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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To want to live in a two bedroom cottage with three kids?

99 replies

sobigle · 16/08/2017 17:38

It's in the area I love so much and feel so settled in and it's all we can afford there.

Anyone else live in a tiny place with lots of kids?

OP posts:

Luckymummy22 · 17/08/2017 19:34

so really you just want to cheat the school admissions system?

MaryPoppinsPenguins · 17/08/2017 19:36

So this is just renting to get into a school?

Allthewaves · 17/08/2017 19:47

I couldn't imagine my 8 yr old boy sharing with 2 yr old girl. You might have to have the 2 yr old sleeping in your room for a while. Some boys can start puberty as early as 9.

Sunshinegirl82 · 17/08/2017 19:48

There are loads of fantastic schools outside zone 2! If the schools are the most important factor I'd be tempted to move somewhere bigger now within the catchment area for good schools. It won't work to have a child commute from Cambridge to London for school surely? So even if you get them in, what then?

Original poster

sobigle · 17/08/2017 19:55

It's not for the school! Different (more suburban) areas nearby have much better schools. Where I want to be is walkable to the school they're already at and the secondary is ok.

OP posts:

Original poster

sobigle · 17/08/2017 19:56

Plus we don't have to apply for secondary for two years!!

OP posts:

BrieAndChilli · 17/08/2017 20:04

t would be just to rent for a year or so, and to get into a better school, then we could buy a bit further

You wrote this earlier...
Now you are saying it's not for the schools?? Which is it??

Original poster

sobigle · 17/08/2017 20:08

It's a better school than where we are now which is failing. Not the primary reason though, and not the best school around. Can see how that could be misunderstood though

OP posts:

milliemolliemou · 17/08/2017 21:01

This doesn't make sense OP. You are thinking of renting a two bedroom cottage in ?London? where it's a village atmosphere where you already are? You have 2 years before your eldest goes to senior school. You have 3 mixed infants. You want to walk the children to school etc etc.

I have RTT but I'm still confused since it's been a bit of drip feed. Is it renting or buying? If you own a property and are thinking of renting before buying fair enough for a time.

But why not take the plunge now and get a place where the 3 DCs can settle down and have (some) privacy and workspaces as they grow up. And be in an area where you are happy with the schools.

It's lovely for you to walk them to school at the moment but what about 5 years down the line? Is commuting a problem for your DH, are you planning to get back to work?

Original poster

sobigle · 17/08/2017 21:21

I think my thinking about the whole thing is confused which is why the thread is confusing.

Basically I want to live in an area which I love but which is really expensive and so we can only afford a small place. We lived there until recently in a small place. We can afford more space elsewhere. I haven't yet found an elsewhere where I want to live. We currently live near the area I love, in a suburban area which I really - strong word - hate.

So I guess the logical thing is to move to a different area which is more busy / urban which is also more affordable and has stuff the kids need like great schools. But I love my old area and want to live there!

Ok I'm a nightmare, I can see that.

OP posts:

MyLittlePickleBoo · 17/08/2017 21:50

Yes, yes you are OP!

You've just said you moved out of the area you loved where you lived in a small place, so I don't understand why you even need to 'try' living in another small place. Did it work for you then? If not then there's your answer. I think you're just dreaming and aren't thinking this through logically.

Also don't do anything that means having to keep moving your children into different schools. It's really not fair on them to leave their friends and keep being unsettled just to appease your fantasy of living somewhere you can't afford!

IrritatedUser1960 · 17/08/2017 21:55

You will soon get sick of it and wish you had a bigger house, the kids will hate it.
I spent 10 years in a tiny two bed house with just me and my son and we both hated it. When I was finally able to afford a big three bedroomed house we breathed a sigh of relief.
At the very least you need three bedrooms and two bathrooms or it will be awful.

EezerGoode · 17/08/2017 21:57

You hate where you live..you think you can manage in a smaller place..you think you need to be in a more busy place..you you you....are you single op?.... oh hang on 3 kids ....sounds like it suits them to stay where they are.

Sunshinegirl82 · 17/08/2017 22:00

In the nicest possible way OP I expect lots of people are living in places that are a bit of a compromise, I know I am!

If I could choose I'd be living much nearer my parents in leafy Surrey. Over their way I could afford a 1 bed flat. So I'm 30 miles away in a 3 bed house. Perhaps circumstances will change to enable us to move there someday but I suspect we'll all be too settled here by then to bother.

There is quite a lot of middle ground between zone 2 London and suburbia. I'd do a few day trips and check some places out. I think deep down you know this house is too small or you wouldn't be here asking the question.

Original poster

sobigle · 17/08/2017 22:05

Yes you're right Sunshine, I'm a bit stamping my feet and saying it's not fair when actually I have lots of choices and am really lucky.

Really appreciate everyone's views and feedback.

OP posts:

Sunshinegirl82 · 17/08/2017 22:10

If you give people an idea of your budget and the bit(s) of London you want regular access too I'm sure people can come up with some good options to check out. If you can buy a 2 bed in zone 2 I'm sure your budget will give you loads of options.

Cherrytart6 · 17/08/2017 22:19

How much do you want to spend and where do you want to live? I recon it could work if you could fiddle with the floor plan

Original poster

sobigle · 17/08/2017 23:31

Ok thanks - 700k budget, need access to the west end

OP posts:

Sunshinegirl82 · 18/08/2017 08:55

So Charing Cross and Waterloo are probably your best bets for overground stations. Guildford connects to Waterloo (fast train) and for £700k you could get a 3/4 bed within a mile of the station. I don't know Tunbridge Wells as well but trains go straight to Charing Cross.

MyLittlePickleBoo · 18/08/2017 09:04

OP, why don't you get in touch with channel 4. They're always looking for house hunters for Location Location Location. Phil and Kirsty will sort you out!

badmgr · 18/08/2017 10:37

Agree with Sunshinegirl - Guildford is a great choice

lozzylizzy · 18/08/2017 10:46

I moved because I was having a third! When the kids are older we are doing the loft so the boys can have it partitioned off again and the box room housing the stairs so they have more space!

I don't know about anyone else's kids but mine fight nearly every day at some point and that in a tiny house would be bad!!!!

DontTouchTheMoustache · 18/08/2017 10:49

In the nicest possible way OP you are being quite selfish wanting to stay where you are. I grew up room sharing and in cramped conditions and only have miserable memories of it. If you can afford a nice, spacious home it would be very unfair not to go for that.

Wormulonian · 18/08/2017 11:35

Of course it is fine - you will be happier so the DC will benefit from that. 3 DC can sleep in the biggest bedroom and you and OH in the smaller room. You could use the 2 beds for the DC and you and DP sleep in the living room (decent sofa bed or a roll up futon). Lots of people live in London like this. We lived in Tokyo years ago with 4DC in a tiny one bed - the DC loved it - it was really cosy. There was very good storage built in and we were ruthless about clutter.

You could try to buy a flat with "potential to expand" (usually a Victorian or Edwardian conversion) into the loft or out into the garden.

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