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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Can anyone help I need a phrase to to say as I'm being treated like shit in my house

25 replies

Wishforsnow · 19/07/2017 02:33

Thank you for anyone reading. I have the most Horric house guests. It's my brother and all his family and they speak polish and ignore me. I'm probably going to ask them to leave tomorrow but it would be so wonderful if someone could let me know how to say in polish ' stop talking about me when I'm in the room' I'm not parainoid I have the house guests fro hell!

OP posts:

Italiangreyhound · 19/07/2017 02:36

I am not sure you would be able to convince them to stop talking about you with a phrase, but you could try Google translate.

Better to call an end to the visit if you are feeling treated badly or better still talk to your brother and ask him to persuade the group to change their habits of leave. Good luck.

Original poster

Wishforsnow · 19/07/2017 02:44

Yes, will probably ask them to leave. Never expected a situation like this. I know it is petty but I would just love one little sentence maybe to make them think oh does she know stuff we have said. I've been a dogsbody and walked over like I never thought I would ever do

OP posts:

Aquamarine1029 · 19/07/2017 02:59

"Fuck off" is usually recognized worldwide.

Original poster

Wishforsnow · 19/07/2017 03:07

Aqua yes that is perfect! However, I just got blank looks with that with some. Really need to say something in polish before I end up kicking my brother and his extended family out.
Hoping with all hopes it may just shock them that I may know something

OP posts:

DixieFlatline · 19/07/2017 03:12

There is no way you are going to be able to pronounce anything you find to say well enough that the reaction will be good. It'll just be more like 'Uh... what did she say? It sounded a bit like X Y... Z? Ah I guess she's trying to say X Z Y? Huh.' No impact.

MrsTerryPratchett · 19/07/2017 03:18

How come you and your brother don't share a common language? Or is it everyone else?

Aquamarine1029 · 19/07/2017 03:24

You can use Google translate and you can listen to whatever you type in in any language you choose. translate.google.com/m/translate

DixieFlatline · 19/07/2017 03:31

Google translate cannot be trusted to not make you sound like an idiot. Diligent googling of the phrase it turns up, to check for authenticity, can go a long way though.

NoMoreDecorating · 19/07/2017 03:32

How do you know they're talking about you if you can't undetstand the language?

SabineUndine · 19/07/2017 04:50

You can tell, believe me. It's in body language and gestures.

OhtoblazeswithElvira · 19/07/2017 05:11

How come you and your brother speak a different language?

Anyway it sounds like the problem here is not the language but the manners! Can you not talk to your brother and make your feelings clear?

buttfacedmiscreant · 19/07/2017 05:20

I'd just tell your brother.

"I'm sick of you and your family ignoring me and talking about me in Polish and making me feel unwelcome in my own home. You need to leave.... this morning. Please be gone by lunchtime."

Tofutti · 19/07/2017 06:26

Actions speak louder than words.

Tell them to be gone by 6pm today. If they don't leave, put all their stuff outside.

kalinkafoxtrot45 · 19/07/2017 06:31

You don't need to speak Polish. You just need to get your brother told good and proper and he can tell the rest of them. Why are they in your home and behaving like this?

BoysofMelody · 19/07/2017 06:33

I assume you and your brother are native English speakers and he has children with a Polish woman and now lives in Poland, so his wife and children are native Polish speakers who converse with their children in Polish?

If that's the case, YABU, they are just talking to their children and each other in their usual language.

BoysofMelody · 19/07/2017 06:34

And if you don't understand Polish, how so you know they're talking about you?

DisorderedAllsorts · 19/07/2017 06:52

How do you know they are talking about you? Could it be that you just don't like them & are using the language barrier as an excuse to get rid of them? Is your brother and his children visiting you on holiday or actually living with you?

Mummyoflittledragon · 19/07/2017 06:54

Forget the polish. You'll only make a fool out of yourself for saying it with a poor accent. This will just give them another stick to beat you with and they'll probably laugh at you.

Do what buttfaced said. Give them a time to leave by.

Troels · 19/07/2017 07:51

Wake them up OP, tell them to start packing and leave. Get your home back.

Trollspoopglitter · 19/07/2017 08:03

To be fair, my mother tongue isn't English. My husband and children don't speak it.

When we are visiting my parents, my parents and I make huge efforts to speak only English with each other at all times, so others don't feel uncomfortable.

It is incredibly, incredibly exhausting and we often fail daily. We slip into chatting in our native language when making throwaway comments like "where's the milk, mom" without even realising we've switched languages.

I will be told and will say to them "English, please" at least 50 times a day.

The kids are picking up and learning the language but my husband will never crack (it's not an easy one).

So I can sympathise with them slipping into Polish without even realising it. You just need to sound like a parrott and keep at them ENGLISH PLEASE ENGLISH PLEASE ENGLISH PLEASE

OhtoblazeswithElvira · 19/07/2017 08:19

This is tricky, isn't it? Are the rest of the family able to speak English to the same standard as Polish? If they're not then it would be unreasonable to ask them to switch languages (imagine talking to your child in a language neither of you are fluent in). But the OP is not being treated right it seems... wish she would come back to tell us more...

Rufustherenegadereindeer1 · 19/07/2017 08:49

OP is saying extended family

That doesn't usually mean children

Could it be older siblings and parents

Doesn't matter, sounds like the issue is what they are saying, not how they are saying it

Sister in law and her children sometimes (rarely to be completely fair) talk in sign language, sharing jokes. I find it very excluding (they are not deaf)

SparklyMagpie · 19/07/2017 08:58

Was also wondering why you don't know/speak polish?

ChasedByBees · 19/07/2017 09:06

I imagine the brother has married someone Polish and learnt it? Ask them to leave in any language OP.

sashh · 19/07/2017 09:27

You only need one word, 'What?' Sorry I don't know what it is in Polish but it just confuses people enough that they don't know what you do and don't know.

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