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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Chicken Pox diemma

136 replies

519888888z · 13/08/2017 15:48

Would really appreciate some advise. DS1 has chicken pox (spots started to appear Friday pm). We are meant to be flying to US on Sunday to visit family. Postponed trip as he was ill last time! Hopefully his spots will have crusted over and he won't be contagious by Sunday. Problem is DS2 who hasn't had chicken pox and isn't showing any spots. Dilemma is a) might he already be contagious - don't want to put anyone on flight at risk. b) supposing he became ill while away and we couldn't fly home. We are going for one week only and DH and I both have to be back for work. Is it reasonable or an over reaction to cancel trip because of possible chicken pox? Any advise greatly received. Finding this very stressful. Lost a lot of money last time (insured but excesses, admin fees, etc) not that this is of course the main issue.

OP posts:
Genghi · 14/08/2017 06:51

I agree with sazza. You would be really selfish and ignorant to expose someone else to chicken pox.

Changednamesorry · 14/08/2017 06:57

please don't risk it. for the reasons already stated. pregnant women and the immuno suppressed.

welshweasel · 14/08/2017 07:09

Discuss t with your insurance. Personally, if all spots crusted and the other one is asymptomatic then I'd go. In fact, the insurance company may well not allow you to cancel.

Scottishgirl85 · 14/08/2017 07:37

I have a very recent experience of this. I would strongly recommend you get a doctor note for your child who has it now. Book an appointment now for the day before you fly, so doctor sees him as close to the flight as possible. Even if the spots have clearly crusted, if an airport staff stops you, you will NEED a letter. For your other child, if no spots I would go. You can't put your life on hold and she may not catch it. There is a risk you could get stuck over there if she develops them whilst you are there, but there is always a risk of something happening whilst abroad, so make sure you have good insurance. If she develops them before Sunday, then of course don't go.
My daughter's spots fully crusted after about 10 days. The spots come in waves with later batches coming a few days after the first appeared. However her spots were visible for several weeks, hence the importance of a medical note.
Another important thing, sorry if already mentioned, but the US get freaked out by chicken pox, they are vaccinated for it over there, so it's rarely seen. Hence the importance of a medical note. Good luck, I really feel for you x

Original poster
519888888z · 14/08/2017 10:21

Thanks everyone. Think I am going to cancel the trip. Really don't want to put anyone at risk.

OP posts:
HiJenny35 · 14/08/2017 10:35

My daughter is visually impaired because I caught chicken pox when I was pregnant because a parent wanted to take their child to the park because he had be 'stuck inside for days' and me and my other child played with him for over an hour before the mother told us (all spots were on the trunk).
I do hope parents wouldn't 'sneak a child on and hope that no one saw the spots' as this is beyond selfish. Do people not think about people with serious illness or in treatment for things like cancer. Unless the spots were totally crusted over and your other child was showing no signs at all I wouldn't go. And yes if get a certificate because if I was waiting to board a plain and a family had a child with obvious chicken pox spots I'd ask the boarding crew to check for a safe to fly certificate.

welshweasel · 14/08/2017 10:45

Totally unhelpful now but I do wonder why more people don't vaccinate their kids to avoid exactly this problem!

WutheringTights · 14/08/2017 10:56

Maybe look into a private chicken pox vaccine. Both of my older ones are vaccinated and number three will have it in a couple of months. Where we are (North West) it's £97 per dose and they need two. We worked out it was cheaper than us needing potentially weeks off work unpaid if they all got it consecutively.

ittakes2 · 14/08/2017 11:07

There are some very sad pox stories here. It's such a shame - the world health organisation recommends countries vaccinate their children for chicken pox and both America and Australia do - unfort the UK has chosen not to make this investment.

Utini · 14/08/2017 11:09

I would try and get DS2 vaccinated, today if possible. Vaccination soon after exposure seems to be quite effective in preventing chickenpox.

www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmedhealth/PMH0011216/

lozzylizzy · 14/08/2017 11:15

Another thing to consider is that when my DS1 (then 6) caught chicken pox he had a temperature of 40 degrees for a whole week! He was really really poorly with them. He barely lifted his head from his pillow. My younger two got them two weeks later and they were just spotty.

