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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

fence

19 replies

robin4 · 30/07/2017 19:49

The fence we erected over 19 years ago when we moved in blew down and we replaced it and the new one is now 3 years old.. It was coslty, £980, and our neighbour did not offer to help (nor did we expect them to). However the other day the neighbor was hammering on trellis on her side and I wonder, AIBU to ask her not to nail any trellis on the fence? What makes it worse is the neighbor asked us to take any supports off their wall which is over the boundary on our side (these supports were put on,with permission, by the previous owner). Which we did, making new supports which were no longer attached to their wall.And are quick to knock and ask for the climder to be cut back if it gets nywhere near their overhanging gutting (one story- high) They also through have often complained if any bushes grow above fence high and once cut it down chucking all the cuttings over(as they do for any pant growth that goes over the boundary.) What d you think? Life too short, or should i complain?

OP posts:
Bumdishcloths · 30/07/2017 19:50

Is it on their boundary or yours?

AlternativeTentacle · 30/07/2017 19:53

They are supposed to throw trimmings back if they are over the boundary, that's the law.

Original poster
robin4 · 30/07/2017 19:53

Ours, infact it is built our side of the boundary, about 8 inches in

OP posts:
SpottedGingham · 30/07/2017 19:55

They're meant to offer the trimmings to the owner, not just chuck them into the garden.

Original poster
robin4 · 30/07/2017 19:56

Do most people do this though? On the other side we trim their hedge that grows over and bag it up,

OP posts:
Bumdishcloths · 30/07/2017 19:56

Sorry just re-read, it's shared boundary. If you put it up and paid for it, it would be reasonable to expect them to ask before making permanent changes to it. I suspect they have assumed that as it is 3 years old and not brand new anymore, that it is not an issue - incorrect of course but that's probably the thinking. With the plant cuttings, technically they're doing the correct thing by 'returning them' to you having trimmed the overhang.

I would suggest it's worth speaking to them and trying to have a mutually beneficial discussion although I appreciate this isn't always easy!

John4703 · 30/07/2017 19:56

I amsitting on this fence (blatently placemarking) because it looks interesting and our neighbour treates our fence like it is his own.

Bumdishcloths · 30/07/2017 19:57

Re-read your update OP, if it's your boundary fence they have no rights to add anything to the other side of it.

DancingLedge · 30/07/2017 19:58

Is this trellis which makes the fence taller? Or trellis attached to their face of the fence? Either way, a neighbour should consult you first, or else put their own fence posts up to attach their trellis to.

Original poster
robin4 · 30/07/2017 20:00

it is not higher than the actual fence

.

OP posts:
SerfTerf · 30/07/2017 20:00

Life's too short.

Bluntness100 · 30/07/2017 20:00

Do you really not want the trellis or something? I think they can be quite nice. If you really don't like it then say no.

Original poster
robin4 · 30/07/2017 20:02

Just don't want to pay out for anther fence any time soon

OP posts:
SerfTerf · 30/07/2017 20:04

Actually, am I understanding correctly? You can't see their trellis can you? It's attached to their side of your fence?

It's the cheek of not allowing you to attach the fence support to their wall but then attaching their trellis to your fence? That's what's annoying you? The principle?

Or are you worried about actual damage to your fence?

I would imagine that their angle on it is that the wall is more attractive as a boundary and that having half a fence showing beyond it is unsightly and needs softening. Are they keen gardeners?

SerfTerf · 30/07/2017 20:04

Tacking a trellis to a good quality fence won't harm it.

Original poster
robin4 · 30/07/2017 20:08

Do people get annoyed about bushes/hedges growing over the boundary and having to cut them?

OP posts:
Original poster
robin4 · 30/07/2017 20:14

Kind of keen gardeners, yes. But don't like anything growing over the boundary

OP posts:
badgercat · 30/07/2017 20:27

Sounds like they want lots of courtesy shown to them but offer none in return !

Biggest mistake we ever made was trying to please our neighbours, they just came back with more and more demands till we put our foot down then suddenly we were the arseholes Hmm

Original poster
robin4 · 30/07/2017 20:35

yep, when we first moved in the husband would climb over the 4 foot original fence to pick our apples and also would short cut across front garden, right past front window to get to their car.....so yes, want lots of things their way but not much 'give' back

OP posts:
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