Weird Neighbours

[User02]

I have some ongoing problems with the neighbours. They are older but not aged. They have made their privacy an important issue but they are the most curious and nosey people I have ever met.
When children are playing out in the garden they will sit on chairs facing my garden. The fence is criss cross so movement of people can be seen. They will stand at a point where they can see into the garden here. Things can be heard too.
They used to comment on what they could see but now I avoid any conversation.
I have had work done and workmen have even mentioned being looked at. I have since decided that where possible I do not invite people to the house whether social or business.
This is no way to live. Had they been ordinary neighbours they would have had more information like a conversation in passing, I am going shopping, to my brother's house or whatever. Due to the extreme curiosity I try not to let them know anything. They do not co-operate with any neighbours but I have not seen this amount of noseyness towards other people.
AIBU to expect to be able to live in my house without all this strange stuff.

Can you add some climbing plants to block off the area or some bamboo/rush type screening ?

If you squeeze a spot you might end up with an infection that leads to scarring. I'd use TCP if I were you

Sorry. Wrong thread.

If you squeeze a spot you might end up with an infection that leads to scarring. I'd use TCP if I were you

?

First of all, I'd suggest you get some sort of fence/trellis on your side so they can't see directly into your garden.

Secondly, while I find it incredibly weird when people are openly nosy like that, and I can understand why it bothers you, this is really no reason not to invite people to your house. They can only see into your garden, not into your house, for a start. And if they can hear you chatting in your garden, what are they actually going to learn that could be harmful to you?

I totally get why you find it horrible: I hate nosy people and people who stare or eavesdrop. But I think you need to rise above this and carry on as if they weren't there.

What do you mean when they say they 'used to comment on what they could see'? Do you mean they would try to talk to you when you were in the garden? Or do you mean they'd talk to each other about what you were doing?

They sound like complete and utter weirdos. Block them out as much as you can. I'd personally probably take Wellysocksbox's advice as it will probably turn out to be the most useful given in the whole thread

Part of me wonders if you're my next door neighbours as the neighbours the other side of her (my next door but one) are horrific and stand at an angle in the front garden so they can stare directly into her house (thankfully she's got blinds up now to stop that) but they stand and stare at all sorts and know the streets business - and comment long and loud on it all. They're ridiculously creepy! It's not easy, I sympathise!

I would try and screen off all avenues of sight where possible and cut them dead in the street - it's how we all deal with next door but one (seriously - they will stand and stare and watch everything - stand at back bedroom windows to watch you in the garden, stand and stare in the garden at young children playing - come and stand and look in your boot at what you've bought - and that's just the mild stuff.

The fence is criss cross so movement of people can be seen. They will stand at a point where they can see into the garden here. Things can be heard too

Wickes have this screening at half price, easy to attach and your privacy will be much better.
www.wickes.co.uk/Wickes-Reed-Garden-Screening-2-x-4m/p/187762?CAWELAID=120135120000011559&CAGPSPN=pla&CAAGID=47022526711&CATCI=pla-305242512892&gclid=EAIaIQobChMIpq2EhOrS1QIVJb7tCh0XLw5CEAQYAyABEgK2KPD_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds

Can't do anything about them hearing your conversation unless you all sit in your garden and text each other.

Only allowed to have plantings, hedges and fences to 2 metres height here and from upper windows and the far end of their garden being higher than mine they could still see. The boundary fence which they would have to pay half should be renewed but they will never pay for a proper job. They need to stop being nosey but how that would be achieved I just do not know,
I want to move but the family are not happy with that. I am here alone (apart from kids) most of the time.

Thanks for your response.

Only 2 metres high is fairly standard.

Could you put a sign where they can see it saying 'please stop being so nosey'. If they say anything then just tell them it's for a school project or some shit then point out that is they hadn't been being nosey it would be a problem.

Also, I've squeezed a million spots without infection or scaring.

