Newborn sleep

[alicelake]

My DD is 4 days old, and as is expected is up most of the night, and sleeps all day. Literally. I'm still getting to grips with feeding/building a supply so I expect this. But two people now have said to me 'you need to stop her sleeping so much in the day' erm, why? Am I doing something wrong? Why would I keep a newborn awake?? That just sounds mad to me!

You are not doing anything wrong. Newborns do this because in the womb they are rocked to sleep during the day by you moving around and wake up when you're still at night.

You can't keep a newborn awake. You shouldn't, but ime you couldn't if you wanted to! Ignore them-she'll switch it round in her own time.

Oh and congratulations on your new baby

Congratulations on your new baby! Ignore everyone. Newborns don't have circadian rhythms so don't have a concept of day or night and will just sleep and wake regularly regardless of the time. Google 4th trimester and smile and nod at well-meaning but ultimately idiotic friends/family.

You absolutely don't need to stop them! It's the opposite really, sleep breeds sleep and sleeping is growing and is restorative for you too so enjoy it! Soon you'll notice slightly different patterns emerging but for now get your rest when you can and enjoy the peace!!! Congratulations

Congratulations! And what is wrong with people? Of course you are doing nothing wrong.

I took this opportunity to watch all the guff I'd been meaning to but felt too old to publicly enjoy

Gossip Girl
Dawson's Creek
The OC

You are 100% in the right.

Yes, nothing you can do I think!

They do get the hang of day and night in the end, like by 2 years old

You're doing it right, keep up the good work. I say that as someone who is due again very soon and beginning to remember how difficult the early days are.

You will get so much shit advice from everyone and their dog ... as another poster has said just smile, nod ... but in your head 'oh do fuck off dear'

Yanbu.

Prolactin, your hormone that produces your milk, is at its highest level at night (2am-6am to be precise). So obviously feeding at this time is really important to help build and maintain milk supply. Your newborn "knows" this and this is why she knows this.

Among other reasons obviously.

Keep it up op, you are doing a fab job

From memory, it does just happen by itself even if you're going crazy trying to 'fix' the baby. After a week or two we only had low/ no lights at night, minimal nappy changes but they are programmed to end up the right way around.

I struggled to bf so can't comment on that. But from my experience with dd (now 18 months) is that newborns pretty much do what they want, when they want! You can't keep a new born awake. You could however make dd sleep! She would drop off as soon as she was on my chest for the first couple of months. I think I stayed in that position for about 6 weeks! Smile and nod, do what works for you. Make sure you try and sleep or at least rest when you can.

She should in no way whatsoever be stopped from sleeping. My daughter was up all night building my supply at that age it is totally normal. Breastfeeding can be such a rough ride in the beginning and can be absolutely exhausting but it gets much much better soon, I promise! Keep the lights dim at night when she wakes, I would highly recommend swaddling, it helps so much towards making them feel secure in their crib and will sleep longer. Congratulations you are doing amazingly well.

Of course you aren't doing anything wrong! When mine were newborn I did try to distinguish night from day straight away (i.e. feed in darker rooms with no chatting/tv - i read books on my phone). I fed them whenever they needed, night or day. During the day I make no effort to limit the noise when they slept. Congratulations!

I used to refer to this page regarding sleep: www.mybabysleepguide.com/2013/02/average-sleep-charts-by-age.html

As you can see a newborn should average 16-18 hours sleep per day with an awake time between sleep of no more than an hour. Obviously it's different for every baby, but newborns sleep a lot, keeping her awake when she wants to sleep will only make her miserable.

Just realised you said DD is 4 days old-you might not be like me but when my DD was a few days old I second guessed everything I did and was constantly thinking I was wrong. I cried a lot too-midwives in hospital said it was hormones (in fact when they came to do my obs and I was sat crying one of them just said "Day 3?" and hugged me when I nodded )

Thanks all!! Haha day 3, I feel that. Hormones everywhere. I don't see why people feel the need to impart their advice sometimes. I know what I'm doing. And I certainly won't be spending my day keeping my baby awake hoping she sleeps at night, ridiculous.

It's only like this for a few weeks. Like others have said you can gently encourage learning to recognise day and night by having things bright and noisy during the day and quiet and dim lighting at night.

I remember sitting up feeding literally all night on about day 4 or 5 too. Get as much sleep as you can during the day (I didn't manage much - too many visitors and even when I could sleep I didn't as my head was in too much of a mess!)

DD is 10 weeks now, and I still let her sleep as much as she needs in the day, even if that means holding and rocking her. You literally can't keep a newborn awake, I find that if she needs to sleep then she will fall asleep while feeding, or while winding, or on her playmat, or even while she's 'sitting' on my knee.

I went down the route of keeping things light and nosy in the day, dark and quiet at night. Offer the breast frequently in the day and change her nappy often too. She's swaddled at night and I only change her if she's pooed. And already she's settling into 2-3 night feeds and does a 5 hour stretch most nights.