Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

When is it ok to go with potty training toddler

31 replies

girlonmn · 19/07/2017 07:01

We've been confined to 2 days in the house, we have a 2 mile walk to town. I'm dreading him just peeing himself constantly but read before on here you must not let them pee in the street
What do I do, genuinely getting stressed

OP posts:
Miloarmadillo1 · 19/07/2017 07:06

Take a potty (and spare clothes) out with you. Big difference between letting your 10 yr pee in the street and a potty training toddler getting caught short.

coffeekittens · 19/07/2017 07:07

Have you got a pushchair you can put a potty under? I'd just keep walking but remind them to tell you if they need a wee, whip the potty out and try and let them go discreetly if you can, and pack lots of spare clothes, baby wipes and rewards.

If your toddler is constantly wetting themselves then I don't actually think they're ready to potty train, I know accidents happen but if it is constant then their bladder isn't mature enough to be potty training.

WellErrr · 19/07/2017 07:12

If they're not reliable enough for a short walk after a couple of days they're not ready in my opinion.

How old? How long does the walk take?

Dashper · 19/07/2017 07:14

A toddler peeing in the street is fine. DS is toilet trained but we don't expect him to hold his wee as long as an adult.
YY to lots of spare clothes, and nappy bags to put the wet clothes in.

monkeyfacegrace · 19/07/2017 07:16

No problem with a small toddler having a wee in the road.

But if he can't manage 2 miles without an accident then he isn't ready for potty training. They can either feel their bladder or they can't. I'm a firm believer in allowing them to do it in their own time, and they tend to get it almost instantly when they are actually ready.

katienana · 19/07/2017 07:18

Take potty with you in a carrier bag, if he needs to use it then just pop him on. You can just get rid of contents down drain.

Original poster
girlonmn · 19/07/2017 07:21

He is 3yr walk will take a good hour, he is very very very slow 😐
He needs to be trained for going to nursery so I have no option but to persevere

OP posts:
Penhacked · 19/07/2017 07:25

Don't be daft, I wouldn't look twice if I saw a three year old weeing into a drain. Bloody hell dogs do it against every lamppost and tree! He is a boy, a potty will make things harder. And anyway the thrill of an outdoor wee will encourage him to go en route. Don't stress it, most people will understand and those who don't can mind their own business.

SendintheArdwolves · 19/07/2017 07:29

He needs to be trained for going to nursery so I have no option but to persevere

If he's not ready, he's not ready -- it's a question of development of the signals that go to his brain, not a question of "training". If you attempt to make a child potty train before they are capable of doing it, all you will do is make them anxious/full of shame/feel like a failure/have weird hangups about control. And they won't potty train any earlier.

Think of it like this: could someone "train" you to be physically able to hold back your period until you got to a toilet? No matter how much they wanted you to be able to do it, or insisted that you "just had to learn", it wouldn't be possible.

ComputerUserNotTrained · 19/07/2017 07:31

I'd rather use a buggy and pull-ups if need be than be trapped indoors for days on end because a mile long walk would take an hour (unless the walk was the point of the outing).

ComputerUserNotTrained · 19/07/2017 07:32

Oh, and I wouldn't think twice if I saw a tiny child having a wee at the side of the road.

coddiwomple · 19/07/2017 07:34

Potette are great!
As above, take spare clothes so you can change him if needed.

Don't stress about it, it's really not a big deal. Just use common sense, don't plonk the child in front of a bus stop full of people! (let alone the middle of a restaurant Hmm ) I have used potties in the street with my little ones, when it's hot they need to drink a lot, and if you are away for several hours, they need the potty. No big deal. I'd much rather some wet pants than a dehydrated child.

When they are very little, I check with them every 10 minutes outside, when we are on a quiet side street or something out of the way. You just need to carry a big bag with everything you need.

Good luck!

munchkinmaster · 19/07/2017 07:38

I've discarded my designer handbag and now carry a potty in a carrier. It's a super urine inspired look.

With 2nd child we have done a wee phase of going out in pull ups and that's been helpful. Child one would just pee in a pull up though so it was pants or nothing.

SomewhatIdiosyncratic · 19/07/2017 07:45

I've got no issue with a small child weeing in a bush. An hour is a long time to young children and it's easy for them to be caught out.

