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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To have had enough of this

35 replies

Youvegotafriendinme · 27/07/2017 01:28

I've posted in sleep but Posting here for traffic.

I've had enough of night times with My 8mo DS. I can not take any more.
The screaming and crying is relentless and nothing stops him. This has been going on for over 2 weeks now. He wakes any where between 12 and 3 and once awake just screams for hours on end. We have literally tried every thing.
Offered milk, bottle, teething gel, calpol as a last resort as teething, picking up, brought to our bed, CC, etc etc
He has 3 meals a day and eats well, he has roughly 22oz a day
3 hours of naps
Isn't over tired or over stimulated before bed.

Me and DH are at each other's throats because of it.

Please can someone help us.

OP posts:
AfunaMbatata · 27/07/2017 11:39

Could he be having reflux?

KatyN · 27/07/2017 12:15

Have you tried having one night a weekend each? It means on that night you might get hardly any sleep and you'll be in your own but you will get a full night the next night?

We still do this (and my oldest is nearly 6). I go to bed at 9 and sleep till 9 the next morning. I feel I can do anything for the rest of the week because I have that full night to regroup.

NotSoNewbie · 27/07/2017 12:27

Did you introduce a new food recently?

TheSparrowhawk · 27/07/2017 12:37

Firstly don't worry that you're doing something wrong - lots of babies do this. It is horrible at the time but it usually doesn't last.

To deal with it, your DH and you need to be on the same side. It is absolutely not acceptable for him ever to call you a cunt and a prick. He needs to sincerely apologise for that and not do it again.

It can be very hard to figure out what causes this sort of behaviour - if he's happy during the day then chances are nothing in particular is very wrong and he's just freaking out for some reason. In that case it's just a matter of survival until it passes. You and your DH need to work out a sensible way of managing the situation so that you both get at least some sleep every night. Eventually it will stop, but if in the meantime you start to hate each other the effect will be long lasting.

I know it's really hard - my DD (second child) was a hideous sleeper and I felt desperate and hopeless. She's now 4 and still makes a fuss at bedtime but sleeps perfectly well and it's all behind us. That will happen for you too.

rosieroses · 27/07/2017 12:43

Perhaps try a later bed time for a few weeks and see if this helps him sleep through the night. We have recently done this with our DD 10 months to help her consolidate her 2 naps into one. He probably is tired during the day with having disturbed nights, so maybe it will help to get the nights sorted and then daytime naps. We found going from 3 to 2 daytime naps really easy but around your DSs age the change from 2 to 1 daytime nap really affected bed time etc. I found doing something stimulating during the day helped hold off the tiredness when adjusting nap time, as I would expect at 8 months that he should manage more than 2 hours awake between naps, maybe he just isn't tired enough at night. Hope things improve and you get some sleep soon.

EatTheChocolateTeapot · 27/07/2017 13:04

Try to sleep during the day when he naps to catch up. With my DS, I used to take him in the living room to play for an hour and then put him back to sleep in our bed (DD is much easier so she will usually fall back asleep after a while).
You have to find something that works for you, a way to manage until he grows out of it. It is really tough but he can't help it.

WhatWouldGenghisDo · 27/07/2017 13:27

I'm wondering about the late nap as well. My DS used to wake any time after 11pm and scream inconsolably for 4-6 hours ... but only if I'd allowed him to nap (even catnap) after 3pm. Even 2 minutes doze in the buggy and we were doomed. Perhaps try bringing the late nap forward?

onlyjustme · 27/07/2017 13:56

Apologies if anyone has suggested this but I have not read all of the replies...

WHERE is he sleeping in the day?

With both of mine, the cot was only ever used at night time. Naps were downstairs in the daytime. In travel cot, often left in pushchair to sleep if fell asleep on a walk, and when he got a bit older DS used to climb into the pushchair to go to sleep!!!

So there was always a very clear distinction between a nap and a proper sleep. I think it made a difference...
Is this something you could do? Babies don't tend to need it totally quiet to sleep. Naps downstairs worked well for us.

Mixedupmummy · 27/07/2017 17:25

Agree with others who've said 2 naps but finished by 3 at the latest I'd say and in bed for 7.

Also might be the 8/9/10 month sleep regression. If so it should pass. Flowers in the meantime

Figgygal · 27/07/2017 17:30

Also suggest his naps are maybe too long. My 9 month old has 2 naps a day probably lucky to have an hour and half sleep any day though sometimes we get a 2 hour nap if he's been up early that day. He never sleeps after 3.30 so he's ready for bed at 7.30.

Does your dh help you in the nighttime? You need to agree an approach you both agree with and him calling you names like that is completely out of order

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