how mercenary I am now with 'stuff' because I refuse to live in a house with clutter. Things are organised and I know where pretty much everything is. I would melt if my house looked like my Mums even for a day.

PickingOakum · 26/08/2017 18:21

My view is that if something hasn't been used in a year, then it's either kept in the wrong place or we don't need it.

Stationery is an interesting one. Either boot it, or put it somewhere where you will use it.

I admit, though, that I have itchiness about clutter as my DPs have kept nearly everything they've owner since the 70s. They have a loft and a garage full of stuff, and I'm dreading the day it all needs sorting out.

Fandabidozy · 26/08/2017 18:23

YANBU, I find clutter very overwhelming and unfortunately also have slight hoarding tendancies which I'm trying to work through.

I'm terrible for keeping stuff for sentimental reasons or because it might come in useful at some point...

I started off about 6 weeks going through one room at a time with a binbag for landfill for the stuff that is broken, useless or in poor condition clothes. Ive gradually gathered a carrier bag at a time to take to the charity shop and next I plan to reorganise the stuff I have left to make sure it is something I will actually use.

FlandersRocks · 26/08/2017 18:23

Sorry to detail but I can't get past this:

Hi am not sure if am in the right chart.I need some advice about sterilisation

Sort it out using the kondo method

Sounds scary

Ellieboolou27 · 26/08/2017 18:24

Yes! I was thinking this today as I took two huge bags of toys to charity shop, I am overwhelmed at the amount of stuff we have, it just mounts up and I find it hard to stay on top of it. I can't give any advice as in the same boat!
I'm hoping when dd2 starts pre school in September I can really tackle this room by room, drawer by drawer.

Nan0second · 26/08/2017 18:25

Read Marie kondo the life changing magic of tidying up. It sorts out all of these issues!

NotMeNoNo · 26/08/2017 18:28

We have moved to a smaller house . It sure focuses the mind. Things like my massive collection of baking stuff and clothes etc, now I just think "Nah" where before I thought they were essentials.

NotMeNoNo · 26/08/2017 18:30

Oh I have sent stuff to charity shops, sold/given away on Facebook or taken to re use shop or put in recycling, landfill last resort.

Widdsters · 26/08/2017 18:33

Oh TOTALLY! CHUCK IT! Honestly, I drive my man mad - if I'm not using it that second, it's in the bin.
It's so liberating to have your space.
I think it comes from having lived in a van :/ (through choice, just to be clear haha) and not once did we think 'oo I wish I had that...'

Take the time to sell stuff rather than bin if you like, but really who's got time for that.
It's just more stuff to dust really isn't it. Please give it a try? Maybe start with shoes/coats?

NormHonal · 26/08/2017 18:34

Can you afford to pay a professional declutterer to come and help you?

We did this a few years ago before moving, after I had a period of poor health, and it was remarkably freeing. It's amazing what can be achieved in a day. We're talking rooms piled high with random stuff cleared and sorted.

E.g. it doesn't all have to go to charity shops - there are ways other than eBay to sell stuff and they can box up stuff and take it away instantly, and it's gone. I think we made a bit of a profit in the end. We also found some ways to donate stuff like old magazines in ways that it could be useful again rather than being pulped, and got rid of more as a result.

Someone else gently raising their eyebrows when you claim you can't possibly get rid of xyz is also very helpful, and they can swoop and pack something up before you change your mind.

Also knowing they are coming back and having "homework" tasks to complete like sorting paperwork is a real kick up the backside.

Would def do it again if we ever get into that situation again.

Original poster

NicolasFlamel · 26/08/2017 18:40

Oh the paperwork is silly too. DP unearthed a big wedge of payslips from about 6 years ago. We have all the paperwork from old flats we've lived in, loads of bills, again from about 6 years ago.
I get sentimental over toys my kids didn't really play with and all their clothes.
I will check out that Marie Kondo method. I can't live in the chaos anymore!

OP posts:

Viviennemary · 26/08/2017 18:46

Sterilisation of what? Not of marie kondo books. I'm mystified.

reallyorange · 26/08/2017 18:48

I hate hoarding stuff and try to not have anything in the house I'm not aware of, if that makes sense (where it is is a different question...). This is after several international moves.
I try and live by that belief of never having something in your home that you do not know to be useful or believe to be beautiful. And I enjoy having space and clear surfaces more than receiving pointless presents!

Pumzile · 26/08/2017 18:52

I had my tubes tired 3 months ago I just want know if someone have had any problems after the procedure.I have been to see the doctors just to check if everything went well .When I explain that I have been feeling pains on my left side she said I shouldn't and the pain should have gone by now.When I went for scan she said my bowel have moved to my left side which am not sure why.Any advice please

EmpressOfTheSpartacusOceans · 26/08/2017 18:57

Hi Pumzile.

You'd need to start your own thread to ask the question - maybe in www.mumsnet.com/Talk/general_health?

Good luck & I hope someone can help.

FlandersRocks · 26/08/2017 18:57

Pumzile you need to start your own thread in the right section

hellokittymania · 26/08/2017 19:06

I totally understand. I get really overwhelmed if there is a mess, but I have a lot of trouble knowing how to start cleaning the mess. There is a homeless man who I found out sells books, so I have given some of my books to him and I give other things to charity shops. I run a small charity of my own and I have a lot of things that I gather to take with me every time we do workshops or things. Right now I have a huge box of sensory toys, books, games and equipment to take with me to the Philippines and it has been under my kitchen table, but I had to move it since when I was trying to study, I had to move the table. So now, the box is in the front of the chest of drawers and I can't open the chest of drawers. Studio flat, so no room to move anything.

At the autism so, one of the speakers said that one important thing is to really keep things organized and clean. I know that, but it's really hard to do.

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