As well as compromising other people's health on the flight etc, you may well end up with a burning up child which would frankly make your holiday miserable!

worridmum · 14/08/2017 11:29

Yes you can and would be refused to fly if your child still had visable spots (even if crusted over) without a letter.

I had the 'plesure' of being behind a family that had put make up on their children in an attempt to cover the spots it was not a pleasent experience as the parents kicked off massively when they were denied boarding.

GreatFuckability · 14/08/2017 11:55

i would go as long as no one is showing any signs of it when you fly. you can't put your life on hold in case a kid has pox.

notevernotnevernotnohow · 14/08/2017 12:38

For those saying don't go, would they really cancel a trip if their child had been exposed to but had zero signs of chicken pox? Would they stay inside?
So if children in your kids room at nursery had come out with the pox but yours hadn't, would you stay indoors in case they were contagious?

AngeloMysterioso · 14/08/2017 12:44

I've never had CP, and I know I'd be seriously pissed off if I caught it from a kid on a plane whose parents knew he could be contagious and flew with him anyway.

FuzzyCustard · 14/08/2017 12:53

For all those who are saying "but if you did this you'd never be able to go anywhere" that is the reality for my DH and I. We can't be sure there aren't people around who think infection doesn't matter, so we have stayed away from people for the past year and will have to continue doing this for some long time to come.

If everyone was more concerned about spreading infections, perhaps we wouldn't have to be so hyper-vigilant.

OP, thank you for making a good decision.

welshweasel · 14/08/2017 13:26

But we all get exposed to lots of different infections every day. Unless you have symptoms there's no need to put life on hold. You wouldn't stop the sibling of a child with chicken pox from going to school for two weeks would you? I can understand cancelling because you don't want to take the risk of being stuck abroad if the other one gets it but it would be entirely reasonable to go.

FuzzyCustard · 14/08/2017 18:13

And most people have an immune system that copes with infections. But some people do not. And common infections kill them.

welshweasel · 14/08/2017 18:15

Yes I appreciate that and imagine that it makes life really difficult for you. But surely you're not suggesting that anyone who has been exposed to chicken pox quarantines themselves for 3 weeks just in case they get it?

LittleOwl153 · 14/08/2017 18:22

I would call your insurance, and follow their advice.
So many here saying don't go, but if the insurance won't pay out as they would potentially be fit to fly what do you do?

notevernotnevernotnohow · 14/08/2017 18:25

And most people have an immune system that copes with infections. But some people do not. And common infections kill them

This is very true. And my child could, for example, have contagious chicken pox without any outward signs and pass it on to you, which would be awful. But I can't stay at home every time my child may have come in to contact with someone who may have chicken pox (or any other illness).
It's just not possible.

swingofthings · 14/08/2017 18:30

Of course OP shouldn't fly if she thinks there is evidence of infection, but surely you can't stop living because of something you may or may not have. After all, if the flight have been a week ago and DS could have infected the whole plan not having a clue.

PotteringAlong · 14/08/2017 18:32

And most people have an immune system that copes with infections. But some people do not. And common infections kill them

Yes, yes they do. But by that reasoning then we should all stay indoors all the time - 2 of my 3 have had chicken pox, one hasn't. We've been out to a big children's attraction today. There will have been people there incubating chicken pox whose parents didn't know. The little one will possibly have been exposed. Should I really keep him in for 2 weeks just in case?

If the spots are crusted over and the little on earth shows no sign then go.

FuzzyCustard · 14/08/2017 18:36

I think if you have been exposed to cpox then it would be very sensible not to go anywhere where you might spread those germs to the unknowing. So I am less bothered about schools (since those with no immune system want be going there anyway) but aeroplanes (where the air is recirculated) or cinemas or cafes or indoor events with lots of people...well, that would be nice if you avoided those.

Butttons · 14/08/2017 18:42

I am shocked at the posts encouraging the OP to travel if there are no visible signs.

Chicken pox can be incredibly serioud to pregnant women, the very young and immune-compromised people. Why you would risk infecting someone for the sake of "not putting your life on hold" is beyond me. It's not like having a cold.

As someone who has experience of having an immune-compromised family member please reconsider your plans

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