AIBU?
To hate going anywhere when DPs friends are there
K1092902 · 22/07/2017 17:38
I hate it.
It's literally like I'm invisible.
Today we went to see his old school friend who he hasn't seen in a good 5 years. They bumped into each other a few weeks back and exchanged numbers and we were invited to a BBQ last weekend
DH didn't speak to me once, didn't bother introducing me to his friends and while they were lovely and made a small effort to talk to me like I did most of the time I was ignored and it was like I wasn't there
He has done this is the past to when I've literally sat there for hours and not said a word and felt really embarrassed and awkward
DH is going back there next Friday for a drink and I don't want to go.
AIBU?
LouHotel · 22/07/2017 17:51
Do you ask him why he behaved like this?
I had an ex who use to this and he also hated it when i would take it upon myself to engage his mates in conversation. I think he didnlt like the idea that they liked me...you can imagine why that relationship didnt work out.
RapunzelsRealMom · 22/07/2017 17:54
He absolutely is a twat for behaving like this, but if I'm not introduced to someone, I'll say, "Hi I'm Rapunzel. What's your name?" and interact with them myself.
I'd be annoyed with DH and speak to him about it later but I wouldn't let it ruin my night.
Hopefully if you discuss it with him, you won't have to do this, but you're an adult so you can introduce yourself, despite his ignorance
Fruitcorner123 · 22/07/2017 18:07
Have you spoken to him about his as you say he has done it before? You definitely need to raise it with him.
I wouldn't be going on Friday though, time is too precious to waste doing something you won't enjoy and wont have any benefit for anyone else. It doesn't sound like he will be bothered if you don't go so no big deal.
SoftlyCatchyMonkey1 · 22/07/2017 18:17
Ynbu
That's appalling behaviour from your DP, he's supposed to support you
If it was me I would definitely go and make a point of being chatty with all his friends. Ask lots of questions, find out things about them. Try and have a good time. I know it's awkward when you don't know anyone and they all know each other. Perhaps they feel a bit awkward that he hadn't introduced you. People can be weird like that.
IStoleDipsysHat · 22/07/2017 18:25
I had an ex like this. One party it was so pronounced that his mates decided it wasn't on and sat with me while he went to get a drink. That way if he wanted to continue the conversation he had to come over to them, he wasn't happy about it and they called him on acting like a dick.They were the only people we both new and he would pick somewhere to sit, then say he would be back in a sec and bugger off, so we had the choice to sit with them from the beginning he just preferred to stick me in a corner and then when he was safe he knew where I was, buggered off.
Gingerandgivingzerofucks · 22/07/2017 18:31
Have you made any kind of effort to talk to them, tho? I was first DP of my dh's group, I think and he was delighted that I was life and soul of the party (whilst not taking over!) and wanted me to go with him every time.
If you're the shy retiring type, I can imagine being with his mates is torture, so just don't go. However, you risk isolating yourself. Can you try to get to know them a bit? Have you spoken to your DP about him being a rude twat yet?
spiderlight · 22/07/2017 18:55
This reply has been deleted
Message withdrawn at poster's request.
K1092902 · 22/07/2017 19:53
I get he wanted to catch up with his friend. Fair enough. But it's not too much to ask for him to say "This is my wife K" is it??
It's starting to really piss me off. It doesn't happen very often as we tend to do either our own thing or see my mutual friends.
I spoke to him about it but he doesn't see why he should introduce me to someone when I can do it myself 
. Surely it's just manners?
And then not to say barely a word to me all night is just rude
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.