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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Family problems

9 replies

Lj20051416 · 16/07/2017 18:42

Aibu being pissed off with this? My ohs family seem to dislike me for some strange reason.. ive always been nice to them involved them in stuff and they all talk about me behind my back, lie about me n push out my children. Whenever the mother sees me its like she cant be bothered she says hi but in a cba voice. She sees my ohs ex and always has a enthusiastic excited voice when speaking to her. She and rest of family is all over the child my oh has with his ex but the 2 we have together (and my child hes taken on) their not interested in. None of them give any of them attention its always ohs other child. There was a situation in which my ohs child could no longer live with us and one of ohs siblings said well you should have left her (me) and the other kids and got a place with your other child. His child is safe living with family and got all the needs met that a child needs. Another member of his family said he should never of got with me and had the kids because its not fair in his child. Me and oh was talking before and he said something about being a chef in a top restaurant n i said ah if that happened youd still be with ex probably coz ud have money and his mum had a huge smile on her face and said that wud be nice if u was still with her. Totally upset me coz its like they didnt want my children to be born. Angry aint the word. I have to still speak to them to stop arguments in family but i hate every second of it..

OP posts:
MommaGee · 17/07/2017 00:38

What does your OH say to them in response?

CoughLaughFart · 17/07/2017 01:23

Do you know what they particularly liked about the ex? Also, was your partner married to his ex? Perhaps they're anti-divorce and would resent any new partner rather than you personally.

Lj8893 · 17/07/2017 01:25

Why did your dsd have to stop living with you?

Italiangreyhound · 17/07/2017 01:35

Lj20051416 sorry this all sounds horrible. Does your other half support you?

Can I ask, feel free not to say, were you the reason that your other half's first marriage broke up?

I think you need to focus on your own family, OH and kids, don't allow his mum to talk down to you, or side line the kids. I'd probably minismise the amount of time with them.

How come your oh's first child doesn't like with their mum, or with you?

Good luck finding the way forward.

Groupie123 · 17/07/2017 08:27

Where is your dsd living? Why not living with you. I think that's probably where their resentment stems from tbh - they see you and your DP play happy families with your kids, but not his first kid. Before you roast me I have a dsd who lives with me as it was me and dh who were able to provide her with a good home and not DH's ex.

Supersoaryflappypigeon · 17/07/2017 08:37

It sounds as if ex was an integral part of the family, they all bonded with her and were upset when they split up.

Were you the reason they split up? If so, that might explain their behaviour.

Why can't his child live with you anymore? I must admit, I'd be pretty upset for my nephew if he could no longer live with one of his parents because of there not being enough room for him or something like that.

I do think it's unkind if you to suggest that it's ok that the child is ok because they are having their "needs met"-there's more to raising a child than being fed and watered.

Allthewaves · 17/07/2017 08:46

There sounds like lots of background story here. Why couldn't his child live with u anymore. Perhaps his family r very angry about the situation his child was put in

DressedCrab · 17/07/2017 08:59

Why isn't the SDC living with his/her mother?

twisterinyogapants · 17/07/2017 10:13

Why can't dsc with you ?

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