My 4 year old who trained very happily 2 years ago still has moments of getting caught out occasionally. For all the checking that they need a toilet when there is one available, sometimes they make poor judgements. There are very, very few public toilets around and often no publicly accessible buildings like pubs/ cafes/ leisure centres within a practical diversion route so sometimes he does have to add to the bushes what dogs, cats and foxes do anyway. As long as it's not where people will walk through it or somewhere sheltered where it can't wash away.

Catsize · 19/07/2017 07:46

He's not ready. Why can;t nursery handle a child who isn't potty trained? Sounds strange. You'll do more harm than good by forcing this.

coddiwomple · 19/07/2017 07:57

Why do people say he's not ready?
Have your children gone from nappy to potty without any "accident" at all? That's very unusual, sometimes it takes a couple of days. If the child still doesn't use the potty after 3-4 days, sure, give up, wait a few weeks and try again, but I think it's unreasonable to expect them to be dry from day 1. If yours have been, great, but they are not all the same.

Original poster
girlonmn · 19/07/2017 08:14

He's not long woken up and has been dry all night upon checking, surely that's a sign he is ready? How do I know when he isn't?

OP posts:
Groupie123 · 19/07/2017 08:20

At 3 if he isn't ready you need to make him ready. Some people on this thread are ridiculous and probably had 4 yo in nappies! Suggest you take pull ups and tell him to let you when he needs to go. Alternatively take a potty with you for the walk.

coddiwomple · 19/07/2017 08:22

I knew mine were not ready when they refused the potty or mainly wet their pants. When they started using it, prompted every 30 minutes or less to be fair, and had no more than 1 accident or 2, we just kept going.

I was lucky to be able to do it only during school holidays: if they ask, you can put them on a potty within 5 seconds. When at nursery, there are too many children so it sometimes take too long for the staff to bring them to the toilets. I wouldn't expect them to drop everything and everyone to grab mine.

Original poster
girlonmn · 19/07/2017 08:25

That's why I'm potty training during the holidays, his nursery is still open but not putting him in because I don't expect them to rush and get him to a potty. He starts new nursery next month and they have to be out of nappies. He does do wees on the potty, and I expected to take the potty with me I just didn't know if I should risk it or stay in for another day

OP posts:
TizzyDongue · 19/07/2017 08:35

He's not a mouse so won't be peeing constantly Grin.

No in all seriousness, you have to make that first trip out at some point. A walk seems ideal. A wee before you leave, and go for it.

If you using the car or buggy at any point put one of those disposable bed sheets underneath. Bring a change of clothes, wipes and bag for any wet stuff. Hopefully you won't need any of it.

Try it - only risk is him wetting himself and you having find a spot where there's not a crowd to change him.

In all seriousness if he wets himself on the way to town he can stay wet for a short while until you get somewhere to change him. You don't have to change him immediately - ideally yes but the time he's wet while you are getting somewhere to change him he'll be ok.

AshesEmbersFlames · 19/07/2017 08:36

Just so you're aware, legally a nursery cannot refuse to take him because he is still in nappies. They may prefer him to be potty trained, they may say it's their policy but they cannot enforce it.

coddiwomple · 19/07/2017 08:40

Even primary schools can't refuse children in nappies, so it sounds strange that a nursery would.

Again, travel potty/potette for was a life saver. You dispose of the bag the same way you would dispose a nappy.

thethoughtfox · 19/07/2017 08:42

Get a little portable potty. This one folds down flat and fits under a pram or in a large handbag. We had to do an emergency pee pee outside Marks and Spencer's once!

www.jojomamanbebe.co.uk/potette-plus-potties-d4218.html

Babbitywabbit · 19/07/2017 08:45

If you're worried he won't be able to make an hour's walk, Sounds like he's not ready for potty training yet. There's a wide age range over which children are ready.

If he's gone to the toilet before setting out, and is perfectly well, there's no reason he shouldn't last an hour (though not the end of the world if he does need a quick wee in a discreet spot.) potty training is about the child recognising the sign they need the loo though- it doesn't mean they are needing to pee pretty continuously!

Swipe left for the next trending thread