No toys allowed!

[ShoutyMcShouty]

We regularly visit a well known garden that is very beautiful. Many of the visitors are elderly but it is also very popular with families, especially those with young children. In recent visits, they've become super strict on what is allowed to be brought in to the garden. I completely accept the no bike or scooter rule, they've added no balls rule soon after, which is also fair enough. However, in the past where people had balls, they tended to be little play balls for toddlers and in my experience, these were only ever used on the common area. No one had a vigorous football game and would not interfere with people enjoying other parts of the garden. It got ridiculous when my baby had in his hands a small ball pool ball, we were asked to leave that at the ticket booth as balls were not allowed . Another occasion we bought a kite from their own shop, excited to try it out on the common but were told it was not allowed. Again, I can see their point but why sell it in the shop? This time we brought a foam sword and a foam shield. The lady at the ticket booth panicked and said that my ds could hurt someone with it if he waved it around, so again have been asked to leave them at the ticket booth. Prying those out of my ds' hands was fun . She said "toys are not allowed". It would seem fun is not allowed either.
Generally, the people who visit seem to be very respectful and civilised, the garden(s) is really big and people tend to do any activities on the common. It is well away from the flowers. Lots of people have picnics on the common and it's at this time when the children will want to play.

Aibu to think this is a shame as if all we are allowed to do is to walk around then I probably won't bother to renew my membership again next year?

Kids need to learn that not everywhere is suitable for charging around, kicking balls and having play fights with weapons.

Sometimes- heaven forbid- they may have to go somewhere that requires them to behave quietly with no charging around.
The world doesn't revolve around children, and not everywhere you visit should be obliged to provide a play area.
Take some small figures or quiet toys if you want to visit quiet places,
Or if your children are incapable of having a few hours without a football or energetic play then go to a park.

I took my kids very regularly to a large city Botanical Garden.
No picnics allowed, no toys, no scooters, no joggers.

They loved it , we spent the day exploring, looking at things, talking about plants, it's a useful way to teach children how to enjoy quieter outdoor activities.

I think it's fair enough to have no toys in gardens like these. It does seem a bit daft to sell a kite you can't use there. Although I suppose the same the same could be said of other things that are sold there. You couldn't buy a packet of seeds Then go and plant them in the gardens.

This is seen in schools now where children can't play chase type games incase they should result in injury.

H&S has gone mad, I don't think javelins are allowed anymore in school!

That's just not true.

It sounds like they have had an incident and they are now panicking.

It's a garden not a park....

DH's family have been taking children to Wisley for decades and we've been going for years, too. We also have a client that works there.

They do welcome children, but they like them to be well-behaved and properly supervised! They are very tolerant of young children and their library is well-stocked with children's books. They do a lot of work and activities for children.

They've never officially allowed balls so I think they've probably turned a blind eye to the properly supervised toddlers like the Op's child, but have had to enforce the rules because people were allowing their children to spoil the plants. Back in SIL's childhood days, they weren't allowed on the grass at all!

I really don't think they need worry about poorly behaved families going elsewhere : their main clientele are gardeners, mostly middle aged and older, and pensioners - they get cross when encountering badly behaved children and lax parenting.

Definitely you're supposed to buy from the gift shop on your way out - like many attractions these days, it's designed as part of the exit.

I know, because our client has moaned long and loud, that they have had an increasing number of parents who think their children should be able to do just as they please, even picking the flowers and I heard of one child allowed to kick his way through a daffodil display while the parent smiled indulgently . I am not including the Op in that description, btw - she's clearly respectful of the Gardens and their staff.

As PP have said, I think you need a park not a garden OP and you have realised that yourself. A blanket ban on toys is a good idea to stop the arguing also mentioned and you know where you stand then, because it seems that on three occasions you've tried to take something in!

I'm sure it's a lovely place, but I'd look for another public space to play in and let your membership go next year.

I just missed all the magical moments when our little ball rolled towards another child and they all start playing together.

If only there were places like this where young children could go and play together....

Also, magical moments? Honestly, you're far too precious.

I rolled my eyes at that too chardonnay
I'm in total agreement with Wisley.

Another one rolling eyes in perfect unison with crispsheets and Chardonnay.

I see many people having magical moments in parks with their children, and yes, it is often lovely to see. I also have to say that I see many people whose magical moments include their children picking handfuls of park daffodils, trampling over flower beds, dropping litter and crashing into other people with their scooters and bikes. Thank heavens for places like Wisley where I can have my own magical moments without having to witness other people's.

Aha - "precious" has been wheeled out now so I will leave it here before "entitled" gets thrown in if it hasn't already !
Thank you everyone for your input. Thanks @Tanith I always make sure my ds respect the plants and wildlife. He is very sweet, the elderly visitors and I were really proud of him when he did the 2 minutes silence on 11/11. He was just 2 years old then (and we happened to be in the shop )
I think with all the development they are making, I might leave a suggestion in the feedback box regarding a play area perhaps for toddlers or expanding their existing one with smaller equipment.
Enjoy the lovely weather coming up - maybe see you at Wisley (without toys this time 😉)