Is he selfish or am I just peri menopausal?

[sewingandcoffee]

I have been with OH for 10 years. I left work when we had our children and became a SAHM as he works away during the week.

We quickly fell into a routine where I did everything in house and with kids and he would help when he was home. I used to get a lie in every Sunday. Then when kids started sleeping all night I found I was just getting up with them every morning. Now we have evolved into a situation were on his days off he stays in bed while I get up and make breakfast. I'm a dick because I have been taking him breakfast in bed. Now he just expects it. (Although don't get me wrong he isn't so bad that he demands it)

It's annoying me so much I'm seeing all his behaviour as selfish. Like when he sits on his arse watching football while I make dinner and run after the kids.

I just need perspective. I am mid 40's and do feel I can be unreasonably moody at times and don't know if I'm being so in this respect. It's a situation of my making and now I'm losses off.

How do I change things without looking like a psycho?

Thanks in advance x

Don't just blame perimenopause. He sounds selfish and lazy. You sound unappreciated and understandably fed up. Start by telling him next Sunday you'd like breakfast in bed?

Also, there's a lot of it about. See www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/2993487-he-don-t-do-anything

I think you are probably entitled to one sleep in at the weekend. My shoulders gets sat morning, and I get Sunday. Seems fair to me.
Knock the brekkie in bed off too. That should be a treat, not an expectation surely!?

My dh, not bloody shoulders! My shoulders do not get a separate sleep in

Don't minimise how you feel by blaming it on hormones/menopause /women's things. Your feelings are perfectly valid and don't need to be justified. It sounds like there is some balancing out to be done.