MN jury. Minor queuing upset causing a lady to glare every time I see her.

[WineIsTheAnswer]

Queuing up about 2 weeks ago.

The set up is this. One queue opens up to 3 tills. Start of the queue is just behind till 2, till 3 is smaller as it is used for the lottery machine and stops the queue from being able to see cashier 3. Queue line doesnt have barriers its just always happened like this. Fairly busy store at lunch hour.

Queue moves along until the lady in front of me is at the front, let's call her Jane. Till 2 becomes free. Jane makes no attempt to use till. Cashier waits for her, nothing happens. I do the "excuse me" pointing at the till, she nods and does nothing. Queue stood waiting. Till 3 becomes free, Jane makes no attempt to use either till, still stands doing nothing. Cashier 2 is still waiting, unsure what to do to make Jane come forward to use the till. Smiling and trying to get eye contact isnt working for cashier 2. So after a minute I pop round to till 3. Suddenly Jane jumps into action, decides IABU and stole her till. So I offer her till 3 and say I'll use till 2. Lots of "how dare you" so I ask her to explain what the problem is, she had two tills and didn't use either and I couldnt wait all day for her. She decides that she wasn't called over to a till and was waiting to be called. I tell her it's not that sort of place. Nothing I can do now, at least we are both getting served. Goes on and on until I snap and say "look, we are all wanting to get served, I waited for you and then offered you till 3 when it was clear you weren't happy. Your getting served, I'm getting served and I would rather do it without going on about it" "well if you didnt steal" came the response. I finish and leave her to her tutting.

Now I've seen Jane frequently since, I wouldn't remember her if it wasn't for her tutting, telling her friends I'll queue jump them and making herself known she's still unhappy with me. Starting to bug me, I thought I was reasonable but she clearly thinks not.

So MN jury, WIBU taking a till and should I have waited for her to select a till even if that means waiting until all 3 tills are free. Surely one person can't control all the tills just because they are at the front. If IABU I'll apologise when she next tuts at me in a coffee shop or points me out to her friends.

Are we now the whole world's social secretary?

Not sure how ensuring the person in front of you in a queue has realised there's a till free makes you a social secretary.

She didn't notice. OP says herself she could have been clearer. As far as she's concerned, OP pushed in. Hence her annoyance. The whole situation could have been avoided if OP or the cashier had communicated clearly.

Again, that doesn't excuse Jane's overreaction or ongoing rudeness.

She didn't notice, the OP said 'excuse me' and gestured. After that it's every woman for herself.

I live in Canada, where everyone falls over themselves to be the nicest person in the room. They would have stood there for hours rather than go for it. It's slow, irritating and doesn't actually help anyone. (And people end up being passive aggressive because they get frustrated.) Much better to be polite but efficient, like the OP.

For me, it depends on how long all of this took.

From reading the OP, it sounds as though Jane was standing in front of an empty till, with a cashier beckoning her over, for a good while. A minute or so maybe? If this is the actual case, then of course OP is NBU at all to just carry on past her.

However, if it all happened in just a matter of seconds - so Jane sees Till 2 clear & waits for a couple of seconds, expecting to hear "cashier number 2 please" or "next please" and while she is doing this Till 3 clears and OP pushes past to get to it - then I can understand Jane's possible annoyance.

In some shops you do have to wait until you're called forward otherwise you are greeted with a "closed, sorry" or just a stern expression (Post Office I'm thinking of you) - by which time the queue behind you has moved on & you've lost your place. After a fairly short time (10 or 20 seconds maybe?) most people would be able to work out that they were not going to be called forward but that the cashier was looking at them with a hopeful expression & go to the till.

So, in short, if Jane did have actual ample time to work out the system but just didn't move (possibly because she wasn't actually looking at the free cashier) then YANBU. However if, in your lunchtime rush & from the benefit of knowing the shop, you actually only gave her a couple of seconds before going round her then YABU.

I dont get what her point was...was she being stubborn and not moving forward until asked ?

Is it Budgen's in Cambridge? They have that set up. YANBU she is. Glare back or just laugh at her!

The whole situation could have been avoided if OP or the cashier had communicated clearly.

No, the whole situation could've been avoided if Jane wasn't dithering and not paying attention.

OP, you were definitely in the right. I can't stand ditherers.

soup oh no!! Sorry!

That happened to me once when I yelled muttered 'for fucks sake' at my desk reading a thread.

Oh and Jane is a tool

I was about to say this would only happen in the UK until I saw the Canada post. Most other countries don't seem to queue like us - Jane would have been flattened with no apology.