WWYD? Over friendly messages from taken man

[violicorn]

Hi, NCed and some info is vague because it's identifying

Met a guy at at event on Saturday; he was there in a professional capacity, I wasn't. He tracked me down and started messaging me on instagram yesterday. Seemed funny, nice etc. Mentioned an ex from 4 years ago which is why he's moved to my area. Conversation definitely flirty.

After (a lot of) digging on the internet today, I've discovered that he has a toddler and is very much still with the mum (through other social media) - obviously beyond no longer communicating with him - should I say anything? He hadn't alluded to her or the child at ALL and there's no pictures on his instagram that suggest he's anything other than single. Interestingly she does follow him on there though....

Happy to just block and move on but am wondering WWYD?

I think if you attempt to discuss it with him you will come across as a bit stalker-ish.

Unless it is possible that you are mistaken about him being in a relationship I'd just ignore him.

Block and move on. Why even waste your head space trying to figure out what he's really up to? Sounds like a player.

Not him - her

TBH I'm pleased that I have such honed intuition and good detective skills. But I'm still disappointed. Oh well, at least I found out now

What would I do? I'd probably construct several unlikely scenarios to explain the toddler, its mother and their appearance on social media. Then I'd spend a few dates enjoying his company but trying to direct the conversation to that area to allow him to confirm my unlikely scenario, by which time I'd probably have fallen for him. Beyond that I can't predict other than it would all end in tears (mine, mostly).

You should follow your gut and move on!

Optimist - are you me???

I would block immediately. What a scum bag. Don't be silly and trick yourself into thinking you are special and he has singled you out because it's true love. Money is on him fancying a quick hook up no strings.

Ah optimist we are so similar. At one point earlier a friend and I were discussing the possibility of him having a twin...

If you're sure it's him, personally I would send a DM to the partner, with screen shots of the messages he's been sending you so that she can make her own mind up about whether or not to stay with the scumbag. Good dectective skills OP!

at twin, violi !

See I feel like if I was the partner I'd want to know (obviously)
But not sure if it's worth the potential hassle for me if I do message her..., selfish I know.
Surely I can't be the first woman he's done this to. The conversation flowed to naturally and in hindsight, his instagram is that of a 'single' man. Why else would that be?

He's a chancer looking for opportunist sex. I'd block & move on.

Block all contact or risk encouraging him.

Happened to me recently. Regularly mentioned the ex but not current partner. Did he think I wouldn't look at other social media when it's all in public domain? Forget him & move on... or if you are me choose your gym visit timings very carefully for the next few weeks!

Well done on your detective skills.

Would you fancy him if he were single? No reason, just curious.

Trills yes I would - that's why the conversation was able to get to the point it has - I thought he was!