To feel down about everything?

[Gezzagirl]

I lost my dad at Christmas to cancer, have exchanged today on his house, no more visiting him with the children. It's reminding me of loosing my mum also to cancer 17 years ago she didn't even meet my children. Watching them both suffer has been awful.

I moved in with my long term partner 2 years ago, moved towns moved the kids schools, they are happy met some good friends but I feel in amoungst his family, his friends, no local friends of my own, no mum or dad , no grandparents for my children, my dp has his mum who worships her grandchildren and sons but there's obviously not the same bond for my children or me. Her son can do no wrong even when he stayed out all night and didn't tell me were he was. Dp can be snappy with my dcs and I don't like it.

I used to be a size 8 but now a size 12, put on 2 stone, my hair gone thin, I feel ugly 😤

I'm so sorry for your losses. This must have been an incredibly difficult time for you. It's OK to feel grief and a milestone like selling the house is likely to bring feelings up to the surface again. How old are your children? Do you work? (Not digging just wondered if you're able to meet friends through children's activities or school drop off). It can take time to make friendships and if you're not feeling good its difficult to reach out to others. Keep talking here OP.

Is there a local slimming club or exercise class you could try? If that's your thing, I mean. Size 12 isn't massive though and I'm sure you look lovely xx

Oh op you have been through a horrible time...no wonder you feel so low.

I am so sorry for the sad loss of your dear dad.

Please be kind to yourself you are grieving and it will take time to feel ok.

Hugs

I've met lots of people through various things but they've not really turned into friendships. TBH it doesn't usually bother me that much and I know I could make more of an effort with these people if I wanted, it's just were I am emotionally now I suppose. Now I have no parents it feels odd, I feel envious of my dp as he has his family around him. I do have a sister but she doesn't live locally, we chat on the phone we text each other but I can't pop round when I want. I feel kind of alone. I've also had a cancer scare of my own still getting regular check ups that's caused issues too. Is this all grieving ?

I don't have personal experience of grief but would imagine it makes you want a support network to lean on. What you are feeling sounds normal. Don't be hard on yourself- take time to come to terms with what's happened. My DH isn't very chatty so I've been forced to make friends to have social contact. If I don't see friends for a while I feel down so I can relate a tiny bit. Take care OP.

My dad lived at that house for quite some time, I visited him with the children every summer and other holidays (he lived 200 miles away) this year is the first time I'm not going up to visit, it feels strange. No more trips to the fair with him and the kids, no more days out with him, no more deep and meaningful conversations with him when the children went to bed! We've done the right thing selling it as we have to pay council tax on it etc . But part of me wants to keep it there so I can visit sometimes. That's really silly isn't it?! The new buyer is a first time buyer, I didn't want to meet her really we've let the estate agents deal with it really. I feel envious of dp so I can't talk to him, he knows I'm not myself though .

Im sorry for your losses, but I'd be concerned at ur dp s attitude to your children. Very snappy, concerningly so, following their grandfathers death?

Well I'm concerned about it regardless of whether they've lost their grandad or not! I'm reassessing my whole life at the moment. Does grief does that too ?