To ask what really fucks you off?

[IDoDaChaCha]

I know I know I was asking for it- going out in the car on a Sunday; 'Sunday drivers'... As I was sat/stuck behind yet another slow, overly cautious (shit - IMO) driver it infuriated me that she left a car sized gap between her and the car in front of her. These selfish twats idly trundle by just as the lights change leaving whoever was stuck behind them (and their massive unnecessary gap...) stuck at the lights. I curse them. What and/or who really gets you mad?

So many things. So many.

People who are always late, stealing my time.
Hypocrites.
Attention seekers.
Braggarts.
Knee jerk merchants.
People who talk too much, never listen.
Arrogant twats.
Bullshitters, particularly those who are not good at bullshitting.
People who get offended by everything which detracts from real issues.
Shallow twerps.

Camilla Parker Bowles

The food police. "Oh I couldnt possibly eat all that"by thin person. I always hear the unspoken "unlike you, you fat greedy bastard"

And worse "oh no. I never eat THAT much" by person who is equally as fat as me but who pretends to eat tiny bird like portions and shames me encourages me to do the same

DH putting on old episodes of Family Guy he's seen eleventy billion times & still sniggering at the shit 'jokes'.

Women who see other women as rivals.
Men who think women are not people.
People who make personal comments and assume you are deaf.
People who don't say thank you or acknowledge you if you hold a door open for them
Train commuters who would gladly kill you to get on the train before you
People looking at their phones walking down the street, who tut when they walk into you.

I'm a reasonably calm person but by God I can get road rage bigstyle! Can people not drive??! And don't get me started on anyone who talks on their phone/texts behind the wheel 😡
Litter droppers
Racism
People who treat staff in restaurants, shops etc like something on the bottom of their shoe
The huge unfairness of the world & all the preventable stuff that still happens to innocent people
My DH at times although a lot less nowadays!
Bloody stuff that you can't open without a huge bomb!
People who have kids then get the nanny to do everything - why?
The fact that I can't get a job
Cellulite!
Animal Cruelty

Cruelty to animals
Cruelty to children
People who use the name of Jesus as a swear word when they would shit themselves if they used the name of Mohammed! They are just useless and pathetic
Men who abuse women...hate them, loathe them...
I like to think Hell is filled with these men and I somehow think it is. I sometimes think Hell is like the internet....Where are all the women???

Anti-vaxers
Cyclists. I'm aware they're not all bad but they're a notoriously entitled bunch of wankers where I live.
Slug eyebrows - just revolting.
Pierced ears and/or hideous headbands on babies.

Really militant breastfeeders. Not just normal women who are happily breastfeeding their baby but the women who think formula is like letting your baby smoke crack.

People who let their kids chase/harass pigeons (or any animals for that matter!).

eugh
Yes
someone who might look like me may have released her inner fishwife @ a lady taking photos of her adorable darlings doing this recently "so cute aww"

My partner moaning about being tired.
Snoring.
Rude people.
Lazy people.
People who smoke around kids.
Entitled people.
Those who decide that a supermarket aisle is the perfect place for a catch up with friends. That's what coffee shops are for.
Buses that are late.
Buses that can only have 2 buggies on at any time.
My neighbours.
Having to repeat myself.
When some dj somewhere decides that every song that's released needs a dance version of it.
Two faced idiots.
Small minded idiots.
Unwarranted parenting advice from in laws.

My bedroom is two floors up above a cash machine and there's always a muppet that faffs around with it at daft o'clock. Also the beeping noise the ATM itself makes.

Ambulances and police cars that are looking for people/ a street and put the sirens on every time they change direction.

Silly bints who are so horrified by the idea of getting a single drop of rain on their hairdo that they step into a crowded train with their umbrella still fully open, very slowly closing it without moving in, seemingly oblivious of the fact that people are waiting behind them to get on said train - being covered in the rain they were so desperate to avoid a single fucking drop of 😡😡😡

People who beep you when you are trying to pull out of a junction onto a busy road. Why? How exactly does this help? Cunts.

Girls/women with long hair who toss their heads in close proximity so you get a faceful of their scratty hair.
People who call their children ridiculous or misspelt names.
Motorcyclists who reasonably expect you to look out for them but unreasonably think it's ok for them to weave in and out of traffic & are then surprised that you haven't seen them.
People who dawdle along the motorway but then view me overtaking them in my tiny car as a personal insult and speed up so I can't get past.
People who are ageist (so a large proportion of people on Mumsnet) - shrieks of horror if anyone makes racist, sexist, LGBGTist or any other -ist comments, but fine to use the word "old" as an insult. If someone old is behaving like an idiot, it is because they are an idiot, not because they are old.
People who call me "sweetheart" even in a kindly way (a surprising number considering my curmudgeonly manner!).
People who chat to the checkout operator after they have paid - you had your chance while you were unloading half the contents of Asda onto the conveyor.
Slow walkers.
People who imagine you have never done your job before and want to tell you how to do it.
People who walk along the pavement in groups when you are walking on your own towards them - there is only one of me, I can't split myself in two and I refuse to step into the road so you can continue your conversation.
People who get on a plane and then block the aisle faffing around putting their belongings away. JUST SIT DOWN so there will be some small chance of the plane taking off this side of eternity...
Students who obviously come from a town without cars because it comes as a surprise to them that walking out into the road without looking may be a dangerous activity.
I could go on....

