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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Is this reasonable regarding niece and nephew's gifts?

4 replies

JustWhat · 24/08/2017 17:48

I have 3 grown up nieces and nephews. I made an agreement that they got a biggish gift at 21 and then no more gifts (they have younger siblings too). I always get them a little token anyway but very small. Two are over this age and one is not yet. One of the over 21s needed a suitcase for a big work experience trip abroad so I bought it (£70ish) and said it would be for their birthday (silly mistake I know now!) So, do I have to spend £70 on each of them for this year's birthday or would it be reasonable for me to say to them 'you have £70 for when you need something, it doesn't need to be this birthday, or a any birthday, just let me know when there's something you need' and do the usual token/cheaper gift for the other two respectively? I don't want to just give them £70 cash as that wasn't the plan and the other one might actually have preferred to have the money anyway instead of the case given the choice!

Does that sound reasonable?

OP posts:
nomorebabiesyet · 24/08/2017 17:53

I think at 21 they should be greatful and not expecting anything. You spend what you want and can. They are not kids any more. They shouldnt expect anythinf really. Nor should they argue over it.

JustWhat · 24/08/2017 18:04

Oh no I adore them all and they would never expect anything at all. It'a more about me wanting to treat them equally but preferring to buy them something when they need it rather than just giving them £70 now because their siblings had that amount from me recently.

OP posts:
littlemisssweetness · 24/08/2017 19:22

Not unreasonable at all! Your definitely an amazing aunty!

Dippysnowoman · 24/08/2017 19:59

Very reasonable and very fair. Echo prev poster.. . Top Auntie

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