AIBU to be feeling sorry for myself?

[DoubleCarrick]

How do you pick yourself up when you're feeling battered? I feel shit lately and am really struggling to pick up and carry on.

This past month has been a bit of a mess for both me and dh. I'm pregnant, the baby is going through a tough pain in the arse time, dh is shutting his business down, he's just started his new job but it won't pay the bills so I need to get out to work quick smart. Just.... everything.

The house isn't awful but feels grubby and untidy (don't think it is but that's my current perception), I'm struggling to stay on top of stuff and am not even motivated to get myself sorted out.

Guess I'm just feeling a little overwhelmed by all the changes going on

The house isn't awful but feels grubby and untidy (don't think it is but that's my current perception), I'm struggling to stay on top of stuff and am not even motivated to get myself sorted out

Can you get a company in to do a deep clean?

Firstly don't worry about the house. I've been there myself while suffering with depression/anxiety thinking, this needs doing, got to clean this. It's an added stress at a time you don't need especially when you have no motivation.
Set yourself a goal 'today I'm going to do some washing'
Don't try and do everything all in one go because if you don't manage it it makes you feel worse.
Things are much easier to cope with separately.
You need to take some time out for yourself and try and relax. It's easier said that done I know but instead of worrying about multiple things focus on what you can do instead.
The money issue will you be better when the baby arrives with tax credits?
Perhaps look at some work you can do at home or sell stuff you don't want anymore for some extra money.
It's really hard but I learnt in cbt when you're worrying about something think about it like this 'is there anything I can do right now?'
Yes? great do it
No? then put the worry aside for now as it's not something you can change.
Lastly if you have a bad day don't beat yourself up, what you haven't achieved today you can tomorrow or the next.

Do you have any time yourself? Can you book a massage or perhaps have a day at a spa? I find self-care helps, and the caring touch of somebody else can work wonders.

super I think you're right. Where I'm finding things tough it just feels a whole lot worse than it is. I've tried to do a little organising this morning and have actually done the basics straight away which I have really been neglecting! I was finding I would get to lunch and have to clean the highchair from breakfast before DS could eat.

I'm lucky, DH is great and will take DS to give me a break any time I want or need. I'm going away next weekend but DH has an interview this weekend about 90 minutes away which includes a written assessment so I think he'll be gone for most of the day saturday.

We're going out for a drink tonight (for the first time since before ds was born - too many health issues to leave him before that). He's 7 months now so it feels long overdue. lounge I'll paint my toenails and straighten my hair!

We don't really have any spare cash at the moment as our outgoings are about to exceed out income and we have no room to cut anything back as we're both already pretty frugal.

I don't really understand why but our claim for tax credits was turned down. Our joint income for last year was about 16k dh had a bad business year and I hardly worked as I was so ill in pregnancy and we have one DS. We worked over the minimum hours between us so I don't really get it. We do manage with a budget and financially we're ticking over.

I don't particularly think I'm feeling anxious. I've been stressed but circumstances mean that stress has been pretty inevitable. Things are all but resolved now and I need to pull myself out of this fog.

My mum gave me £30 yesterday when she came to visit so as soon as DS wakes we'll go into town and I'll buy a new top for my drink out with DH tonight. I can wear it when I'm away next weekend too then.

Long post. Massive brain dump! Sorry

I find that when one thing goes wrong everything does. I then get into a vicious circle and feel that I can't cope with anything. I always focus on my house as well for some reason and cannot see what is right with it, only what is wrong and everything builds up until I think I hate my house and I am moving (bit dramatic I know).

Try and take a step back and look at each thing in isolation if you can.

It already sounds as if you are looking for the positives which I find is half the battle.

I think if I were to post this two days ago it would be a different story. Today I'm ready for change. I'm fed up of all the shit of this past month. It can't be good for my pregnancy and I worry that I'm going to grow a fussy baby because of the stress I've been feeling