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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Doctor's appointment

537 replies

10greenapples · 04/08/2017 12:03

I missed a drs appointment for my dd as I just wasn't going to make it on time. Anyway today I recieved a letter which says if one more appointment is missed she won't be allowed another one for 6 months! We can cancel an appointment but need to give an hours notice. So we will only be seen at the walk in if another is missed which is 8am-11am and a 2 hour wait. Aibu in thinking this seems pretty harsh?!

OP posts:

PutItOnYourPancake · 04/08/2017 16:11

Most of us have kids, love, and still manage to fulfil our responsibilities by arriving to places on time . Do you have a book of excuses you're getting all these from?! I've never seen so many all on one thread .

Delilah21D00LoT · 04/08/2017 16:12

Sorry OP but you are being unreasonable.

work in a GP Surgery and that amount of people who do not attend their appointments (for various reasons I'd imagine) is a joke!

Today, we had two GP's on. Each of those GP's had 18 pre-booked appts.

First GP had 8 patients not attend and the Second GP had 5 patients not attend.

Given how precious appointments are and how booked in advance they are this is horrendous, rude and selfish.
Those appointments could have been given to other patients.

Even if your surgery require an hours notice to cancel an appointment, I can assure you that they still would have appreciated a phone call from yourself to let them know the score - that's just common courtesy.

Those appointments can usually be re-used for emergency/urgent appointments.

They won't see you if your later than 15 minutes. There's signs up telling you that. So I wasn't going to waste my time.
So it's okay to waste the Surgery and GP's time? That's a bad attitude.

Surely as an Adult and a Parent it is your responsibility to ensure you have credit on your phone (a lot of contracts work out cheaper these days than credit).

paddlingwhenIshouldbeworking · 04/08/2017 16:13

Oh yes, urm no-one on Mumsnet has kids. Should have realised.

Its all manners and no kids here.

123MothergotafleA · 04/08/2017 16:14

In my experience no one has any respect for Dr.s appointments or indeed any NHS appointments. I believe it is because " they're free " and not seen as important.
NHS staff have been putting up with disrespect verging on abuse for many years now.
I heard of stories of Doctors ( and other disciplines) being cursed and sworn at, one being reduced to tears. Staff have very little support in these situations and I'm just glad that those who abuse the system by failing to show up for appointments are at least given some ultimatums.

Slimthistime · 04/08/2017 16:16

actually this just reminded me

my local surgery is very good

a neighbour once asked for a recommendation, so I recommended them

she said "Oh dear, that's where we are already, they are terrible, they have no consideration for the fact that we have children".

I never bothered asking what she meant but now I'm beginning to wonder.....

RortyCrankle · 04/08/2017 16:18

PassiveAggressiveFloofiness - a bit pathetic to make a Tory dig on a non political thread but I guess lefties are a bit desperate these days.

When I have a doctor's appointment I always aim to arrive at least ten minutes early. I know it's boring waiting for your appointment but I think it's basic manners not to be late for appointments. To not call them at all was very unreasonable.

Coconutspongexo · 04/08/2017 16:18

123 Drs are treated disgusting my mother is regularly told to 'fuck off home' (she's polish) by disgruntled patients. I've had abuse from patients (student medic) and I've seen receptionists screamed at! People think the NHS is there to be abused and it's arrogance like this that winds me up!

I don't know how anyone can use 'having a child/children' as an excuse for bad manners

ilovesooty · 04/08/2017 16:19

I don't expect she had any manners before she had children.

user1498911589 · 04/08/2017 16:21

So I have a landline why am I going to top up my mobile aswell.

Because your landline doesn't work in the car and there are times when you need to use it to ensure that you aren't being rude, selfish and inconsiderate. Running late for a GP appointment is one such time.

YABU and I think you know you are really.

NooNooHead1981 · 04/08/2017 16:22

The OP is clearly lacking in social awareness, manners, general common courtesy and an ability to plan ahead/think of others.

All of this is surprising given that she has a child; most people who have children you would hope would possess at least one of these skills. Otherwise, how the heck is the child going to learn?

Please in future OP, try and think ahead a bit more.

Get some emergency credit on your phone. Leave with 20 minutes extra in case of emergencies. Contigency plans are great, you know.

I am not that organised, but I do at least TRY and don't come up with a million excuses when something goes wrong. And I do at least apologise and admit resposibility too. It's called general respect.

Lesson learned, move on, next time phone to apologise.

Jaxhog · 04/08/2017 16:24

If going to the pharmacy was an option, why did you need a Doctor's appointment?

Original poster

10greenapples · 04/08/2017 16:24

I'm not getting emergency credit I would rather put that money on my electric. I just posted a thread about struggling finacially. It didn't get anywhere near as many comments! Guess it wasn't juicy enough for you all.

OP posts:

FoxesSitOnBoxes · 04/08/2017 16:25

You didn't know that saying sorry for missing an appointment was a thing?! Brilliant!
Well it is a thing. Of course it's a thing. It's what all the people with basic manners do.

Tubbyinthehottub · 04/08/2017 16:26

You don't know what would have happened if you'd turned up late and apologised. Maybe they could have seen you or at least if you'd explained the letter may not have been triggered. The one hour cancellation time refers to the next time you have an appointment, not this time when you were unavoidably late. Only they don't even know that because you didn't bother to let them know.

NooNooHead1981 · 04/08/2017 16:27

Yes, we understand you are financially not in a good place, but surely £5 emergency credit is better than another scenario like this? Even if you are so stony broke that it leaves you with less food or something for a day?

Crunchymum · 04/08/2017 16:29

Having kids is surely the most important reason you have credit on you phone???

SteppingOnToes · 04/08/2017 16:29

You can now make calls with WIFI by the way...

GladAllOver · 04/08/2017 16:31

Traffic delays are normal, and should be allowed for.
You should always plan to be there 10 or 15 minutes before the appointment time, so the doctor isn't sitting there waiting if you are delayed.
Definitely BU.

FlyingFox95 · 04/08/2017 16:31

How do people get this far in life without any social awareness

RedRose2003 · 04/08/2017 16:33

You were prepared to walk from the bus stop to the surgery when there was something in it for you, but not in order to apologise. And you couldn't even be bothered to pick up the phone afterwards to apologise. Your attitude is appalling.

ozymandiusking · 04/08/2017 16:36

At our surgery 3 missed appointments and you are removed from the list! (without notifying them) There is a national shortage of GPs and everyone is going to have to try and be reasonable and considerate with anything to do with the national health service.

Ditsy1980 · 04/08/2017 16:41

Your daughter couldnt have been ill enough to need a GP anyway if you didn't ring (I get the no credit thing) or just turn up late and either sit and wait or rebook.
Maybe next time you could just try the pharmacy first rather than waste everyone's time.

Original poster

10greenapples · 04/08/2017 16:41

It wasn't a traffic delay it was a major accident.

Anyway the people saying I need to get emergency credit are actually being ridiculous. I do not NEED emergency credit. My mum brought up 6 kids in the 80s with no mobile phone! I've been a parents for 7 years and have never once needed credit to make a call that wasn't to 999 or could wait till I got in! So stop being so ridiculous

OP posts:

Coconutspongexo · 04/08/2017 16:42

We're being ridiculous? Look at yourself

Btw a major road accident is still a delay to you

Floggingmolly · 04/08/2017 16:43

You didn't bother your arse making the call when you "got in".

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