AIBU to no longer know what a healthy diet looks like?

[iloveruby]

I'm just so confused about all the various diet / health information that I no longer know what is considered healthy, or how to plan my meals so that they are nutritious.

I suppose the background to this is that I'm about 4 stone overweight and have tried various diets to no success but in the process have become so confused about what I should or shouldn't be eating.

I no longer know what is the right choice. For example, the 5 a day message is simple but then fruit is considered too sugary and sugar is bad so does that then mean 5 a day is just veg?

Then there is the message to cut down on refined carbs and increase protein, but at the same time to consume less meat (one of my main protein sources).

Am I the only one who is confused and if not, what does a healthy diet actually look like?

I think you should eat what you currently eat but weigh and count calories to understand portion control. Did you know a portion of pasta is only 70-90g per person? It's a lot less than most people think and so even so called healthy people will eventually turn fat hence why so many natural born slim people get fat when they get older.

Only when you are comfortable on the restricted diet of what you normally eat and in the normal Bmi zone should you focus on healthy eating. This is a plan I have followed for 10 years and not only did I lose a lot of weight (5 stones), I have maintained it for years and that is the key. Maintenance.

Just about everyone on this thread by the way has the same view actually. Eat whole real food and eat fewer calories. Ditch cake etc. Now you might have porridge for breakfast like my vegan son or you might have eggs (like I do) but either way you are avoiding a processed food and also you do have to eat fewer calories. You can get fat eating how I do if you eat too much of it all although it's harder if you give up junk food.

Everything in moderation.

I have done every diet under the sun. They will all "work" in that if you stick to them you will lose weight, but I didn't keep the weight off nor deal with my weird relationship with food til I stopped dieting iyswim.

I just ate according to my appetite, I didn't cut anything out and I told myself nothing was off limits as long as I was actually hungry.

The weight has come off and stayed off.

If you think of people who are slim and have always been slim, they don't have a particularly "healthy" diet. They still eat white bread and ice cream. They just eat a wide variety of foods and most importantly, they know how to listen to what their appetites are telling them.

I have no health issues. Pushing 40, but blood pressure is low/normal, cholesterol is low, and I have PCOS so that's hard to do.

I lost weight when I started eating because I was hungry, rather than because I was bored or upset. It's so easy to just mooch around the kitchen scoffing myself because I've got nothing better to be doing, or because I was feeling upset & was seeking comfort.

Yes, real food. Also I think it's good to eat seasonally. So at this time of year there are lovely peaches in the shops so I eat peaches every day. In the winter I will eat one or two apples a day. At the moment there are lovely courgettes and green beans but in the winter green beans will be flown from Kenya or somewhere. I see the rainbow eating as over a longer period of time than a day, which I think is easier to achieve and perhaps more 'natural'.

Avoid processed food and things with artificial sweeteners. E.g. If you like flavoured yogurt, try plain yogurt with raisins and honey or something like that and eventually you might start liking plain yogurt (which really is much nicer than flavoured). If you are eating less meat, try buying organic. Eat good quality chocolate in small helpings, not sweets. Try to find decent bread or even make your own.

Drink plenty of water.

Read food labels for ingredients and portion sizes.

And don't beat youself up! Try to discover what foods you really like, treat yourself a bit and try some new things. The book 'French Women Don't Get Fat' is helpful IME.

This is all so helpful - thank you very much!

I want to be able to hear what my body needs nutritionally and to eat for nourishment not for emotional reasons. I think because of all the various diets I have tried I no longer recognise what it is that my body needs.

I definitely eat more portion wise than I should - so that would be a good one to concentrate on, to allow my body to adjust to what being hungry and being satisfied (as opposed to stuffed) actually feels like.

Sugar is probably another one - I eat a lot of sweet things and refined carbs and suffer from swings in blood sugar so stabilising that should also probably be a priority.

I stopped drinking 63 days ago and that has really helped motivate me to focus on long term health as opposed to quick fixes.

Work out your TDEE and aim to eat at least 300 calories under it every day. Use MyFitnessPal to log everything you eat and you will quickly get the hang of it.

It is about eating fewer calories than you use, whichever diet you follow.

And congratulations on stopping drinking - that's a really big achievement and shows you can do this too :)

The only advice you need to keep in mind is:

Eat food that has not been fucked with in a factory.

Eat a good balance of everything.

Don't overeat - portion sizes.

