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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To give up on dating

19 replies

Rosiejim · 10/08/2017 12:38

I am OLD. I'm 33, I'm getting worried. My ex broke up with me a year ago and I'm still pretty gutted.

I've been OLD for a few months and yesterday I met up with a (really good looking) man after a couple of weeks chatting. The date was so strange. It's made me feel so depressed.

The date started badly when we went to a bar and he refused to get a drink. No booze, no water, no coffee. He stood by me as I bought a glass of wine and then watched me drink it.

One of the first things he asked me was whether I have any plush toys..I said no, he proceeded to tell me about his stuffed pig Wagner who eats lots of chocolate. He then spoke about homes under the hammer for a bit (ages). And finished by telling me what he eats every day...burrito Monday, gnocchi Tuesday, toast Wednesday and toast Friday etc. He was annoyed when I mentioned salad Sunday later as I got that wrong.

I mean, he wasn't a bad guy but he didn't ask me a single thing about myself and just talked and talked.

The last date I went on I left after one drink as the guy was very, very rude to the bar staff.

I give up. How do you meet someone other than OLD?!?

OP posts:
Magicpaintbrush · 10/08/2017 12:42

Oh dear, they don't sound like keepers. But there are literally billions of men on this planet and they are only two of them. Don't give up. Either the online dating will work out eventually or you will meet someone anyway in real life, but you may as well carry on with the OLD in the meantime. It is disappointing to look forward to meeting somebody only for them to turn out to be a self obsessed nob head, but there are bound to be some decent men out there, could be the next one you meet in fact.

NotSuchASmugMarriedNow1 · 10/08/2017 13:53

I found both my hubbys in the pub it's a cliche but there are always loads of single men there what's your local like?

ShatnersWig · 10/08/2017 14:03

After two dates? I could understand giving up after 100s.

I would like to give up on dating but it's given up on me. I haven't had a date in almost 6 years. Been on and off OLD in that time, currently back on but only found 3 women I wanted to message. No replies, so....

rainbowbreeze123 · 10/08/2017 16:47

You dont sound ready for dating tbh.. do you know anyone through friends, work colleagues anyone like that ? I got back in touch with someone I used to work with in the past and 8 years later were still together :)

Rosiejim · 10/08/2017 17:06

Oh god, it's not two dates. More like 10? The one guy I liked had 5 or 6 dates) slept with me and then ghosted me.

OP posts:
TripleASays · 11/08/2017 11:47

I totally understand how you feel OP! I live in hope though. Keep up the online dating- the right one might be out there!

nowwheredidmyunicorngo · 11/08/2017 12:16

Sorry I feel for you OP but your post made me ROFL. A stuffed pig, honestly?

As PPs have said maybe try different ways of meeting guys. Can you take up something that lots of men go to? Trucks or fishing or something?!

Also maybe try different OLD sites?

ambereeree · 11/08/2017 12:28

OLD is really hard work. What about through work or friends of friends? Do you live in a busy city where people go out for drinks after work?

VladmirsPoutine · 11/08/2017 12:32

It's hard work and often you're left wondering why you even bothered. I've been there before and tbh I mainly stayed just for the stories.
Keep at it. And cast your net further afield. It's not easy but if you're wanting to meet someone then I'm afraid you're going to have to take the rough with the smooth.

Rosiejim · 19/02/2020 21:04

Oh wow. I just found this thread. About 3 months after I posted this I met someone on tinder and yesterday (slow burner - I don’t rush) we agreed to move in together.

Can’t believe I forgot about Wagner Shock

OP posts:
FlapAttack23 · 19/02/2020 21:10

Haha congratulations OP 🥳🥳 that’s a nice ending!! What does OLD mean by the way

Rosiejim · 19/02/2020 21:13

Wine yes! Thank you. I was so sad at this time (wasn’t over my ex after a really bad break up) thought I’d never feel happy again. It’s crazy to think how different things are now.

OLD - online dating!

OP posts:
FlapAttack23 · 19/02/2020 21:28

Ah I am happy for you!!! I did laugh about your date though 😂😂 the meal days especially 😂

SidneyPrescott · 19/02/2020 21:37

I'm disappointed there are no Wagner updates.

Popc0rn · 19/02/2020 21:47

Happy it worked out for you OP Smile

Blackandgreenteas · 19/02/2020 21:52

Congratulations OP and thanks for the update!

That’s funny as I was thinking about giving up on the whole idea but maybe I’ll give it another whirl!

Thebishopofbanterbury · 19/02/2020 22:13

So happy for you op, that's great news..glad there are some OLD success stories!

PumpkinP · 20/02/2020 00:36

Oh wow totally thought this was a recent thread till I seen your update. Congrats!

Rosiejim · 20/02/2020 00:52

Thank you Flowers

OP posts:
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