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To end my friendship with my flat mate

8 replies

NinaBiina · 29/07/2017 00:33

Long story so apologies in advance.
Summary-I moved to London a few years ago at the same time as a colleague. Both of us were looking for a new flag around the same time-i had found somewhere with two old school friends but pulled out after she asked me to live with her instead as she was struggling to find somewhere (we'd become friendly, went on holiday etc together so it seemed like a sound idea). So we found a flat. Fast forward six months, she is discussing very loudly at work how horrible I am to live with, how horrible my boyfriend is, how annoying we are and how much she regrets moving in with me.
I am not a bad flat mate-I know I'm not, I clean the flat twice a week, I'm quiet and every week I bake her bloody scones. My boyfriend and I spend minimal time in the flat when she's there so to avoid making her feel awkward. We do shift work so don't always work together which is when she's saying these things. Part of me thinks this is jealously (I recently got a new job in an area she's interested in and will be leaving soon and she's single) but that seemed too trivial for a reason to behave like this. Sorry for the essay but wanted to avoid drip feeding. I'm stuck in this contract in my flat for another year. I don't know what to say or do.

OP posts:

MommaGee · 29/07/2017 00:36

Talk to her.

Hi Fatty, I couldn't help but overhear you talking about how unhappy you are at the flat atm. I was hoping we could talk it through?


MommaGee · 29/07/2017 00:36

Flatty not Fatty


K1092902 · 29/07/2017 00:37

This is why you shouldn't share with friends. It doesn't work out. Period. I shared with my best friend of 8 years in London and it completely destroyed our friendship. We made up about 18 months ago as I bumped into her in Manchester while she was going to a job interview but living together was hell

You just going to have to grit your teeth and get on with it


AlpacaLypse · 29/07/2017 00:38

You're stuck in the flat contract for another year but is she? So she might (fingers crossed) move on and let you find a new more congenial flatmate?

Also you mention a new job - is this within the same organisation or somewhere truly new? In which case her bad mouthing shite won't be getting about!!


Gingerandgivingzerofucks · 29/07/2017 00:39

Was she expecting your bf to also move in, because quite frankly, that would piss me right off. It's not the original deal. Is he paying to stay there? Do you spend any time with her at all now you're loved up? Why don't you two get your own flat? I'd be pissed off too.


HipsterHunter · 29/07/2017 00:44

Well if she is that unhappy with you she probably would be happy with looking for another house mate to take over your tenancy?

Also are you really stuck for another year??? No break clauses?


Fabellini · 29/07/2017 00:46

Er, calm down Ginger, op didn't say her boyfriend had moved in. She said they spend minimal time at the flat when flatmate is there - which I took to mean that they save their Netflix and chill time for when she's on a different shift!


NinaBiina · 29/07/2017 00:51

We both have to remain in the contract for a year. My new job is within the same organisation, so although I'll see much less of her. Word still travels and it's the type of organisation where people rotate and everyone knows everyone so I'd rather my personal life wasn't being discussed.
So my bf hasn't moved in. He stays over nights she isn't in the flat or she's working.

OP posts:
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