To think we are all as bad as each other?

[Thingslikethisneverwork]

I live in a houseshare with four girls; I am closest to one but friends with the other two.

Two of us (myself included) are quite clean/tidy, two are less so ie we wash up/tidy up regularly, the other two leave washing up for a day or two/don't always tidy up after themselves. Things came to a head in a recent message where one asked everyone to please tidy up after themselves, which was fair enough.

The two who are less tidy got defensive and started sniping amongst themselves. The one who I'm closest to got defensive at the original message (which was not sent by me!) and brought up an incident where I had been untidy... I have since found this out from one of the girls.

There was also an incident earlier today where I got a bit upset by the general mess eg. plates and cups left out despite repeated reminders - I'm not their mother, I don't want to nag! I didn't want to get personal so didn't name names but friend came in shortly after I was talking about it and obviously sensed an atmosphere; asked me whether everything was ok as it was quiet. I bluffed but really don't want this to be a bitchy house; equally though I feel put out as don't know what else to do! If I bring things up, it's discussed; but I do need to let off steam as we are not students anymore and I don't like living like this...

Please help...

Bumping

Just have it out with each other. Call a house meeting. Doesn't have to be nasty or bitchy. You each explain what's going on and feelings in an adult way, and end the meeting with a drink down the pub. Or do it over a meal where u each chip in and help to cook?

You all also need to respect everyone's level of cleanliness and meet in the middle. I.e plates and cups can be left but must be cleaned and put away before going out/to bed/leaving the room. That means those who like cleanliness know it will be cleaned by a certain point and those who don't do things straight away know they don't have to do it right away but also know it has to be done by a certain time.

Have you attempted to draw up a rota? Or do you mean everyone's personal plates and cups?

From experience this is typical of house share. We all regularly moaned about cleaning and house chores but also put that aside and had amazing parties and nights out.

If something is bothering you though, its best to say something than keep it silent.