To ask you to keep an open mind

[BishopBrennansArse]

Today I have yet again been given multiple evil looks for using a blue badge parking bay.

This is despite me being in my motability car, equipped with a hoist and it had my power chair in the boot.

I didn't use the chair today for two reasons - the first is that the place I was going was a very short distance from the parking bay and I'm able to sit down the entire time I'm here (hairdresser) and the second is that actually the hairdresser I visit has a step to get in anyway.

Usually I'm thick skinned and let it blow over me. Today for some reason I can't do that.

My rheumatoid arthritis and fibromyalgia are invisible yet under the skin my ankle has been eaten by my own immune system. I walk with a visible limp (and not that far, either). You can't really see my deafness unless I tie my hair back. My autism is also invisible. Yet the fact you can't see it doesn't mean it doesn't exist.

It seems every time I park in this particular car park all I get is evil looks.

I might be under 40 and have bright blue hair but so what?

I'm just so fed up, frustrated and miserable.

Ignore them, if you have a blue badge then you are entitled to use the spaces.

That sounds miserable. I'm sorry.

Are you happy with your hair?

Ah, OP, as well you know... Disabled people are:
Over 60 at least
Only allowed out at certain times of day
Not allowed out alone
Not able to drive
Not able to walk at all
Lack basic intelligence
Have nothing interesting to say.

At least, this is what you would think, based on how people respond.

I'm sorry you had a shit time. I am super jealous of your hair though. As soon as baby is born I will be down to the salon myself.

Regards
SLE "sufferer"

Sorry you're getting evils for using a spot dedicated for you. Honestly. I don't know why people do this. It says more about them than it does about you! Don't let it get you down

Hope you had a nice time at the hairdressers. And ps. LOVE your name x

You are not BU, of course you aren't. I can't believe people are so thick as to keep doing this to people like you. My good friend has MS and a blue badge. She is young looking and appears, from the outside, to be in good health. She often gets dirty looks and I have to bite my tongue not to say, yes, she is walking now, but pop back in twenty minutes and see if she's still walking - her ability comes and goes and certainly, by the time she's returning to her car, she will be in great pain and very unsteady - sometimes needing her sticks/chair. Also, some days she's ok until she has something to carry (e.g. shopping), then she can't manage. But people aren't interested in that, they just covet your parking space. They are ill-informed idiots.

Ta honeysuckle - helps to feel less alone
showofhands currently baking my colour top up... it'll be lush 😉

As an aside, dbro was at a wedding a few weeks ago. He's tetraplegic. He said afterwards he almost wishes they had announced to all that he was a perfectly typical adult with a job, hobbies and a social life, and please feel free to talk to him. Apparently the wary stares and avoidance of interacting with him at all were very depressing.

Aww that's sad. Must admit I do tend to get chatted to when in my chair - mainly about my hair!

Dicks. My terminally ill father got looked up and down for parking in a disabled spot (he has a blue badge now). I wanted to smash the fuckers face in.

So sorry you have to deal with this

My DD has an invisible disability and I often get tuts and comments when I'm coming out of the disabled toilets with her. So I know how horrible it is.

I get this sometimes. I now just stare straight back at them.

Small minded people that need to mind their own business.

I do too Piglet, normally.
Don't know why I can't today.

Frig 'em, miserable arseholes.

Bastards. I am 50s, upright, look very healthy. I have recovered well from a broken back. I could not risk being jolted on a bus or train. I get the evils for sitting in seats for the elderly or vulnerable. I have been asked to move. I am boldly and will ask someone nearby is they can release their seat for one of us.

Hold your blue bead high op x

Oh I'm so sorry Bishop.

I have a friend with a chronic and increasingly disabling condition (labelled "progressive" except it seems entirely REgressive in terms of my friend's life). They have a Blue Badge, DLA (or whatever it's called nowadays) and are waiting till they're wheelchair bound till they start with the hip replacements.

They work in a high-paying, high powered job and pay a lot of tax despite being in chronic pain.

Prejudice and assumptions SUCK.

I remember a few years ago my DH was waiting for a car to reverse out of the BB spot in a supermarket car park so we could park in it. The elderly passenger waved her blue badges at him while the car was manoeuvring.

Its horrible thinking everyone is watching and judging.

Do you get spectators when you use the hoist, I am thinking of selling tickets?

ahh, fuck'em.

I was going to say more, but I think that covers it!

Arseholes. I hope that your hair turns out FAB!

Wave your badge at them and say ''I dyed my hair to match, waddya think?!''

Purity oh yes. People find it fascinating, strangely.

You aren't doing anything wrong and you know that sod them. People get judgmental of people who don't have a blue badge parking in disabled spots and people without kids parking in parent and toddler parking bays, this happens so often that they have started to judge everyone as to their merits, its ridiculous. Just ignore them and if anyone says anything tell them to mind their own business.

It's shit isn't it? Ds has one because of his autism and we get stares and comments and numerous threats of being reported. Thankfully now I've developed a limp because of arthritis so I ham it up a bit when out with ds and suddenly it's more acceptable to Joe Public that we have a blue badge

People just love a good judgement of others even when they know very little about them. AIBU is definitely NOT immune to these people either.

It's really hard to ignore people judging you in the street as you go about your business because of their assumptions I know but they are the ones in the wrong.

I'm annoyed on your behalf OP not everyone does judge (I barely notice who is parked in which space ). I hope it hasn't made you feel too bad.

Oh, and your hair sounds great when mine was blue (quite a few years ago) it left the bloody dye all over my pillow. The dye has probably improved since then. Keep rocking the blue and a 'sod you' attitude to the judgemental ignoramuses out there.

Obviously YANBU. What I don't understand is why some people seem to care so much about other people having a right to disabled bays. I don't have a reason to need one - none of my business why someone else does.

Ta fucking dah.
Thanks for helping me feel a bit less shit.