To feel today I've been a crap mum to my twins?

[Barefootsummers]

I have 2 year old twin boys and I've been feeling unwell and they've been sick but are better now. We stayed in all day and I feel like I've been useless. They watched over an hours tv in the morning whilst I did essential jobs in the house, then they did painting whilst I did the last few jobs. They then watched tv so I could shower. Then they napped. We've got home done a few stories and watched stick man together and now more tv so I can start dinner. They just won't settle and play without fighting. I know it's too much tv and I feel guilty. Guess I'm just hoping for some reassurance that it's not as bad as I think or maybe suggestions on what I could do differently. I can't leave them for 2 minutes without fighting (snatching etc, not hurting each other). Thanks

Thanks again everyone, giving myself some slack now! Can't wait to get out again, our flat is tiny and I think we are all getting cabin fever!

It sounds fine for a normal day, let alone a one-off! Most kids get way more TV time than you'd believe from reading MN.

You've kept two tiny humans alive for two years. I can't even maintain a poinsettia over Christmas.

You don't need to be on the go all the time, you're all allowed days off!

We had a birthday party at home yesterday and we are out all day tomorrow. So today my DCs have been in their PJs all day, they've watched TV, played lego, done some colouring, watched more TV, I've been the subject of playing hairdressers and that's it. I don't feel guilty 😊

Sitting still and listening/watching are important skills to have

Some kids are so active they can't concentrate and learn

Sit back and enjoy some peace

My 5 yr old twins have watched tv for about 6 hours most days this week. It's the only time they aren't arguing and shouting at each other.

Kids need downtime too. And a day of chilling with the tv was probably fantastic as far as they are concerned.
I have a 3yo and 20 month old. TV is essential if I am to make them decent food and keep the house reasonably clean.
Absolutely nothing to worry about!

Kids need downtime just as much as adults do, they really don't need constant, stimulation. You need to find a happy, medium. The.odd doss day watching tv and pottering is fine and kids probably get more out of it than being forced out to do stuff all the time.

I realised the other day that if you have Ceebeebies on for long enough they show the same episodes again on the same day ....Like being a student and watching Neighbours twice....THAT is too much telly. You are doing incredibly well. I struggle with one demanding toddler and you have two and you're not well.

I know how you feel about the guilt - my DS was born at 27 weeks and I still feel guilty now that I was unable to keep him inside long enough, even though he's now a healthy and very active 4 year old. I'm now 34 week pg with DS2 and feel guilty that DS1 world is about to be turned upside down by starting school and a new sibling arriving in a matter of weeks. I've run around like crazy over the summer holidays, arranging play dates and doing activities. As a result I feel like crap today with no energy and everything is sore. DS has spent most of the day on his Kindle - I felt guilty at first until I realised how much he's actually enjoyed it.

I bet your twins have loved it - give yourself a break and rest up. You have to look after yourself before you can look after anyone else!

Oh purlease. A bit of tv never hurt anyone. And you did jobs and stick men? Is this some sort of reverse or joke?

Neglected them?

Two under two here, we have days which involve more tv than that!

Don't worry x

Thank you, all good to know and I appreciate everyone taking the time to comment, it's a great thing to have some support over the Internet when there's none in real life! 10storey - congratulations, and 34 weeks! After a 27 weeker that must be such a relief. I think you can relate to that guilt, even though it's not rational and we have no reason to be guilty. Mine too are absolutely fine, pretty much a miracle for 23 week twins, no developmental delay, cp or anything, we were told they would have a 90 percent chance of disability but they are fine. Oblomov - no not a reverse or a joke, our days are usually very different to this. Thanks again everyone!

barefoot you are already doing such a good job raising twins by yourself, especially such micro preemies with all the complications that follow. So glad to hear they're both healthy, although it must have been very tough at the time. I didn't get counselling at the time, even though it was offered, but I wish I had now as all my feelings resurfaced during this pregnancy. People definitely underestimate the difficulty of prem birth. If you've not already spoken to someone, it may be worth looking into it.

My 6 year old broke his elbow yesterday, today he's in a heavy cast so spent nearly all day watching TV or his tablet. Needs must sometimes.

All fed, no one dead is my motto where children are concerned.

If both these conditions are satisfied, then you're dining a grand job.

My 4 year old got up at 5.30am today... I had only managed to get to sleep around 4am after an unsettled 5 month old through the night...I gave him the tablet to watch in his bed (bedroom has safety gate with two lock types so he can't open it) so I could get some sleep.

When we came downstairs the heavens opened so we watched 2 films - he had his toys and train tracks out that he played with while watching.

We went to visit his friends and they played although friends mum had tv on in the background too.

We then had CBeebies on until it finished before having a book then bed.

Some days we are out all day at zoos/theme parks/museums or friends places and other days go like today.

Don't worry I'm sure you're doing great x

Green cabbage beat me to it.

I had twins. "everyone fed, no one dead" is how you get through years 2-3.

Anything else is a bonus frankly.

Television isn't the devil.
As long as it's not used as a babysitter 24/7, you're not letting them watch Chucky and you make them go outide or interact with real life occassionally, it's fine.
Feel better soon.