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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be exhausted and drained from the constant battle I have with my EX and contact.

1 reply

MoanaMoanaMoana · 25/08/2017 17:05

Me and my Ex split 5 years ago, we had a 1 year old DS and I was pregnant with DS2.
We wasn't married and I had to move in with my Parents, I was then lucky enough to have been offered a council house and have been here ever since.

Ever since our split my EX hasn't fought for contact with his children, the current arrangement is 3 Sunday's a month for 6 hours and once a month overnight.

He owns a house and is in a good job but he says that he can't have the children overnight as he has lodgers paying his mortgage so there isn't any room and overnight contact has to be at his parents house and his DM said that she would only sleep them once a month.

He has had a month off to travel the world this year and hasn't had the children any extra time because he's 'busy'. I have had them for the whole of the school holidays as again he went travelling, I asked him to have them an extra day bank holiday weekend rather than just the Sunday and he said that he has things to do so he can't have them.

I get a set amount of maintenance that he said I'm entitled to but this doesn't include the income he gets from his lodgers. Is this normal?

He constantly tries to change contact so he sees his DC less and when I want an extra day he always says no.

What should I do? I'm finding it really unfair and I'm sick of explaining to the DC why their Dad isn't seeing them.

OP posts:
BoneyBackJefferson · 25/08/2017 17:30

there is not a great deal that you can do with regard to contact, if he is going to be a dick he is going to be a dick.

With regard to maintenance there are on line calculators that you can use, www.gov.uk/calculate-your-child-maintenance.

There is a maximum amount that he can get from lodgers and then he has to declare for tax. But I am not sure what these levels are.

It would be worth either going to the CAB or contacting the CSA to gain more knowledge.

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