to like flirting with my ex-colleague?

[FluffyWhiteSlippers]

I have a boyfriend. I love him and I fancy him. I've put on a bit of weight in the last year (gone from a 6 to a 12/14) and I feel like shit about it. Boyfriend assures me he still thinks I'm gorgeous, but my confidence has hit rock bottom. I feel like an ugly cow and whilst I know how I feel about myself shouldn't be pegged to a man, boyfriend doesn't make me feel particularly attractive. Doesn't flirt, doesn't seem to want me like he used to.

I feel really crap.

Anyway, I've recently moved jobs (long story and all wrapped up in the feeling shit/weight gain thing). An ex colleague and I still keep in touch (there is a big group of us, its not like we're having any interaction one on one).

Last night we were all out drinking, and he was laying on the charm thick and fast. I played into it - I liked it very much and it made me feel good for the first time in ages.

I don't actually fancy him. Quite the opposite. And I love and very much see a future with my boyfriend.

I know I've got to work through my own confidence issues at the moment (and shift the weight). But on top of that I know feel cripplingly guilty about flirting.

Nothing happened, nothing will happen. Ex-colleague and I both know that. It really was just a harmless flirt - first and last time it will happen.

I wasn't planning on telling my boyfriend. Am I the worst person in the world?

Bumping. Sorry.

I think you need to ask yourself how you would feel if it was your BF flirting with one of his old work colleagues.

Ask yourself the question, but answer honestly

You are not the first or the last, but you do need to learn to step away from that kind of interaction for the sake of your relationship.

Honestly, I'd be ok. Going beyond a flirty interaction - repeat performances, texting, planning I'd be angry.

I'd also forgive a snog or even a shag if I was convinced it was a one-off mistake. Maybe I'm too forgiving?

You've nailed it Safe though. It's about remaining in control and not letting my ego run away with itself. The idea of hurting him doesn't bear thinking about.