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Original poster

To find it odd she's calls herself a hoe and seems proud of it?

22 replies

tickingoffthetodolist · 20/08/2017 22:02

I've heard a colleague mention so many times that before she met her boyfriend she was such a hoe (her words not mine). She says it with a massive smile on her face and broadcasts it out to anyone so is clearly proud.

I personally don't care if she slept with 10 different men each night or if she hadn't had sex for the last 10 years.

I don't think having sex (safe obviously) with multiple men is anything to be ashamed of but I also don't see it as an accomplishment either. I think if you're a woman looking for just sex, it's very easy to get.

OP posts:
Flatt7 · 20/08/2017 22:10

How old is this colleague?

BarbaraBitchFace · 20/08/2017 22:24

Some people just over share in life. Good for her that she's had lots of sex, not everyone needs to know.

krustykittens · 20/08/2017 22:46

I find it revolting that she calls herself a hoe. It's not clever for women to label themselves and treat with levity the words men use to shame them.

Aeviternity · 20/08/2017 22:52

It's odd that she feels this is something to broadcast in the workplace. It's kind of sad. Like "Me! I have had sex! A lot of sex! With men! MULTIPLE MEN! Men, plural, have wanted to have sex with me!"

Low self-esteem that's so low she now makes everyone else feel bad.

Maybe she's also putting the feelers out to see if any of her colleagues are up for a bit of action. "Attention, office menfolk! I like sex! I may even have it with you! Shall I shout a bit louder?"

MrsTerryPratchett · 20/08/2017 22:55

There is so much wrong with this. Oversharing with colleagues, using a misogynist word, broadcasting her sex life. Weird self-esteem stuff, I'm willing to bet.

nocoolnamesleft · 20/08/2017 23:45

Odd, isn't it, that a man proclaiming himself to be such a stud meets with more approval.

Maybe she's trying to break new ground?

MrsTerryPratchett · 20/08/2017 23:53

'Hoe' == 'stud'. Now we could talk about why there isn't a good word for a female stud but calling yourself a derogatory word for a sex worker isn't cool.

pringlecat · 21/08/2017 01:50

Maybe she's been described as such in the past and is trying to reclaim the word?

lalalandxx · 21/08/2017 02:50

In the younger generations, well with my peers anyway. There is a want to reclaim this word. Boys and men use it all the time to degrade us even for the slightest of things so they can levity. I have been called a hoe because whilst at uni I enjoyed going clubbing and also because I lived with 3 boys. So yes I use this word to reclaim it, the look on men's faces when they try to use it negatively and I agree is priceless.

Although in the workplace I find this odd, unless you have a close knit overly friendly bunch I agree that it is no place for talk like that.

WiganPierre · 21/08/2017 05:23

No, why would you call yourself such a revolting word? And with pride? That's twisted. It sounds as if she thinks she is the first person to invent sex. It's poor self esteem and perhaps she wants men to think of her in a sexual way by planting the thought in people's minds.

PeppermintTeaPlease · 21/08/2017 05:55

It's horrible.

And this might be one case in which pointing out spelling illuminates why it is so horrible: the "ho" letter sequence comes from "hooker" or "whore." ("Hoe" is a garden tool).

Sleephead1 · 21/08/2017 06:06

I think its to reclaim the word. Amber rose in america does a slut walk and has been pictured out wearing a outfit with all the horrible words people called her like ho, slag, goldigger ect. I would imagine its related to that? Im in my early 30s but the choice of insult when i was younger by men when annoyed/ slagging woman off was slag/ slut. I can remember me and my friend bring called slags when we where still virgins? I decided over the years i had them do it it was just a insult to get under the womans skin they have no idea how many people you have slept with 1 or 100 they are just saying it as you are meant to be so insulted. So i just laughed if anyone said it to me. Thats my experience when i was young anyway and its been along time since anyone said it to me. Im sure the younger ones now might be experiencing some other insults shouted at them now by idiots.

pasturesgreen · 21/08/2017 06:08

Quite apart from the use of a misogynist word, that's not really the sort of topic people generally feel inclined to share with colleagues. Urgh!

zippydoodaar · 21/08/2017 06:15

Introduce her to the new boss as the 'office hoe'? Confused

I have no idea why anyone would do this. People are odd.

Gorgosparta · 21/08/2017 06:35

Reclaim the word?

Why?

The lgbt community want to reclaim it because they feel it is more inclusive. They feel it will bring something positive.

What postive comes of reclaiming hoe?

Fact is that talking about your sex life is not ok for the work place. Whether you are attempting to reclaim a term or not. Its not acceptable for men either. Thankfully i have seen shift in this in the last 5 years.

LogicalPsycho · 21/08/2017 06:59

It's not clever for women to label themselves and treat with levity the words men use to shame them.

Does this statement still stand if you change it to;

It's not clever for black people to label themselves and treat with levity the words white men use to shame them.

Because it seems to have worked out alright!

Painfulpain · 21/08/2017 07:03

What do you mean, 'it's worked out alright' logical?

msrisotto · 21/08/2017 07:04

Actually a lot of black people don't like the attempted reclamation of that word either.

PennyTentiary · 21/08/2017 07:08

It isn't appropriate work placement discussion but surely she can refer to herself as a ho if she really wants to (although as I said, inappropriate at work). She's not calling anyone else it I assume? If she's been called it as a put down previously she may find humour or strength in using it for herself. Or maybe she has nothing of interest to say. Who knows.

PugOnToast · 21/08/2017 08:36

Maybe that is how her boyfriend views her and she is trying to feel ok about it by adoring it herself in a 'lighthearted' way

All wrong obv

Gottagetmoving · 21/08/2017 08:50

I've always been puzzled why people share their sexual history with others or are remotely interested in other people's sex lives, well, after the age of about 20.
It's about as interesting as their bowel and bladder experiences.
She sounds a right bore.

LogicalPsycho · 21/08/2017 11:14

Sorry Painful I didn't see that you'd asked me a question.

I'm wary to talk on race issues, but what I meant is that the word has been entirely reclaimed by the people for whom it was being used against.
It has fallen out of general use as a descriptive of any kind; the only time I ever really hear the word, it's a term of endearment between one black person and another.
Although that's more "N_a", rather than "N_er" If that makes a difference? They both sounds the same when spoken.

Ice Cube (the rapper) said recently on the Bill Maher show, that the reclamation meant that they could feel closer through a word used to subjugate for so long, and so hearing a white man use it to get a laugh in 2017 (which Maher did) cuts like a knife. The only people I ever hear using the word are black, and when others do it is shocking to hear. That was what I meant, that the reclamation worked out OK.

I suppose the negative side of this is that hearing it so often you become desensitised to it, where if it hadn't been 'reclaimed' and just banned outright with prejudice owing to its history, then it would always be a shock to hear.

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