I've yo-yo dieted for years , but at the moment I am losing weight better than ever. I've got diabetes and gallstones so I'm trying to follow low carb low fat, and the weigh is falling off. I don't have an appetite so I'm also eating small portions and not snacking.. not sure how healthy this is overall but it's great for losing weight

As others have said it boils down to eating less calories than you burn. The penny on this has only dropped in the last 3 months for me. I was eating far more calories than I realised because I was making unhealthy choices. If I aim for 1600 calories a day I feel much fuller if I eat a load of veg than half a mars bar for the same amount of calories. Things like pasta, rice, chips, cake and chocolate are high in caloroes so if you're trying to limit calories they're just not worth it. I started logging every single thing I ate and discovered that I was consuming a lot of calories I really didn't need. I can have a bowl of courgette and mushroom for the same calories as a packet of crisps or half a mars bar. It's up to me but basically the high carb high sugar options mean I can have less to eat.

It's quite simple I think. Unprocessed food, in sensible amounts.

Lots of veg on the plate.

Avoid crisps and cake day to day.

Regular exercise.

Lots of water.

A little of what you like won't hurt you.

Remember that you are incredibly lucky to have far more food than you need. Just eat a good variety in smaller amounts. Perhaps spend a portion of your normal food budget on food bank items? Make it a mission to spend as much as you can on the food bank while still having just enough for yourself? If you don't have junk you can't eat it.

I know it wouldn't work for everyone and not everyone would want to do it but, honestly, I eat a vegan diet and have done for 7 months. I've lost over half a stone, have tons more energy and feel really good! The only problem I have is people being wierd about it 😁

I'll tell you what's really helped me keep my weight in check. It sounds daft, but with every single mouthful, I think 'am I enjoying this?' If the answer is yes, I will have more. If the answer is no, or I'm not sure, then I stop eating.

What this has done is stop mindless eating. I feel free to choose what I want to eat and my portion sizes have naturally reduced as I'm finding I am more in tune with when to stop.

My favourite piece of dietary advice come from Michael Pollen - "Eat food, not too much, mostly plants".

Actually he had a few other useful rules too. Look here:
www.webmd.com/food-recipes/news/20090323/7-rules-for-eating

Does any one have any tips for how to deal with comfort eating? If I am feeling down or stressed, I reach for some food to comfort me - and it does help me feel better. Any ideas about how to deal with this?

This is a good helpful thread I think things like slimming world never work for someone like me (I know many others have had success) because there's still that "unlimited, pile it on, free food!" way of thinking which doesn't teach me anything about portions and what my body actually needs. Plus the fear of real natural fats and the abundance of a lot of artificial things that make me feel unwell so I'm losing weight but feeling pants. I get overwhelmed by all the diet advice too and this thread is very informative.

To avoid confusion:

1. Ignore advice from people trying to sell you books or specialised diet food.
2. Don't get your advice from an internet forum of randoms. Look on the NHS website for dietary advice from actual health professionals.

(for example www.nhs.uk/Livewell/Goodfood/Pages/eight-tips-healthy-eating.aspx)

3. If you need to lose a significant amount of weight, speak to your GP and get referred to a dietitian if necessary. Don't get sucked in to diet fads which change weekly and can be dangerous.

Most importantly, never, ever, EVER read the Daily Mail. (good policy anyway, not just about dieting...)

Tripletrouble I stopped comfort eating when I started calorie logging and I realised that if I ate that Mars bar I wouldn't actually feel any happier but I would have used up nearly 300 calories slap would actually feel worse. I realised that whether I ate the treat or not I would essentially feel the same in 10 mins time so may as well distract myself and not eat it.

My book recommendation is 'the angry chef' - order it from the library.

It explains why paltrow, Helmsley, harcombe and so on are talking bollocks, how to spot a crap sleb diet and what normal food is. Also blows apart toxins, superfoods and all the other horseshit.

And what hedgehog said.

Psychologically, speaking as a therapist, you have more chance of success if you move towards something not away from something. So, focusing on losing weight makes it hard to achieve. Moving towards healthful eating, or being healthier, fitter, better longevity, whatever it is, makes you more likely to stay on the right path.

Don't equate happiness with achieving an arbitrary goal (like a weight target). The pursuit of happiness is futile, it is something that occurs usually when you're in the middle of something else.

The long term EPIC study looked at factors contributing to the development of all types of cancer. It found the main points are: don't smoke, exercise regularly, don't inherit crap genes and eat a minimum of 5 a day (and grapes in wine don't count). I try to bear this in mind when tempted to reach for the chocolate - OK, eat it if you want, but make sure you hit your fruit and veg target and get some exercise. Over time you progress more towards eating fruit and veg and place less importance on the 'unhealthy' stuff. Once you're not thinking about it all the time, you're less likely to gravitate towards it.

Long term health studies just haven't shown us anything as valid as the EPIC study about the relationship between food and health. There's a lot of junk science out there. Food is important. It's one part of the equation. Just one. But it's one you can bring under your control and it's worth the investment in the long term.

specialsubject I love Angry Chef too!

pootle love the 'towards' rather than 'away' approach, really positive way of looking at things. May need to use that myself.