Was this a sexual assault?

[HBaker]

If you meet a man online, you make out in his car, he asks you to have sex, you say no, then he pulls your hand to his groin and basically rub himself with it?

You were frozen. So you basically just let him do it.

However, you start "dating" him. Which basically means meeting up, making out in his car. You never consent to sex, but did some stuff.

Your friend (another guy you tell this to) tells you you're a "cock-tease" because you don't want to go all the way.

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This happened many many years ago.

It's unpleasant.
You should be pressured by anyone into sex of any kind if you don't want it.

This happened so many years ago but I just realized now that my obsession with this guy, my wanting to end up with him (I don't anymor), probably stemmed from this incident.

It doesn't matter what you are consenting to, you can still turn down sex. Your male friend's attitude is now well out of date and borders on being a rape apologist.

I don't think it was a sexual assault, you were put in a situation were something happened that you didn't prior consent to, but I don't want sex to ever get that clinical, tbh.

He should have asked, first, ideally. Have you worked out why you wanted to be with him and got to a point were that won't happen again?

I never figured it out. Maybe I wanted desperately to make it right, I mean, if we ended up together then whatever happened would be somehow ok since we ended up together.

I was very inexperienced when this happened.

Yes that's sexual assualt. A mild one in terms of prosecuting & so on if that makes sense but definately forced sexual contact that you didn't consent too and were clearly traumatised by.

And yes maybe you fixated on being with this guy as a way of denying how awful this was.

Yeah I don't intend to have him prosecuted. Just trying to make sense of what happened and why i became adamant to have him afterwards for a long time. Even when I left and moved far away I still stalked him.

I still remember that night.

It really depends on whether he believed you consented to the sexual activity or not. Which is impossible to tell from your description.

Of course it's sexual assault.
I'm sorry.

It really depends on whether he believed you consented to the sexual activity or not. Which is impossible to tell from your description

Um, no, it is easy to tell. She clearly said she didn't want sex, he did something sexual.

I really don't think men are too stupid to know what words mean.