Son getting phonecalls

[chitofftheshovel]

So a bit of background first.

DS is 12 and just finished year 7. For most of the year he hung out with the same two boys, x and y. Towards the end of the school year DS became friends with some other people. At first there was no big fallout between DS, X any y they just weren't the close 3 they had been. But then x took a dislike to DS's new friends, slagged them off and DS stood up for them. I think they had a physical fight, to me this is both of their faults and I admonished my son for it.

Now x has phoned DS twice this holiday. First time from a withheld number, with another child in the background. X told DS nobody liked him and he has no friends. Then today x rang DS again and called him a twat, said no one likes him etc.

DS is actually ok about it, quite philosophical, has said he could block him but then x would think he was getting to him.

I think it's properly nasty behaviour, but I'm not sure what to do about it. DS doesn't want me to do anything. DSis thinks I should ring/text mum asking to meet and sort it out between the 4 of us. I'm more tempted to text her asking her to ask x to stop phoning DS, but don't want to go behind DS's back. Not really an aibu, more of a wwyd?

I would ring the mum.

If your son can handle it let him handle it but be there for him. Let him know that you are there if he cant. I think 12 is the age where you kind of how whether you will take it or whether you say fuck off I don't care. It all depends on your son's view on this now keep talking x

At 12,no I really wouldn't. Your ds sounds sensible enough,just keep an eye on it.

I would ring the mum. Kids can change friends - they don't deserve abuse for it. If my son were doing this I'd be very angry and want to know about it.

If it carries on though ring the mum

Don't go behind his back - he may not trust you and tell you things in future. Just support him in being resilient about this. Boys seem to be very argumentative at this age. They could be friends again come September

DS sounds like he's handling it. I'd tell him you are happy to step in and to let you know if he needs it, but let him stand on his own two feet if that is what he's asked you to do.

Just to add... if it continues explain to your son that the behaviour is unacceptable and an adult clearly needs to step in - then ring the mum but with your son knowing

Thanks everyone. We've had a good chat about it just now. I've basically said that if it happens again I'd like to get in touch with x's mum but that I would get his permission to do so. I think he can handle it at the moment but he does understand that if it escalates he might need some help. Bloody children can be so cruel!