AIBU to think there should be a guide to getting older?

[Amummyatlast]

My feet have got bigger. My feet! Concerned about this I googled it and apparently it's common when you get older and they can go up a size every 10 years. At this rate no standard women's shoes will fit by the time I'm in my 60s.

What other less than delightful things do I have to look forward to?

It's not just your hands or your vulva - everything goes bloody saggy!
And that your pubic hair might get sparser, but it will start to migrate too.

Weirdly my feet have gone the other way and seem to have shrunk a size!

Clown wig and Cinnamon's picture also made me guffaw

Loss of tone... skin looks flabby even when not actually flabby. Oh well.

Receding gums... the bane of every middle aged woman?

I find I have put on a bit of weight So I cut back, drink less, have smaller portions, the odd pound a week here and there. And then I go out for dinner and a few drinks and put on about half a stone overnight. FFS

Started getting a few spots on my face then a few more. Never had spots so went to the doctor to be told I can get acne at any age I am 61!!!!!

I also want to wear heels every day and then give in to comfort and wear my flats..

The chin hair is ridiculous! The roots are so big I'm tugging and tugging to get them out. And some of them are grey so I don't see them until the sun catches them when I'm looking in the car visor and don't have my tweezers

At age 67 my mum has just been diagnosed with acute myeloid leukaemia. Apparently 67 is the average age that people get it.

People are saying thinning hair? Mine has gone from baby-soft, manageable and straight, like something from a Timotei ad - to getting more and more wiry every day. It's becoming thicker and going curly. I don't know what to do with it! The monster periods are really effingg annoying!

I must admit that sometimes when I'm talking to parents (I work in schools in a role that supports parents and carer) I tug at my chin hairs to try and eek them out. I'm hoping the parents don't notice (but I know they do!)

DH called my clown wig Chewbacca, today.
Don't remember this happening when i was young & sexy... So long, heyday! Was nice knowing ya...

when I'm talking to parents I tug at my chin hairs to try and eek them out bahahaha amazing!!

Oysterbabe

Annoyingly, DH looks better every day (don't think it is my failing eyesight ).

Feet change shape just like the rest of your body, it'd be weird if they didn't!

You lot are terrifying me with this chin hair talk. Can't electrolysis take care of it? There are some aspects of aging I don't think I could accept. Rage, rage against the coming of the chin hairs!

Lose your public hair - well yes my public hair is definitely thinner than it was. My private hair, on the other hand, sometimes I feel a lawnmower would be more appropriate than a razor. We're not talking a neat little triangle, people...

Periods like a tsunami
One benefit of getting even older is that they eventually stop.

However my internal thermostat is now stuck on "roasting" . At least my heating bills should be lower tries to be positive

YY to hideous periods. When do they stop???

No periods is the exchange for completely losing your clowns wig and gaining huge areolas.

My ma also tells me that walking downhill can be a problem bladder wise but as long as it doesn't actually fall out...

I hate ridges on my nails, gum recession and teeth aching whenever I eat something too chewy.

Was looking forward to the day I didn't have to buy pads for 7 days every month....but now have to buy pads for every day for a weak bladder!
Losing muscle and developing floppy triceps....
Realising that people were right saying that smoking, drinking and sun exposure would show up on your face in later life.

I run my epilator over my beard of fluff when it gets too obvious. Stings a bit.

Creaky knees, arthritic hands that are incapable of opening any jar or bottle, saggy skin....basically saggy everything, chin hair galore, egg white discharge. Basically I'm turning into a grey blancmange.

Dh on the other hand, is looking better and better. Git.