Cold Callers do my head in!

What really fucks me off is kids shoe shopping on a Saturday during school holidays.

No you can't bloody try on every pair of shoes in the shop. Fucking hurry up. The kid that sat on the cube I was sitting on... move!!!!!

The ticket system! How am I in a queue of 10?! The slow staff. The staff in the adult bit doing NOTHING.

Ugly shoes anyway. £40 a pair! Jeez, mine cost less than that.

My toddler losing it after a 40 minute wait. Refusing to try on shoes. Bribes running out.

The ending "sorry we don't have that size that in stock"

People who speed down roads used as a rat run then smuggly pull out in front of the car they were behind before they took the "short cut." I always think was all that speeding and panicking really worth it to get one car ahead ? 🤔

People who say nom nom nom

People who say "Saturday night shenanigans" usually accompanied by a picture of themselves with friends (who you don't know) doing stupid faces on FB.

People who post pictures of their kids at the park on fb.

People who post on fb pictures of their 2 year old child with another 2 year old child with the caption "Lily with her bestie for life" Said children probably won't even play with each other in a couple of years as they move on with kids from school.

Cyclists who ride on the pavement and use pedestrian crossings so I have to stop because the fucking green man came on! Are you bloody kidding me?!

People who come back from holiday and make no effort to say they're back for days. Yes, dps, I'm talking about you. I don't know your schedule, no doubt I will now be treated as the world's worst dd when I phone tomorrow.

Thenewschmoo the anyfink/somefink rips my bloody knitting! I can't stand it and I presume the person is lacking completely in brains!

Someone call 999 MartinJD needs emergency surgery to remove the massive stick from their arse

MartinJD would not induce my rage if they would stop signing every post with"Best, Martin JD"

Just stop it. You remind me of that old bag bitch Pearl, from the Digital Spy forums. We can see your fucking name!!!

Cyclists (always men in Lycra) who do not use a cycle lane instead weaving on the road between cars and then hobbling like epic bellends waiting for the light to change trying to avoid taking their feet off the pedals with their arses in the air.

1. You're not Lance fucking Armstrong in Tour de France. There is no cheering crowd at the end of your commute. Get back into the cycle lane they blocked off the road to build for the last 4 months you entitled prick.
2. You just fucked off some drivers who I, another cyclist on my town bike in the bike lane, will have to swerve later as they pass their "all cyclists are wankers" anger on me even if I did fuck all wrong.

Anti-vaccers on my Facebook who post memes like "If vaccines work then why why do we still need vaccines" - get the fuck out of here, come back and fuck off again. Or antivaccers sharing bollocks about vaccines causing autism. As above.

Should of instead of should have

Phew - that was nice! Thank you OP.

People who say 'do you know what I mean' after every sentence - yes I do know - I'm not stupid nor dumb

People who litter - where I'm from it's illegal and punishable by fine

People who line up for coffee/tea at cafes and only look at the menu when they are at the till. For gods sake - the menu is above you in plain sight - honestly this winds me up no end.

People who don't move down train carriages 'because they are afraid they won't be able to comeback out at their stop' god knows what happened to their legs.

Inanimate objects that are meant to make life easier but don't do what they're supposed to. Computers that break, satnavs that suggest stupid routes, etc.

Ignorance and presumptuousness. People who offer unsolicited advice. Particularly on topics that they know next to nothing about.

Yy to cyclists, slow pedestrians and hesitant drivers who mistakenly think they are very safe drivers because they're being so slow.

Obese people. It hurts my eyes.

Smelly people on public transport. And people who don't give up seats for sick people/ elderly people/ children/ pregnant women. So rude.

Pubs or restaurants that think people only get hungry between 12 and 3 or after 6pm.

Cold callers.

Hay fever and colds. Having a blocked nose drives me insane because I can't sleep.

Wind/ rain/ UK weather in general. I hate being cold.

Everybody who voted for Brexit.

People who wait until they are on the bus to start looking for change, I saw you standing there for the past 5 minutes, the prices are on the bus stop, is it suddenly a massive fucking surprise that you're expected to pay for this journey?