AIBU to ring the police?

[anonquestionplease]

Regular MN'er NC for this question...

We've got a neighbour who screams at her child/children. This week we've heard it at least three nights, and it seems particularly targeted at one child. The boy sounds about 6 or 7 and the screaming goes on for hours well after midnight. He wakes us up around 1 a.m. (and lives in a separate building, so it is quite loud), crying and yelling. Mum then berates him "Shut the fuck up, give me my fucking phone" and on and on, often lasting for another hour or so. DH and I are concerned for the boy's well being. We haven't heard him scream "help" or "stop" (which would be automatic 999 for me) but he is inconsolable and mum just screams and screams at him.

DH and I haven't any DC of our own but are aware from other neighbours, family, etc that little ones often yell from dreams and the occasional tantrum in the night but this seems like blatant mistreatment or abuse. Especially given the age of the boy, the time of night and response of mum.

We believe we know which family it might be but aren't certain. Have tried to be somewhat friendly with them but they are fairly closed off. Not sure what to do and feel concerned for poor little boy.

Report it to social services.

Call the NSPCC helpline (0808 800 5000) if the child isn't in immediate danger.

Thank you all, didn't know to ring this service.

Where's dad in all this? How many other children?

NSPCC can refer on to SS. I'd certainly do this. And do it again if it keeps happening. This family may already be known to them.

Poor little boy.

What do you mean separate building? Surely if you can hear it you know what house it's coming from? Sounds like nightmares if he's waking screaming at that time of night rather than him refusing to go to bed or something but she sounds horrible!

Aâ

That's so sad, poor boy
I'm a police officer and we are probably not the best ones to contact.
We can put child protection referrals in but they normally come after there's been an offence ie when we go to a domestic, it wouldn't be something we do without that normally unless it's a welfare check, but in any case our referrals just go to social services anyway, so you can effectively cut out the middle man and just go straight to them if you're worried.
Call NSPCC first though and explain everything, see what they recommend.

Have you seen the boy? How does he appear physically? Do you hear him say anything back? Or is he just crying?

Poor boy, good for you for doing something.

Thank you-not sure how many other children, maybe another girl or two but only hear the boy yelling. There are many people going in and out so don't know who lives there and how related, possibly some aunts/uncles and other cousins too?

Don't believe it's nightmares as mum is yelling at boy to give back her phone, etc. and not consoling. We do hear them at other times of day as well but the 1 a.m. fighting is new this week.

Report.

I've had to call NSPCC before, they sent someone the next day from SS. You can call anonymously or leave your details, I left mine so SS contacted me.

Matilda, thank you, will ring NSPCC today. As above, not certain how boy appears physically as they're often fenced off in rear garden behind tall brick wall, and see other children/adults in and out of house. Have only seen in garden a few times when gate is ajar and seems in poor repair but don't want to make judgement based on that alone. Have sometimes smelled marijuana smoke there as well but concerned about consequences of reporting family, will children be taken away?

Boy is crying and yelling, replying back and forth to mum, can't recall at this minute what he says, but does sound coherent and not what LOs say when waking from nightmares. Mostly sounds sad and desperate.
If I do see him looking poorly will escalate concerns.

I'd reccomend recording it on your phone as well so you can be clear about what's happening.

I'd be tempted to knock on the door and ask politely if everything's okay next time I hear it, if only to disrupt her and perhaps make her see how loud it is but then I make bad decisions sometimes

I've had this before with a neighbor- it's heartbreaking. I reported it to social services. I don't know if they did anything but it was registered.

Personally I wouldn't get involved unless you thought the boy was being harmed physically. And as you say in that case you're likely to call the police.

I'm a child protection lead at a school and I'd advise reporting to social services or NSPCC. It could be a bit of a jigsaw that they can put with other concerns around this kid. This sounds unhealthy.

If you knock and then the NSPCC are turning up they'll know or at least think it was you which may not be what you want.

Thank you again, will ring the NSPCC now. Agree that turning up might cause more trouble and better to leave to professionals as no relationship with this family.

Definitely report it. How awful.

will the children be taken away?

Only if SS find evidence that they are at immediate risk of significant harm.

Thank you all, spoke with NSPCC today and was told that since we can't identify exact location of child, we should ring police in next instance and they'll do a health and welfare check in the area. Poor little boy

OP Well done.
So many people don't bother.
I always think of BabyP.
Bad things happen because good people do/say nothing.

Agree with Holly. Call 101 in that case and police will do a welfare check (I remembered after my last post that I have actually done one or two in similar situation to yours, concerned neighbour etc)
Problem is if you don't know the exact number they also won't be able to get an appointment in.
Next time it happens, scuttle out in the dead of night and see if you can track down the exact number. 101 will want to take your details too in case the officers want to speak to the caller but obviously it'll all be kept anonymous.
Well done again OP

Call 999 whilst it's happening, call social services after but unless you know the child's name, address and school it'll be difficult to make a referral.

I'm
Confused to how you don't know the location of the house when you've said about the gate looking on poor repair and so on?