To lock her up until she's 18?

[highinthesky]

I sat down with 2yo DD and a book of emojis earlier this morning to see how well she could read emotions and symbols. I was expecting her to recognising "happy face", "sad face", crying face" etc but of course the first thing she pounced upon was the grinning poo.

After which she proceeded to count all the poo-poos on the page (28 if you're interested). So I decided to turn it into a factual assignement and explained how its made from the food the body can't use. Mistake #2: she is now announcing to all and sundry that "poo-poo comes from the bum-bum" and giving them the most angelic smile alongside this new found wisdom.

Which has caused some surprise to strangers in the street that have waved hello to our little madam

She can count to 28?? Stealth boast!

💩

It could be a whole lot worse. We ride and my youngest was fascinated with horses willies when she was 2. Always staring at them and wanting to talk about them. I got a bit fed up of the sniggers on the livery yard so I told her it was no big deal, all boys, whatever the species, have willies and it was far too boring to talk about, in the hope this would shut her up. Fat chance. She was amazed everyone had one and would point to every man and boy we passed on the street and say, "Does he have a willy? Does he? Does HE have a willy?" Mortifying.

A kid of about three-ish recently announced to me that she had "done a poo as big as one of daddy's" that morning. I'd never seen this kid before; she just started chatting to me in the dentist's waiting room while her mum was filling in forms at the counter. Her poor mum went bright red.

She can count to 28! aged 2?

Get those child genius forms filled out.

Ha, ha krusty, she loves the horses in the field next door but has yet to identify a fifth leg

She had a playdate with her nursery friends this morning and they have been amusing themselves with the chant "poo-poo comes from the bum-bum". I'm not certain she'll be invited back in a hurry!

Young children always love anything poo related. Something about poo just peaks the interest for them

My three year old has a poop emoji cushion. She sleeps with it every night and likes it brought down the stairs each day. While in the shop paying for the cushion she loudly stated "I want to hold my poop mum!" Brilliant, I just love hearing her ask for her poop etc but then I am very immature

My then two year old daughter announced at a family meal in a pub that she wanted the loo. It was easiest for my sister to get out and take her, so she very kindly did, expecting a cute little toddler tinkle. But no, it was an enormous poo, which my daughter verbally analysed loudly while other women waited outside the cubicle. "That part is shaped like a shell!" etc. I don't think my sister has ever forgiven me.

get used to it! My favourite 2 year old DD moment was in the airport where she announced 'mummy got poopey on her tights' over and over.

I hadn't, I hasten to add, she'd had poo on her tights the day before and it had, unfortunately, stuck. DD is 7 and finds farts endlessly amusing.

My 5 year old DD has Mr and Mrs Poop Pillows on her bed. I think I got them in a motorway service station. Kids are weird!

I am not sure it ever ends, my pair are 9 and there is still a fair bit of toilet humour.

Wait til you're getting shaken awake by your half naked 3 year old informing you of the "tree - shaped" poo they've just done in the potty.

My ds also 2 has somehow found out that chickens lay eggs which then hatch into baby chicks. Every time he has an egg he now declares it to be a dead baby chick

Once toddler DD need the toilet while we were in a large electrical retailers store that didn't have public toilets. Fortunately rather than risk a toddler accident on their ahop floor the nice manager offered to escort us to the staff loo. Dd gave us ( me, store manager and MIL) a running commentry, 'its coming etc'. It was when she shouted out 'its gone back up' that the store manager lost it laughing and MIL turned bright purple.

Ds (2yo) was fascinated by the concept of worms when he had them. He ate the medicine fine. Then the next day we were walking along the pavement and he saw a worm on the floor.
"I wonder whose bottom that came from," he commented.

Although a friend went one worse. They were invited to a formal meal at her df's work. She (aged 3yo) went out to the toilet and came back with big sister in the middle of the speeches to proclaim in that carrying whisper all could hear: "Mummy, I've got wiggly worms in my poo!"

PollyFlint "A kid of about three-ish recently announced to me that she had "done a poo as big as one of daddy's" that morning."

How weird that she knows how big "daddy's poo" is. Perhaps going to the loo is a "show and tell" opportunity in their house.

There's nothing you can do about as a two year old doesn't know when they are being inappropriate.

You can always rely on a toddler to mortally embarrass you!
We were at a big family party when DS decided to have a rummage through my handbag to find a toy and pulled out all the tampons and pads and lined them up neatly on the floor

Oh and DD favourite word at the moment is BUM very loudly in response to any question she's asked!

Always Ds discovered he could shoot tampons, by pulling out the adapter and pressing it down hard. Unfortunately he discovered this in Tescos. I'll let you visualise this one.

I was once in a very busy country pub for Sunday lunch. There was only one toilet so when I decided to go there was a queu of about three women in front of me. There was a little girl in there who had made her Mum stand outside holding the toilet door closed for her. She then yelled through the door "Mum, does your wee and poo sometimes come out at the same time too?". Cue one embarrassed mother and four women in hysterics.

When I explained to DB at the age of 5 where babies come from he told the next pregnant woman he saw "I know what's in your belly and I know how it got there"