My DM and DF have been together 40 years this year, I'm very close to my DM and we confide in each other about everything and I've been conflicted about what to think about certain situations that she has admitted have occurred in their relationship and continue to this day. Some of these may seem little but I'm trying to build up a picture about what I'm seeing and whether others would like the same as me.
My DF never cleans up after himself, they both work full time but he will leave his things everywhere, everything he uses is down to her to tidy up and if she doesn't do it she gets called lazy.
My DM never does anything she wants to do, if she wants to go out she tells me because my DF won't ever take her out despite going for various fishing trips and spending time with his friends.
He humiliates her in front of others by shouting about something that is so minuscule it causes a lot of atmospheres between everyone in the room and she just takes it and talks to me about it later when he is out of ear shot.
The most worrying one for me is that if she doesn't want to have sex with him he gets moody and starts insulting her and accusing her of silly things e.g cheating on him.
He is never violent, I have little respect for him because of it and I'm struggling to watch my DM go through this.
She gets upset, she loves him to death but she cannot see that (in my opinion) he is emotionally abusing her and it's upsetting me.
I just want to know whether my thoughts on the situation are right and what I should do really? Do I sit and listen to her and be a hand to hold or should I do something to help her?