AIBU to miss having my little boy in our bed?

[flownthecoopkiwi]

We have co slept with both children since birth, with both staying in until around 3.5 years. Our DD has been in her own bed happily since then and when we had our DS he has been in our bed. He has always had a bed and bedroom but we hadn't pushed him to move out, although we were planning to. This weekend we bought him a film character duvet cover and now he will only go to sleep in his own big boy bed. We had to go in and wake him up this morning.

AIBU to be pleased that he has made the transition and that DH and i can have the bed to ourselves, but also be very sad that I can't snuffle him all night anymore?

My DD2 slept through from the night she was born and only ever came in to us in the morning. She did stay in her own cot with us until she was a year, but we never heard a peep from her. She still sleeps the same way.

I agree, I wouldn't dream of co sleeping. Its personal preference. My DD sleeps 8-8 ish, she reduced her night feeds herself and we moved her to her own room when she was getting to around 5am (which is creeping later). This coincides with DH being able to give a feed before he goes to work and she goes back to sleep after. I sleep better now which helps during the day and my mood has improved no end. She is in the next room with the monitor etc We responded to our baby, as I said before everyone is different
Regarding the risk of SIDs, it does seem 6 months is a little arbitrary with no clear 'why'. I'm happy to be corrected with the 'why' not just statistics

Trust me - you haven't finished with co-sleeping just because they have their own bed.
DS1 is 13 and fell asleep in our bed the other night (he claims it is more comfortable so sits in our bed on his phone), DS2 is 9 and will happily take any excuse to get in our bed (it's like sleeping with a ninja octopus - arms and legs flailing!)

Notsosureanymoors

Just about to move my 3 month old to her own cot in her own room.
exactly what I did with all of my kids, we've never kept them in our bedroom for more than 3 months, but it's personal preference.
Different countries have different advice, and I did disregard most of the UK advice, where it's acceptable to put mothers in a communal ward without food or drink and kick them out after a couple of hours or a day if they had c-section. No one is that bothered about the risk of haemorrhage so soon after surgery, so the UK vision of risks is debatable. 3 months is fine in other countries, so it was fine for me. Anyway.

I think it would be really upsetting for both parties to sleep together for that long and then separate, I'd rather do it whilst she isnt aware and wont be upset
You don't have to co-sleep with a baby to have children come to sleep in your bed! When they are in a cot, they will call you when they are unwell or can't sleep, and it's up to you if you sleep on the floor or take them with you.
Once they are out of the cot, 18 months/ 2 years old roughly?, they come without asking you when they are scared, unwell, sick. Unless you never allow them to come in your bedroom, they will have to be sent to their own bed one day or another.

My 1 year old co-sleeps by accident... He has his own cot in his own room, and he is always put down in there for the first few hours, but as soon as he wakes up, I bring him into my bed (he's still bf) because I can't be bothered to sit up for ages with him. I feed him lying down and he falls asleep on my shoulder... it's beautiful. He smells lovely, of baby shampoo and him. I know my DH would prefer not to have him in the bed quite as much, but tough. The day will come when he doesn't. Our 4 year old sleeps through in his own room, and has done for about a year (with the odd exception - nightmare etc), so I know it won't last long.

You're not BU, they're only little for such a short time!

Regarding the risk of SIDs, it does seem 6 months is a little arbitrary with no clear 'why'. I'm happy to be corrected with the 'why' not just statistics

Highest risk of unexplained death in babies is between 0 and 4 months. It then drops a bit, but as babies tend to be able to roll over from about 4 months there is a greater risk of suffocation (as they can't always roll back as quickly). 60% of baby "sids" deaths between 4 and 6 months are due to suffocation on a toy, mattress, blanket or pillow.

Generally speaking, a 6 month old would be able to roll themselves back out of trouble during the night.

YANBU but I couldn't wait to get mine out of the bed! Bloody space hogging kicking hot water bottles

We often still have our 8 yr old DS in our bed, and know it won't be for long. Soon they will be older, I have loved co-sleeping and it has helped so much when they were younger, especially with b'feeding. Thankfully I had a supportive HV who was lovely, which helped.