They did used to talk to me and told me the things that they saw. They saw a relative in a certain place and asked if they live there now. They saw something being delievered and asked why I had ordered that, They asked what was in the shed which is not beside them, It creeps me out and makes me worry about what they do in the night. They were once found in the back garden staring in the slit between the blind and window ledge about 10.30 or 11.00 pm.

Could you put some sort of screen up like one of those folding screens that can be used in a bedroom ect so that it will block the view if they are looking from a certain angle, I'd also certainly put some cheap and or temporary barrier up on the fence higher than 2m if needs be, if told it's too high I'd simply state the reason why.

I have looked at the Reed garden screening and that looks very effective. Very reasonably priced too. I will try to find that locally so that I can have materials at hand to be ready if I find a workman to make a fence. Thank you for that information
I am so glad that you have confirmed this is a bit strange. I did wonder if it was me. I have also heard the man shouting and swearing at the woman and I would not be surprised if he is a bit of a bully.

High (opaque) fences, makes for great neighbours.

My mother told me that years and years ago, she was right.

So my house has that. And touch wood neighbours on both sides are great.

Privacy is something the rich and famous crave. (sometimes!), and I've got it right here, right now.

You cannot put a price on privacy in your own back garden ever. Best of luck OP.

If they are on your property and staring into your home at night then call 999.
After all, you didn't know it was them, ( you can say to them I mean if you have to.)

Gosh do you live in my old house?
I lived next door to an elderly couple like that a few years ago. He would shout at his wife and the two of them, often with their creepy nephew, would stand in their garden and stare into my garden and into my home. They used their garden shed as a watching point, waving at me while I glared at them. At one point they started posting notes through my door telling me what they had seen me doing.
The nephew would stand at my front window staring into my home.
I had to get police involved at this point.
Have you asked them to stop?

Also get the inexpensive bamboo screening suggested up thread.
Plant something screening...bamboo, people will give you some roots if you ask.
And in revenge, a large trampoline, a large barky dog, pay the children to be noisy , invite loud friends, host kids parties , singe stuff on the barbecue.

I would wait until they were in their garden and I knew they were listening and start talking - I would talk about them and what nosey wierdo's they are. I would talk about how people who listen into conversations never hear any good about themselves. I might throw in about ( unintelligible name) had been talking about them and what this ( fictional ) person said about them. Or maybe I would make them feel uncomfortable because I'm a bitch and nobody would make me feel uncomfortable or a prisoner in my own home. Give them some of the same treatment back!!
In all seriousness, good luck because bad neighbours can make you miserable.

I had an elderly neighbour like this. We put up a higher fence on our side as it was wait height down the bottom, and when it was windy she damaged it so it fell down. I knew it was here because it had effectively been pulled out and battered with something so even putting it back in wouldn't fix it.

If you can try and blot them out I would. We never had an actual dispute with ours but moved house after being there only 1.5 years. Extremely happy in our new place, use the garden every day and life feels transformed. Nosey people can trash your enjoyment of your home.

User2 I take it you're nowhere near Suffolk? I have quite a lot of reed fencing left over from or initial attempt to block our neighbour out before we moved!

Thank you to every one who has written here. I am going to get the bamboo reed fencing and have that put up in the back garden between them and my house.
I am many many miles from Suffolk Florence but thanks for the offer.
It surprises me and disgusts me that so many people have trouble with strange neighbours.

I have spoken to Social Services about this constant looking at family children every time they play in the garden but they say I am doing a good job of protecting them so they will do nothing.
I have spoken to Police about this extreme noseyness but they say this is not ilegal. They apreciate that it is not what they would want in their lives but they cant do anything about it.

The neighbours told me they were swingers and when I told Police that they said that could shine a light on the strange behaviour.
I am now going to see a solicitor this coming week. The neighbours have trees well over 40 ft in height and that is not allowed they have also built over the services into the house and that is not on either. If I sell the house I dont want any bad marks on the survey. I had a survey on a house I like and the proximity of high trees was mentioned as a bad point on the survey.
I will get the bamboo fencing. I dont think there is a Wickes near here but there must be other stockists.
Thanks again to you all