DD is almost 3 years old.
From a young age (4 months) she has been extremely sensitive to environment, screaming in certain locations and was generally a high needs baby. My instinct has always told me there is something different about her in comparison to the many babies we spend time with (friends with babies, toddler groups, other children at nursery etc).
She currently struggles with the following:
Loud sounds, to the point we have to avoid certain situations and locations, such as certain soft plays with games / machines making sounds she is afraid of. She replays situations over and over again, for example once at a friend's house there was some drilling and it scared her- she refused to go back to that friend's house the following time and still talks now, many weeks later, about the drilling noise.
Dealing with change of environment, for example leaving the house or returning to the house, getting out of the car, suddenly doesn't want to go into her toddler music classroom for her weekly class, which she previously loved, as it's in a new location
Extreme separation issues, still screams at nursery drop off even though she has been attending three days per week for the last two years. Unable to deal with me being upstairs at home and stands at the bottom of the stairs screaming mummy and rattling the stair gate until I come back down (even if distracted by DH etc).
Unable to deal with having a new brother (I say 'new'- he's 9 months old!), still hates me holding him, showing him attention etc, not really improving even 9 months on.
Extreme sensitivity to others' feelings - examples would be immediately crying if she hears another child cry, getting really upset if a character in a cartoon she is watching cries.
It is exhausting for her and for us. My feeling is that all of these fears, anxieties etc are actually getting worse as she gets older, not better. We have tried many techniques to address, distract, reassure, pre-warn, get her involved with her brother etc.
My feeling is that she may have Sensory Processing Disorder and Separation Anxiety disorder. I feel we need to get her assessed by an OT.
DH thinks the majority of the above behaviour is within the range of 'normal' toddler behaviour and she will grow out of it. AIBU to press on with some kind of assessment?
Her speech seems to be developing normally and physically she has no medical issues.
Has anybody else had a toddler with these behaviours and any advice on how to handle it?