to pretend the knickers aren't mine?

[Celledora]

Toddler just threw underwear from the clothes horse over the balcony into the courtyard we share with ALL of our neighbours and where a few older kids are playing. They're clean but old (y'know the ones, period pants). If I leave them, the maintenance people will have to pick them up on their weekly check which is a bit grim for them - but I know we will forever be pants-lady-and-baby if I can't get them ninja style... would you just sacrifice the pants and hope none tells the maintenance men whose they are/that they don't post them through my letterbox?

Could you dig a tunnel under the ground floor of your building, ending it just beside where your pants are lying? Then pop up, grab them and return home. You may have to be underhand and go underground to undertake the return of your underwear.

I'd go for all milk tray ad style ( and wait til midnight)

What is this NNSOHD
.(,National No sense of humour day)
I'm sure this is supposed to be lighthearted.

What is this NNSOHD
.(,National No sense of humour day)
I'm sure this is supposed to be lighthearted.

What are you on about?

It's very lighthearted.

A couple of misery guts posts at the beginning but all the other responses are very tongue in cheek!

Leave them. They could be anybody's. In fact, send a note round to all your neighbours to complain and call the council. That's what I did when there was a dead cat outside our house and frankly this sounds a lot worse.

Go big or go home.
Lob a couple of sofas over the balcony carefully aimed to land on and hide the panties.
Go down into courtyard, nonchalantly recline on the now upturned sofas and lean down discreetly to pick up the pants.
No one will even talk about the pants, you will be the weird sofa throwing lady.

Large hoodie on, hood up, matching little hoodie for your accomplice of course. Fake moustache maybe... Then stealth the hell out of it. It's the only way.

*Today 19:14 LoniceraJaponica

Or wait until it is dark

But then you have darked on pants to deal with.

Wait until dark!

Report to the local newspaper/Daily Mail. Cross face, crossed arms "Phantom pant thrower in courtyard caper".

Could get you a post on the "Angry people in Local Newspapers" Facebook page.

It's a lovely evening so get a deck chair, glass of lemonade (homemade of course) for DC, something worthy and non-alcoholic for yourself, go down, plonk deckchairs over knickers and pretend you are enjoying the last of the evening sun.
After half an hour, get up collapse deck chair and scoop up pants.
Job done.

I'd go with 'tut tut, some people' while picking up with tongs and pretending to bin.

Woofwoof, could work except I'd undoubtedly end up known as the local pant-snatcher!

Fontella, at least then I'd identify Python-philes, which would be fun!

Janiston, judgy-biddies to the rescue! No pants too big, no pants too small...

Paxillian, I am seeing a squirrel and hearing the mission impossible theme tune...I shall train and assign a similar mission to Alvin, Simon or Theodore...(uh oh, outed my own species-ism - do squirrels and chipmunks seem the same-ish to others or so I need some major work shopping?!)

Figaro2017, onlybof tgey were washed out Boden pants or something. These kids know their cotton thread count...

At least they aren't worn and hanging out of the hem of your jeans.

It would be very embarrassing if that were to happen trust me, I know.

Bettercallsaul1, Jimmy would be proud of this plan! I also have a mother who used to sing 'I am a mole and I live in a hole' under her breath so think this plan is made for me!

Fontella, I am also enjoying a niiiice cup/vat of tea/vino rouge Cheers!

leave them til the older kids go in then sneak down so no one will see you.

I knew I had the solution, Celledora! It was obvious really!